Stress and Depression

Is it possible to survive the death of a child and how to do it?

The loss of a child does not compare with anything. This is the worst thing that a parent can survive.

Child's death can make a difference in life, knock down and deprive of all the bright and good that people had.

With such a loss is terribly difficult to handle. It hurts both physically and morally. Man devastated and broken. But is there life after such terrible grief? How to make yourself live on?

What do parents feel who have lost children?

Parents who have lost children experience the most terrible grief that can only be.

All emotions and feelings increase and often unbearably painful to deal with it.

Grief, hopelessness, grief, guilt and much more are felt by parents who have lost their children. It is impossible to convey in words. Such a loss is very painful. It seems that it is simply impossible to survive.

The feeling of inner emptiness and the bitterness of loss may not leave their parents for a long time. It is very difficult for them to experience all this. But you need to fight and continue to live on.

What are the stages of a person experiencing the death of a child?

Each person, faced with such great grief, will experience it in his own way. As a rule, from 4 to 7 stages are distinguished, through which a person experiences loss:

  1. Negation - The incident introduces a person into a stupor, plunges into shock. He cannot believe what happened, even if he saw it with his own eyes. He does not want to admit this to himself, rejects what has happened. He can mix memories, confused thoughts, he becomes disoriented in time.

    At this stage, a person can be very absent-minded and forgetful. He begins to behave as he previously was not inherent. This phase does not last too long. But a person needs to go through it in order to accept the loss in the future. At this point, his family should take care that he was comfortable and not lonely.

  2. Anger, rage, resentment - the person starts to get angry at the situation. He hates everything around him, it seems to him that everything is wrong and unfair. He can break his anger on the dead child "How could you leave me." This period is very painful and emotional. All feelings come out. He may have a tantrum, he may lose his temper.
  3. Guilt - at this stage, the person begins to blame himself for what happened, for the fact that he did not spend much time with his child, he didn’t say anything. People start scrolling all their lives, all the memories and reproaching themselves.

    Guilt is deeply rooted in man. It can stay with him for many years, and even for life.

  4. Depression - usually occurs in the type of people who hold all their emotions and feelings inside. Everything seems gray, and life is meaningless. At this point, it is important that there be someone who will support. This phase can take a long time. From 2 months to 2 years. But, of course, everything is individual.
  5. Adoption - after all the previous stages, as a rule, acceptance and humility come to the person. Time will pass, emotions will die down and it is important at this moment to decide to live on, accept what happened and let go. Make it extremely difficult, but it is necessary. Losing a child is a very terrible grief and it is very difficult to accept him. But you need to live and return to the usual rhythm.

Is it possible to survive the grief?

Losing a child is the greatest grief that can only be. By the laws of nature, children are continuation, future. Parents should not bury their children.

But, unfortunately, it does not always happen. Children usually die from illness or accidents. Looking at all this, it is even more difficult for parents to cope with such grief.

But the loss of a child, like any other, can be overcome, although it is much more difficult to do.

It is necessary to let emotions godo not hold back everything in yourself. During this period, it is important not to be alone with your experiences.

You should not push aside help to your relatives, alone it is difficult to cope with such a misfortune.

They say the best way to deal with grief is get distracted by something neutral.

Of course, not immediately get it done. But over time, you need to get up and do.

And what to do, it does not matter. Things will distract from negative thoughts. No need to kill and grieve, do not care about yourself and your life.

Losing a child is certainly very hard, but you should not put an end to your life. Especially if there are still children or loved ones who need you to be sane.

Psychology tips

How to survive the loss of a child during pregnancy? It seems to some that if the child was not born, then it is easier to survive the loss. But it is not. Mom wears her baby under the heart, she feels him and already loves him immensely.

Therefore, it is also difficult for her to experience the loss, as well as others. The first thing to do is recognize and realize what happened. Then force yourself to get up and do something.

After miscarriage, women often become depressed, they need to get out of this state as quickly as possible.

If there are more children, they will help. After all, they need to take care.

Nothing cures like employment. Employment of children, work, household chores and other things.

In this case, time passes unnoticed, and all bad thoughts fade into the background.

How to survive the death of a newborn baby? The death of the long-awaited and beloved child in childbirth is very difficult to survive. He comes to this world and still does not have time to get acquainted with his parents, and they with him. It is very difficult to experience such grief.

Some advise having a baby right after the loss. But here everything is individual. Parents themselves must decide whether they are ready for it or best to wait.

Indeed, during pregnancy they will be afraid of problems, nervous and worried, and this can not very well affect the child. Therefore, before making such an important decision, you need to think carefully about everything.

How to live after losing a child? After parents lose their child, it is very difficult for them to return to their normal life. But it needs to be done. The main thing is to experience grief. Give a way to your emotions and feelings.

Cry out and speak out. It really needs to be done, it will make it easier.

Try don't get hung up on happened so as not to become obsessed with this situation.

It is difficult to do, but you need to try. You need to get up every morning and go about your business.

Prepare to eat, go to work, meet friends. It can't be done right away, but over time, everything will come to its senses.

How to help a loved one whose baby has died?

A man who lost a child need the support of loved ones. Even if they demonstrate with all their behavior that this is not so.

  1. Need to be near. It is important that the person knows that you are near all the time. No need to leave him, even if he wants it.

    You can leave him alone with himself, but you still need to be there.

  2. Be prepared to hear angry messages.. A person experiencing such a terrible loss can not control himself. Do not be offended and leave.
  3. Stay close to the funeral, even if you have very important things, they need to be canceled. At this point, the person is particularly acutely experiencing a loss, and it is important for him to know that you are near.
  4. Help a person with some chores. All that he needs - follow. Help around the house, prepare to eat and so on.
  5. Hug more often a loved one. Support him, listen to him, let him cry out.
  6. In no case can not say: “Calm down and live on,” “You must live on, your child would like it,” “You will have more children,” “Humble yourself,” and stuff like that.

    It is better to ask more often to tell about your feelings, because the grieving person needs to share with someone.

  7. No need to advise anything in this situation.. If there are no suitable words, then it is better to just be silent.
  8. No need to compare the death of a child with the death of someone else.. The death of a child is the greatest grief, which is incomparable with the death of a friend or grandmother.

Help groups and communities

Will grief help people in groups of moms and dads who have lost children? Where to find such a group?

Common grief brings people together. People who survived the death of a child understand each other better than anyone. This loss can not be compared with any loss. This grief is the most difficult.

It is difficult to support a person if he did not survive this. Therefore, those who survived the death of a child can help cope, calm down.

In such groups, people share their grief, memories, tell each other about their children, about their lives.

Together they grieve, cry and laugh, remembering happy moments. Such support is very important.

Especially those who just lost a child and do not know how to live on, how to cope with this loss. So people need to see those who could survive it. They need to talk. Only parents who have lost a child will be able to give the right advice.

Such groups can try to search in their own city. They must be organized in every city. Perhaps a psychologist or psychotherapist can help in the search. Such groups are sometimes organized at the church.

If the city has nothing of the kind, you can search in the Internet. There are various groups in social networks and forums.

On them, people correspond with each other, can talk by skype or phone. This option is good because support can be obtained at almost any time of the day.

How to stop thinking about the bad?

How to answer the question: “why give birth to children if they die?” A well-known fact - we all die one day. That's the way the world works, we are born, we live and then we die.

Someone comes to the finish line earlier, and someone later.

You can't treat life like that and assume that no need to have a babybecause he will die anyway.

If parents once experienced the loss of a child, they will think like that. They find it difficult to force themselves to decide on this, because they will be afraid all the time that this child may also leave them.

But do not think all the time and expect only the worst outcome. Kids are great. Once a misfortune has happened, it may not happen again. To live in constant fear is not difficult.

No need to dwell only on the bad. It is worth thinking how many bright and happy moments there are in raising children.

No need to constantly think that the child will die sooner or later. You just need to live and enjoy every momentallotted to you and your family.

The death of a child is a terrible loss. It is impossible to imagine such a thing, you will not wish this even to the worst enemy. When this happens, very difficult to force yourself to live your old life. But it needs to be done. Let it be incredibly difficult.

My child died. How to survive the death of your child? Find out from the video:

Watch the video: Father Gives Tips On How To Survive Child Loss (May 2024).