To be able to get people interested is awesome skillwhich can open many doors and help a person achieve desired goals.
Someone's ability to arouse interest is manifested as an innate gift, while others can train and practice this skill.
What is it for?
Where can this be used?
The ability to interest an individual or public helps to convey to people their key thoughts and stimulate the audience to perceive these thoughts in a positive way.
This skill can be successfully used in:
- personal sphere (like the representative of the opposite sex, convince his other half of the need to perform certain actions, convincingly bring apologies, make new friends, be a "company soul" and be popular among acquaintances);
- professional field (successfully present yourself as a specialist, your product and your skills, promote your ideas and attract new partners / investors);
- household sphere (enjoy the sympathy of random people who may be helpful).
Can anyone please absolutely?
Psychologists say that you can like absolutely anyone (even if he has prejudices about you).
It will just take a little more time and effort to “convert” people opposed to you.
In order to cause sympathy, you must use three channels:
- communication (this may be a dialogue or a monologue of one of the participants in the conversation);
- body language (body position, movement, and fleeting gestures, touches, and traditional signs);
- emotional background (sensual and emotional component, which can be clearly seen during the interaction of people).
If you correctly combine these elements, you can find the key to the heart of a person and make him a loyal friend / listener / fan / employee / client, etc.
How to attract people to yourself?
How do people like? Psychological advice:
- Being in a big company, people interrupt each other or wait for their turn to take the floor, but at the same time expect to get the attention of the crowd.
And the person who is currently telling a joke or story is always looking for support. He begins to look around the audience in order to understand who he will be guided by.
Become such a guide by showing a hot interest.. Nod your head in time with the story, smile at the funny moments, ask clarifying questions and watch the narrator with a look. So you can quickly and painlessly endear a person broadcasting to a large audience.
- Be open to the interlocutor or interlocutors. No crossed arms and legs, covering the face of hair or hats, sidelong glances and a half-turn position. Even the socks of the shoes should be turned towards your opponent.
- Do not be afraid to look the man in the eye. In order to disappear awkwardness, try to remember the color and pattern of the eyes of the interlocutor. To do this, it will take quite a long time to study the face of a person, maintaining eye contact.
- Do not think about your shortcomings. If it seems to you that you have an ugly nose, you do not need to take a static and “advantageous” position in front of your interlocutor in order to slightly embellish the reality.
People do not notice most of the "defects" of appearance, to which we attach great importance.
Yes, and your strange behavior will not be overlooked. People around us see 40% more beautiful than we think about ourselves.
- Take care of your appearance. Book choose on the cover. Therefore, appearance plays a big role in the issue of winning sympathy. Your appearance should be neat, tidy, restrained.
- Do not fuss. Unnecessary movements, small and frequent gesticulations, constant attempts to pull up or fix clothes distract. This annoying bustle, like a mosquito, takes all the thoughts of the interlocutor. He does not hear the words addressed to him and wants to quickly complete the dialogue.
- Keep your posture. The correct posture speaks for you, demonstrating confidence and reliability.
- Do not violate personal boundaries. If you come close enough to a person and your interlocutor becomes nervous, it is better to slightly increase the distance. Once it becomes clear that the person is ready for closer contact and is located to you, you can go for rapprochement.
- Ask questions. People love to talk about themselves. Give them that opportunity, and you can quickly win the love of your interlocutor. If a person feels constrained and does not make contact, ask open and suggestive questions that will help him to talk (ask about his occupation, interests, preferences in cinema and music, attitudes towards pets, etc.).
- Use the name. This is a magical effect on the interlocutor. In everyday life, we enter into a dialogue without names, simply maintaining a conversation with an interesting person through questions and answers. Therefore, people so rarely hear their name.
And periodically contact the interlocutor by name, this will allow him to feel how individually your appeal.
- When you meet, actively show the emotion of joy.. You should not overdo it, rushing to a man like a dog on a bone. But to smile, firmly shake hands or slightly hug a person is simply necessary.
- Cultivate positive emotions. Try to offer for discussion only positive news and events, refrain from insults and discussions, expressing dissatisfaction with life, etc.
If you need to win over a person who loves to gossip, go on a negative wave and condemn others, don't stop all this talk.
Roughly having straightened a person, you only show your superiority and provoke irritation.
Better gently and unnoticed translate the topic on other things and events.
