Love and relationship

How to find out if a guy loves you: the psychology of male love

Being in love changes a person's behavior; therefore, people in love who are close to the object of their adoration begin to behave differently.

And for many girls who are trying not to err in their feelings, the question arises: How do I know if a guy loves you? To answer it, you need to carefully observe how a man behaves and how he looks.

Psychology of a man in love

Love complex, multifaceted feeling, the formation of which depends on many factors, including:

  • individual preferences;
  • features of the appearance and personality of the mother (the relationship with the mother can have a tangible effect on the preferences of the man);
  • personal characteristics of men;
  • interests;
  • life goals.

The physiological basis of any love, both female and male, are hormones that are produced in the body.

They influence mood in a certain way, cause a feeling of lust, lead to characteristic changes in somatic state of lovesuch as fever, increased heart rate, increased blood pressure, a feeling of pleasant pressure in the abdomen (the very “butterflies”).

When a man felt that he was in love, he seeks to attract the attention of a woman, to cause her reciprocal feeling. During this period, love is the strongest and can drown out rational thinking.

A man is harder to control himself, he begins to behave differently, seeking to achieve the desired. If this succeeds, in the process of developing a relationship, he looks to a woman and begins to better understand what he wants from her.

How does he fall in love?

Understand, how men fall in love and how they feeleasier if we consider the stages of development of love:

  1. Sympathy. At the first stage, a man notices a girl, assesses her external data, observes behavior and seeks to learn about her as much as possible, if she somehow attracted him, he feels interested in her. A feeling of sympathy may arise suddenly or increase gradually, as the man learns more about the girl. Various things can warm up sympathy: the presence of common interests, the external attractiveness of a girl, a sense of respect for her (for example, she is smart and behaves with dignity in any situation).
  2. Infatuation. At this stage, the guy understands that he feels for the girl something more than just sympathy, and begins to care for her in the hope of getting a positive response.

    During this period, he already notices feelings that are characteristic of being in love, which arise when he is next to the object of love, thinks about it, fantasizes about it.

  3. Attraction Sexual desire and emotional attraction in one way or another accompany the man's love and appear in the second stage. They reach a peak when a woman begins to respond to courtship or in any other way shows that she has positive feelings towards a man. Even a small, partly contrived by the man himself marks of attention from the woman are able to give him confidence that you need to continue courtship.
  4. The desire to impress. In order to cause a woman a strong reciprocal feeling of love, a man is ready for much. He tries to show himself from the best side, begins to carefully monitor his appearance and behavior, gives gifts, invites for dates, may start worrying about trifles, if they, in his opinion, are capable of spoiling something, showing ingenuity. His feeling of love is still at the peak and stirs the desire to please the girl as much as possible.
  5. Reflections. The feeling of being in love softens a little, and the man begins to think about what he wants from the existing relationship and what needs to be done for that. He tries to understand better how serious they are, whether he wants to see this girl next to him for a long time. It is also important for him to know if she really is in love with him.

In the future, his feelings develop in two scenarios: either love goes out or is transformed into love.

What is he experiencing?

How does a man understand that he is in love? There is hardly a person who does not understand that he is in love.

Have love bright featureswhich distinguish it from other senses, and the key of them is the somatic manifestations that occur while being next to a woman: fever, excessive sweating, trembling in the limbs, changes in the cardiovascular system.

There may also be a feeling of arousal, and in men it is more pronounced than in women.

Somatic manifestations and sexual desire are harmoniously combined with a strong feeling of sympathy, the desire to help, support, desire put yourself in the best light and get a response.

Thoughts of a man in love, especially when his feeling is maximally manifested, revolve around a girl he likes, so it can be difficult for him to concentrate on affairs.

Some people fall in love, on the contrary, it is beneficial: they are full of strength and energy, their brain is working more actively, and vital tasks are solved with ease.

Signs of

Signs of love can be divided into:

  • behavioral. By the way a man behaves and talks, you can judge the presence or absence of feelings;
  • non-verbal. These include gestures, facial expressions, especially movements. These nuances are more difficult to notice, but they can be no less informative than behavioral ones. It is especially useful to pay attention to them in cases where a man is able to control his behavior well.

Behavioral signs of love:

  1. He is shy or, on the contrary, tries to show himself. Anxious, shy man, feeling love, may try to step over himself to attract the attention of the girl. If before that he was restrained and unsociable, these attempts may be awkward, which will be noticeable. And some men who were determined to be in love may, like a brave captain from a children's song, begin to stutter and fade. This is especially true for young men.
  2. Trying to help. Whenever possible, he tries to do something useful for a girl he likes: he helps to carry weights, agrees to replace her at work, keeps her jacket so that she is more comfortable to wear.
  3. It revives, as soon as it sees a girl in love with. When a girl who causes him strong sympathy is absent, he looks calm, restrained, may look bored or tense, as if expecting something. As soon as she appears in his field of vision, he becomes animated, becomes smiling and more active, lets out jokes, and is willing to help.
  4. Seeks to be close. Even if a man has not yet admitted sympathy, he will try to stay nearby, remind himself in various ways. For example, he may give gifts, be interested in the opinion of a girl who is dear to him, sit down or walk beside her, often talk to her, which may even look intrusive.

Also a man in love changing in appearance: begins to take care of himself, begins to play sports, puts on the best clothes, carefully comb his hair, can change his hairstyle.

To make an impression, he can start doing things that no one expects from him, for example, to come to work on a new bike.

Nonverbal signs:

  1. Seeks to prettify. As soon as the object of his attention is in sight, he tries to improve his appearance: he smoothes his hair or, conversely, tousles them, dushes off his clothes, smoothes his beard.
  2. Hides his hands in his trouser pockets, leaving his thumb outside. With this gesture, he involuntarily seeks to draw attention to his genitals. Such gestures have a close relationship with the animal instincts of ancestor monkeys.
  3. Turns the toe of the foot toward the girlin love with.
  4. Tries to be in hot air: straightens the back, draws in the stomach, tries to make the walk more beautiful and more even.
  5. Shortens the distance. At any opportunity he tries to get closer to her. He also tends to turn full face during a conversation.
  6. Actively gesticulating. His gesticulation becomes sharper and more noticeable: he waves his arms, may look impulsive, overly active, emotionally over-excited.
  7. His nostrils are open. The nostrils of a man in love swell as if he does not have enough air, which is especially noticeable during a dialogue with him.
  8. The pupils of his eyes are dilated. Extremely characteristic sign of having love. That hormonal surge, which occurs in the body of a man in love, is similar to the surge, observed during drug use. Therefore, the pupils of people in love are overly dilated when they are close to the beloved.

Heightened nervousness can be a sign of love: a man always twirls something in his fingers, it may not be necessary to respond, hides his eyes.

12 signs that a guy loves you:

How to recognize?

Most men, regardless of age, behave while in love in a similar way. But there are some differences in the behavior of boys and adult men, married and free guys.

Listen to the advice of psychologists:

  1. How to understand that the guy loves you? Watch his behavior: watch how he behaves in your presence, whether he often tries to be around, offers help, is interested in your life, gives gifts, does he have signs of attention. If you already have a relationship, it is important to wait several months for the ardor to subside, and to observe how a man behaves, how polite, careful he is, and how he feels about the idea of ​​being together for many years. Time is the best test of love.
  2. How to find out if a boy loves you? Children, unlike adults, are inexperienced in love, so they do not always understand how best to express their own feelings. A boy in love with a girl can blush in her presence, stutter, do various stupid things so that she would pay attention to him, joke. However, violence (twitching of pigtails, kicks, insults, taking things) should not be considered a sign of sympathy. Contrary to the prevailing stereotype, such mockery can hardly be a sign of any warm feelings. So that the boy quickly decided to confess, you can try to spend more time with him, more often to communicate with him.
  3. How to determine that a married man fell in love? If a married man feels in love, he may become more nervous, because during this period there is a struggle in his head: he is trying to make a decision. However, many signs of love will also be present.

    A married man, not tuned for treason, may begin to avoid the object of love, waiting for the feeling to subside.

  4. How to recognize that an adult man in love? Adult, mature men, in whose life there were many lovers, better than young men, control themselves if they need it. Because of this, it is more difficult to understand that a man is in love. If there are no obvious signs of falling in love, and the man does not go for rapprochement, the best option is to wait. Perhaps the assumption that he is experiencing something was initially erroneous. Or, on the contrary, he will later decide to confess.

How does a man fall in love? Nonverbal signs:

How to check if the guy likes?

Grooming, good sex, beautiful words, lots of gifts do not always say that a man tuned to a serious relationship and really loves. Therefore, a woman may want to check whether they love her.

Key recommendations:

  1. Observation Imperceptibly watch him, track how he behaves with you, whether he is often around, whether he listens to your opinion, whether he is correct, whether he supports you, whether he helps, whether he is careful. Some women who love a man tend to misinterpret his rather mundane words and actions, regarding them as a sign of reciprocity. It is important not to fall into this trap.
  2. Conversation. Try asking him in the forehead when it is convenient. You can also take a detour and confess first: perhaps your confession will push him to confess in response. You can also try to start a serious conversation with him: ask him about future plans, ask if he wants to see you next to him for a long time, whether he sees you as a future wife. This option works especially well with pragmatic, rational men.
  3. Time. If everything suits you and anxiety about “loves or not loves” doesn’t itch in your head too annoyingly, you can give life to go on. Over time, a lot of things will be placed on the shelves by themselves, and it will become clear what was going on.

    If a man did not take you seriously, after a while it will become obvious.

  4. Experiment. This option is not suitable for everyone, and in some cases it is better not to carry it out. However, a properly conducted experiment is really able to show how much a guy values ​​you. For example, you can pretend to be sick and ask him to take care of you (it is advisable to do this on a weekday when the guy is at work) or to ask for an unpleasant service.

How to understand that a man in love? Women's illusions about male love:

The husband does not like his wife: behavior

Love, even the strongest, at some point may weaken, leading to changes in the relationship between husband and wife.

Key features:

  • a man emotionally closes, less often shares experiences;
  • raises his wife's hand, insults, humiliates;
  • becomes the initiator of quarrels;
  • often angry, finding fault with trifles;
  • behaves as if his wife was annoying;
  • refuses to help;
  • does not care, is not interested in the well-being of his wife;
  • delayed at work;
  • often absent from home;
  • does not participate in family activities;
  • tenderness and caress are unpleasant to him;
  • avoids sex;
  • refuses to solve family problems, shifts responsibility to his wife.

These changes in relationships do not fall like snow on the head. Problems slowly accumulatethere are more and more unpleasant situations, and at some point a woman realizes that her husband does not love her.

This awareness can break it, especially if their relationship lasted for more than a decade.

If you feel that your husband does not love you, you feel depressed, weak, often crying, you should contact a psychotherapistto get help.

A psychotherapist can also help preserve your relationship and breathe new life into it if you and your spouse are willing to work on it together.

How to find out if a man loves or not? Relationship psychology:

Watch the video: Body Language Men Use To Show Love (May 2024).