Psychology

How to believe in yourself and overcome the fear of failure

Confidence in yourself and your abilities - the key to success. A person who considers himself a nonentity is doomed to failure. Fear of failure makes you abandon lofty goals, leaving unattended potential. Believing in yourself, on the contrary, gives you endless energy and strength, helps to reach incredible heights. A confident person can withstand and not break under the pressure of any obstacles and failures. But how to believe in yourself? What needs to be done to make fear and insecurity disappear?

Why not believe in yourself?

Take a closer look at small children. All babies are characterized by sincere conviction that they are right. They are ready to cry, shout, throw tantrums, just to get their way. They are sure that the whole world belongs to them. One has only to make a little effort and the desired will be yours.

But where does this sensation disappear with age? Many parents try to protect children from mistakes, and all the time they warn them. However, if the child constantly hears “you cannot succeed,” “you cannot”, “it is unprofitable, hopeless,” then his confidence will melt before your eyes. With such education, any goal will seem impossible.

Over time, a child who has not been taught in childhood to overcome obstacles and look for alternative ways to solve a problem will even more doubt himself and his abilities. Each failure will be perceived as a personal drama, a tragedy of universal proportions. In the end, an insecure adult will prefer to be content with little.

How to change?

It’s never too late to gain confidence in yourself, to become a confident and successful person. The main obstacle is fear. Sometimes it is really not easy to overcome it, but the expended efforts will definitely not be in vain. So what should you do?

  1. Feel your fear and insecurity, feel it with every skin cell. Try to describe your feelings. Where is he hiding? Perhaps your chest squeezes, breathing quickens, fingers get numb? Remember these emotions. Knowing your enemy "by sight" is very important.
  2. Accept yourself as you are. To be afraid is normal. The difference between a successful person and a loser is that the former has learned to deal with his fear. Do not scold yourself, you will definitely learn how to control this feeling.
  3. Enlist the support. Encouraging words, reliable rear are very important. You must strive to surround yourself with reliable people who are always ready to lend a helping hand.
  4. Set a goal. First, a small, easily doable. Develop a plan to achieve it. When you get what you want, remember these pleasant sensations. Now get down to work more difficult.
  5. Analyze what qualities help you in solving problems, and which, on the contrary, interfere. Concentrate on developing your positive sides. Remember that only the flower that is regularly watered grows.
  6. Make a list of your victories. It is not necessary to write them on a piece of paper. The main thing is to remember that reaching the goal is not a problem for you. Let not immediately, even if not quite as planned, but you did it. And do more than once.

What absolutely can not be done?

During life, we often make the same mistakes, each time stepping on the old rake. In order not to hurt the forehead completely, it is important to abandon the old pattern of behavior. Here is a list of those installations that are best abandoned forever:

  1. Self pity. A person who constantly complains, is deliberately set to fail. He sees only the obstacles to success, and misses the opportunities that fate presents to him.
  2. Comparing yourself with others. There is always someone smarter, more beautiful, richer. It makes no sense to envy others, it takes a lot of energy. It is important to find your way.
  3. Thoughts on the past. Constantly thinking about your past failures is a serious mistake. The future depends on what you do today. Act, live here and now.
  4. Despair. Every person should be able to maintain peace of mind in any situation. Panic or despair makes us helpless. In this state, it is extremely difficult to make the right decision.
  5. Shifting responsibility. Irresponsibility often results from self-pity. Such people are always guilty of someone or something - the weather, the intrigues of the enemies, the husband, the parents, the money. To become confident, to believe in yourself, it is important to take the reins in your hands.
  6. Despondency. No wonder Christians are discouraged - this is a mortal sin. Sometimes only optimism and sincere belief in success help to find a way out of a seemingly hopeless situation.

Practical advice

What is he, an unsure person? Most often, this is a smart guy who is afraid to talk to a girl, a hard worker who does not dare to hold a high position in the company, an excellent, kind hostess, who thinks she is ugly. Examples may be mass. All that unites these people is a weak side in their opinion. Therefore, you need to work on it.

To believe in yourself, you need to challenge your fear. Are you afraid to talk to a girl? Go out and go to the first counter. Consider yourself not beautiful? Sign up for a photo session and send a photo to a beauty contest.

Along the way, find yourself an occupation that, in your opinion, is worthy of respect. For example, it could be:

  1. Help orphans. Buy fruits, sweets, toys and visit the nearest orphanage. Chat with kids, give a piece of warmth and goodness.
  2. Caring for animals. Wrap up an afternoon lunch in your bag, feed the homeless at the door. If not, you can go to the zoo, taking with you a basket of apples and delicious vegetables.
  3. Circle or sports section. Dreamed of becoming an awesome ride? A voice singer? Graceful dancer? Act, everyone once started out small.
  4. Training. Sign up for courses if this is exactly what will help you to believe in yourself. And no matter how old you are. It's never too late to learn.
  5. Writing a book. If your fate is tragic, full of drama, write a novel. Firstly, it will help get rid of obsessive sad thoughts, and secondly, it will allow you to be proud of your work.

Sometimes it’s really hard to believe in yourself. Do not retreat. Personally, I advise you to look at the situation from a different angle. As they say, that does not kill us - it makes us stronger. Sublimate the energy of omnipotence, despair, fear, perhaps it will help to unleash your potential.

Watch the video: How To Overcome The Fear Of Failure - Tony Robbins (December 2024).