Practical techniques
How do people like? Practical techniques will help to quickly gain attention and sow the grain of sympathy that will sprout in the course of interaction with a person or audience:
- Make a mistake. If you intentionally make a mistake, and then accept the amendment by the interlocutor and slightly embarrass, you can bribe any person.
Making mistakes, we demonstrate that there are no perfect people.
This allows the interlocutor to feel emotional comfort next to a person on the highest steps of the social ladder. In addition, the opponent will not be afraid to make a mistake in the future, and therefore will not be cautious and straighten himself.
- Make compliments "other people's hands." People usually have mixed feelings, receiving direct compliments or praise from the other person. They begin to be embarrassed, lost and suspect the author of pleasant words in rough flattery. Therefore, it is more effective to say compliments from a third party: “Anna Sergeyevna, your employee Nikolai admired your development plan for the department so much yesterday!”
- Stimulate a person on self-praise. To do this, praise the way of behavior or thinking, and not the person himself. For example, an acquaintance tells you: “In 4 days I learned how to solve these complex tasks.” You can answer this way: "Probably, it is incredibly difficult to deal with examples from higher mathematics in 4 days." Here your friend will certainly praise himself: “Yes, I have worked well, you can’t argue with that.” By allowing a person to praise himself, you make him happy.
- Do not be afraid to ask for help.. People appreciate those for whom they were able to demonstrate their nobility, as well as those in whom they invested their own resources.
Therefore, if you ask for a favor (simple), the chances for a person to be liked will increase.
- Try to limit "uncertain phrases." “It seems to me,” “I think,” “I do not insist that this is correct,” and other phrases that emphasize a person’s insecurity in their words can turn their interlocutor away from you. Limit such introductions.
How to get interested in yourself and your services?
In order to interest people not only in their own person, but also in their services, they will have to try. The most important condition is to show benefit at the introductory words stage. The sooner you offer the benefits the more likely to keep the attention of a potential client.
Actual and useful offer - uniqueness
An interesting proposal is born at the intersection of benefit and uniqueness.
You can help solve a person’s problem with the latest method, a personally developed strategy, or a universal approach.
If you can clearly identify what customer needs you are overlapping, and why your method / product is good, people's attention is guaranteed.
Down with the tinsel!
Do not use complex lexical constructions during presentations and stories about your products / services. Discard office supplies.
People fed up with pretentious advertisements and cliched phrases do not trust “market leaders”, “the best product according to the results of the study”, “a team of specialists with extensive experience in the field”, etc.
Speak in fact and accessible words. Common phrases like “our company has a lot of experience” should be replaced by “we have been working in this niche for 8 years already, 5 of which our employees have been studying at the courses for ...”.
Tell a story
The best way to get a client interested is to tell him a story, endowing the product or service with "soul".
You can say that you invented the super-powerful vacuum cleaner.
And you can tell that 4 years worked on the development of this miracle of technology, since you have two children who are constantly littering and have to clean up after them.
And in order to make the cleaning process easier and involve children in it, a powerful two-handle vacuum cleaner was developed for the parent and child. The story will help to earn the trust of listeners. and instill confidence in your competence.
Be yourself
Admit that you are going through and can get off speaking to an audience. Tell us what is the first public experience for you. or personal presentation.
Thus, you show that the human is not alien to you, and earn the credibility of the listener.
What mistakes to avoid?
Psychologists and coaches advise to avoid the following measures:
- Do not touch controversial topics. (religion, politics, faith). This way you can greatly harm communication, turning even a positive-minded interlocutor against yourself.
Do not try to "get into the soul". If a person is not ready to tell you his secrets, to confide in difficult periods and events in life, to cry in a vest, you shouldn’t push him to it.
- Do not be disingenuous. Hypocrisy is felt at the level of feelings and intuition. If you are trying to show joy and respect, currying favor with the character you hated, he will certainly feel false. In such a situation, it is better to behave neutrally.
- Do not be annoying. You should not try to convince people, wrap them to the "truth" and prove their case.
Even if you do it in a mild form, a hint of unwillingness to continue this conversation should serve as a stop signal for you and a reason to change the topic.
The best helper in building effective communication is sincerity. Try to set yourself up for a positive wave, so that you can easily carry it to the masses.
Then you will not have to deceive and try on masks, which means that you will easily get people to be accommodated.
How to attract people to yourself:
