Family for any person is of great importance because it is the basis of his whole life.
Family relationships may not always develop safely. There are various ways to solve a problem.
Concept
What is family relationships?
Family relationships - This is the interaction between people who are members of one family on the basis of kinship or marital relationships.
The most important types of family relationships are the interaction between husband and wife, between parents and children.
Every family is small socio-psychological grouphaving its own characteristics.
The nature of family relationships depends on many factors: the level of education of family members, the degree of trust in each other, the psychological characteristics of the participants in the relationship, the degree of emotional closeness, etc.
Psychology
Psychology of family interpersonal relationships provides for an analysis of not only the relationship between husband and wife, but also the peculiarities of interaction between parents and children.
Between husband and wife
From a social and legislative point of view in our country, man and woman are recognized as family only with official marriage.
From a psychological point of view, the situation is different.
Often officially registered with each other, people decide impossibility of maintaining relationships and cease to maintain a common household.
Separate living, a separate budget and the complete absence of joint interests testify in this case to the absence of a family. In this case, from the point of view of the law, man and woman are spouses.
There is also a downside, when a man and a woman have a common life, common children, solve all problems together and are not official spouses.
In this case, they themselves consider themselves a family, but from the point of view of the state they are not.
If we consider the concept of family not as a social cell of society, and as a union of people close to each other, the family will be understood as a man and a woman who are in stable relationships and who consider each other as family.
Between parents and children
The main function of the family is the birth and rearing of offspring.
Tasks of parents after the birth of children:
- education;
- providing educational opportunities;
- the provision of material goods;
- spiritual, aesthetic, moral development of children;
- providing emotional, psychological support;
- protection of the interests of children.
Children throughout their lives in the parental family adopt habits, attitudes and patterns of relationships between parents. The presence of serious problems in the family, conflicts between spouses reflected negatively for all subsequent life of children.
The task of parents is to demonstrate the right behavior, which will serve as an example for the younger generation.
Often, as children grow up, parent-child relationships undergo changes: appears coldness, detachment. Most often, such problems are faced by families during adolescence in children.
The formation of their own ideas and attitudes, the emergence of new interests can lead to the denial of children instilled in parents values. The task of parents in this period is to overcome the difficulties that arise, to build a dialogue with children.
The functions of parents change significantly when children reach adulthood communication is equalbecause children become independent members of society.
The situation is reversed when parents reach their advanced years. During this period, the parents themselves are already dependent on children, as they need help and support.
Styles
The following common styles of family relationships can be distinguished:
- Dictate. One family member subordinates to his will all the rest of its members. The dictator solves all important issues without taking into account the opinions of other relatives.
- Custody. Someone from the family, usually the mother, shows excessive care in relation to the rest of the family members. As a result of this guardianship, relatives cannot fully manage their lives and make independent decisions.
- Cooperation. The most comfortable and correct kind of relationship, in which all family members interact with each other on an equal footing. Cooperation between spouses is the basis of a strong marriage, provided that it is combined with spiritual intimacy.
Intimate relationships
Intimate relationship between spouses play a huge role in family well-being. Most divorces occur precisely because of problems in the intimate sphere, which often lead to a whole complex of mutual claims and offenses.
Intimate problems usually occur in families after several years of marriage, when the spouses, under the influence of a large number of domestic problems, cease to have an interest in each other.
In the place of love and attraction comes the habit, which makes the spouses partners and friends.
Only couples who have possess initial compatibility in the intimate sphere and make efforts to maintain interest in each other in the process of family life.
Family relationship
These are relationships between close people who have become relatives of each other as a result of marriage or on the basis of consanguinity.
When relatives are related by blood, people who have a single ancestor are recognized: parents and children, brothers and sisters, uncles and aunts with nephews, grandparents and grandchildren, etc.
When marriages occur, an inherent kinship occurs when the blood relatives of the spouses become members of one family: mother-in-law and mother-in-law with daughter-in-law, father-in-law and mother-in-law with son-in-law, devery, sister-in-law, etc.
Emotional
Emotional family relationships are crucial because they determine the degree of satisfaction of the spouses of their marriage and the level of comfort and securitythat are provided to children. Relations between loved ones should be built on trust, respect and support.
It has long been proven that people who grew up in families with a bad emotional climate are unlikely to be able to build strong relationships in the future.
Any emotional problems in the family (quarrels of parents, negative habits of parents, exaggerated demands on children, lack of mutual support and trust between family members) negatively affect the psyche of the child, his character and confidence.
Democratic
Equality and partnership between spouses, between parents and children - pledge of healthy family relationships.
Despite the fact that in any family there is an unspoken leader, but children must initially obey their parents All contacts can be based on respect for each other's interests, mutual assistance and support.
The full participation of all family members in addressing key issues allows not only to avoid conflicts, but also to unite all with a single goal.
Affiliate
Husband and wife are first of all. partners.
Moreover, in the process of marriage, it is the role of partners that begin to dominate in the relations of spouses, pushing the relationship of lovers into the background.
Spouses, being partners, solve a whole range of tasks: parenting, maintaining material well-being, the structure of everyday life, supporting each other in solving professional problems, etc.
After giving birth
Birth of a child - a transitional period for any family, which often becomes the cause of a crisis in family life.
With the birth of a child, spouses lose the opportunity to spend time fully together and manage their lives, the level of material well-being decreases, women often face postpartum depression.
It is important for spouses to go through a difficult period after the birth of a child together and concentrate on receiving positive emotions from communication with a new family member, from participating in his upbringing.
Secrets, secrets and rules of an ideal family life
The basic principles on which the life of truly happy families is based:
- Mutual respect and trust. This applies not only to spouses, but also parents with children. In a family where everyone respects each other, listens to everyone’s opinion and is always ready to help, conflicts and misunderstandings can arise.
- The ability of men to take responsibility. The man is the head of the family. At present, this role is often owned by a woman and most conflicts arise precisely because the man ceases to be responsible for the family, and the woman takes on non-female responsibilities.
- The desire of women to be mother and mistress. The main purpose of a woman is to maintain home comfort and parenting.
Family life should be organized in such a way that a woman always has enough time and energy for a house, for a husband, for children.
- The ability of the spouses to escape from everyday life. Often the relationship ends because of the cooling of the man and the woman to each other, caused by the departure from their relationship of romance and passion. Spouses should always remember that they are not only partners and parents, but also loving people. The ability to find time for joint leisure is an important factor in maintaining relationships.
Stages
Family relationships go through the following stages:
- Premarital chat. Lovers meet an average of 9-12 months before deciding to marry. Someone comes to this decision before the deadline, someone much later. The decision to marry may be caused by a sincere desire to start living together or by other factors: the pursuit of selfish goals, the pregnancy of a woman, the solution of the housing problem, etc.
- Standoff. The beginning of a joint life is always accompanied by conflicts, because invariably there is a clash of interests. Often, divorces occur precisely at the stage of confrontation, if the parties do not find the strength or desire to find compromises.
- Compromise. Spouses distribute rights and obligations, reach mutual understanding on key issues.
- Mature family relationships. Family life is in the usual direction, the spouses have a final distribution of roles.
- A crisis mid-life. After about 14–15 years of marriage, most people reach the age of 40, when a midlife crisis sets in. The routine of family life often pushes people to divorce in order to obtain new emotions, changes in the usual way of life.
- Reviving relationships. Having survived the crisis and not taking rash steps, the spouses are even more convinced of the need for each other. At this stage, the value of the family and the partner itself increases significantly.
- The omission of the "nest". The beginning of independent living by children often leads to a crisis in relations between spouses - with the loss of the parental function, the main meaning of life is lost.
- Death spouse. The death of one of the spouses leads to the logical ending of the couple's family relationships.
Diagnostics - techniques
Sometimes family conflicts become seriouswhen the participants themselves cannot resolve the situation.
In this case, it is recommended to seek help and advice from specialists in family relationships.
Research and analysis of family relationships will identify existing problems and identify ways to resolve them. The main directions of diagnosis:
- The study of the distribution of roles in the family. The specificity of building communications in a particular family, the distribution of functions, the emotional climate, and existing problems are considered.
- The study of the relationship between parents and children. There is an identification of violations in the process of education.
- Exploring the marital relationship. Assessment of satisfaction with marriage, the level of conflict in the couple, the existing contradictions.
Causes of crisis
Why are family relationships deadlocked or cooled? Main reasonsfor which family relationships may come to a standstill:
- fading of love;
- lack of common interests;
- monotony of life;
- the destructive effect of external factors (material difficulties, problems with children, professional problems of one of the spouses, etc.);
- problems in the intimate sphere, treason;
- selfishness;
- difference in ideology.
How to fix the situation?
How to improve family relationships if they are cold? Successfully get out of this situation and save the family by following the advice of psychologists:
- To take the responsibility. Each spouse must realize their mistakes and draw the appropriate conclusions. The recognition of problems and the desire to work on them can lead to significant changes.
- To discuss all the problems. It is important not to carry insults. This only exacerbates the conflict situation. Constant open dialogue - a pledge of understanding in the family.
- Improve your sex life. Family relationships will never be cloudless in the presence of problems in the intimate sphere.
It is important to make efforts to solve problems in this area and eliminate thoughts of betrayal.
- Find common interests, hobbies. If partners have nothing in common, they will never be one. It is important to find some good occupation, a hobby that will unite the spouses.
Thus, family relationships play a key role in personal development and development. The well-being of a family directly depends on the desire of all its members for mutual respect and support.
Psychology of the relationship between men and women in the family:
