If you have a question: how to understand that it is time to divorce, then In a relationship, something is not going well.
In harmonious couples, people usually do not think about such things.
Leave your husband or endure?
Many women for years tolerate a husband who does not suit them, but at the same time continue to live with him.
They complain to friends, go to psychologists, but nothing changes. However, they suffer from neurosis, depression, fears, low self-esteem.
They cannot experience true happinessbecause the man next to them is not able to give it. Once such a woman still has a question: get a divorce or endure.
She finds for herself the reasons why you shouldn’t leave him: children need a father, they need to be raised to their feet, and where I will go, and suddenly nobody needs me. As a result, the decision is all postponed, and the woman is moving further away from the feeling of happiness.
Of course, for her, no one decides whether she should leave. However It is worth answering important questions for yourself:
- “Does this man satisfy me physically, emotionally financially?”;
- “Do I feel safe with him?”;
- “Do my children feel comfortable with him, do they feel safe, does living with this man affect their mental state and development?”;
- "Do I want to feel like a happy, free, full-fledged woman?"
Answering the question, is it time to leave, the woman in the first place should understand yourself, their desires, goals, characteristics of character and attitude with the opposite sex.
Do not think that the partner suddenly change just because you want it. Or scared of your tears and threats. A man has a different structure than a woman.
He is less emotional and more practical. And his main need, as a male, is control your woman. However, some men cross the line in attempts to dominate, as a result, the woman lives under constant pressure.
You must decide for yourself what happiness means to you. Do you want to live in harmony, enjoy every day spent with your loved one, and not be afraid of his bad mood, aggression and criticism.
There is a category of women that falls into an emotional dependence on a partner. It is impossible to live with him, but it is psychologically difficult to leave. So women need help from: close people or psychologists.
Answer for yourself the question: why do you tolerate bad attitude, indifference, physical or moral violence?
Perhaps a little girl lives in you afraid to go out into the big world, take responsibility for their lives. A man seems to you support and support, but in fact undermines the psyche, causing the development of psychological trauma.
Objective reasons for parting
When exactly need to divorce her husband?
There are moments when divorce is really necessary.
This is not just a desire - he bore me, namely, good reasons why it is impossible to continue living with this person.
- Alcoholism, drug addiction. Alcohol and illicit substances are good reasons why it’s no longer worth living with this person. If he does not want to be treated for the sake of preserving the family, then you have every right to leave him. First and foremost is your safety and children.
- Physical abuse. Unfortunately, the statistics are such that many women continue to endure beatings and still live with their husband. The installation has taken root in our nation: it beats, it means that it loves. In fact, the use of physical violence is disrespect for a woman, a desire to show his superiority, because other methods of improving self-esteem for this man are simply not available.
If you are not able to get away from a man for psychological reasons and strong dependence, contact a psychologist.
- Moral violence. To “beat” the victim, it is not necessary to use physical violence. Words can hurt just as badly. Some men with a psychopathic personality trait successfully manipulate their victims, making them dependent on themselves, not letting go and enjoying power. After living with such spouses, women need long-term rehabilitation.
- Mental illness, dangerous for people close to people. If you have children, consider whether you endanger them.
- Cheating. “All men are walking” is not a reason to endure a traitor. The worst option is when he tells you this openly. Thus, he shows you that he does not respect you as a person and wife at all.
If you feel the constant tension attempts to manipulate you to the detriment of your freedom, opinion, desires, such a man should not be close.
With a real man, a woman feels winged, protected. He will never raise his hand to her, not offended. Naturally, conflicts happen in any family, but they must be resolved rationally, without transition to personalities.
If a man uses his power, and a woman suffers from this, then think, but do you need such a partner nearby? Yes, the spouse is a priori head of the family, but at the same time he should not be an oppressor.
If you are married experiencing mostly negative emotions, it means you just don’t fit together. And the question arises: why suffer all your life with an unsuitable person, if you can find someone with whom you will be happy?
An unsure lady is afraid that she will not be able to find a new partner. This is mistake. It is enough for you to work on yourself, to become a self-sufficient and independent person, and then the corresponding man will definitely be found.
Our fears are often unfounded, and the reason for them is previously transferred problem situationsmainly from childhood.
How to understand that divorce with the wife is inevitable?
You doubt whether there will be a divorce.
Or just assume that the spouse is thinking, if you do not disperse.
Another person’s thoughts are almost impossible to read., but there are signs that tell you that your family is on the verge of divorce.
let's consider the signs, by which one can understand that it is almost inevitable:
- the wife says openly that she wants to break up;
- one of the spouses or both ceased to be interested in intimate relationships, they even became unpleasant, people avoid them;
- constant scandals, disrespect for the identity of another person;
- obvious treason;
- the partner has ceased to take into account your opinion, share experiences, interesting events;
- the wife hides something, keeps back, hides her eyes when trying to ask open-ended questions;
- in a family, the main emotions and actions are irritation, aggression, mutual reproaches, rudeness;
- important issues are resolved independently;
- the wife stopped being interested in where the husband is, why he comes home late, how he felt, whether he had dinner;
- when trying to show signs of attention, the spouse expresses irritation, aggression.
If you yourself, man, want a divorcethen it might look like this:
- your wife annoys you so much;
- you don't want intimacy with her;
- try to be at home as little as possible;
- stopped sharing with her the events of his life;
- you had thoughts of divorce;
- decided to treason.
Tips for men aiming for freedom
In which cases divorce my wife while not worth it? Listen to the advice of psychologists. Do not always run right away to file for divorce. It is likely that there is an opportunity to change everything.
Relationships in a couple go through several stages, and crisis periods are inevitable. It is possible that your relationship is now experiencing a crisis.
This is an opportunity to look at your partner in a different way. change your view of it yourself, change the direction of your life, reconsider family values.
If you only have a child in your family, and your relationship has gone wrong, do not rush to run after divorce. During this period it is difficult for everyone. A man worries that he lacks attention - this is normal.
But woman is now the hardest - She has gone through a difficult stage of pregnancy, then giving birth, now she has to take care of the baby and stay with him around the clock.
Naturally, she may not have enough time for anything else.
Instead of rushing for a divorce, try to understand your spouse and help her in the difficult task of caring for your baby. This can unite the family and direct the relationship in a more positive direction.
If you, as a man, have suddenly made a mistress and are thinking whether it’s time to leave the family for a new partner, you shouldn’t hurry right away, but rather weigh all the pros and cons. A new wife is not necessarily better.
This is at first love you think you live and communicate with her. more comfortable and more interesting.
According to statistics, departed husbands often try to return to the family again, but they do not take them back so often. Therefore, it is worth considering - is it really necessary to break the family for the sake of a new partner?
How to understand that a partner wants to get a divorce?
If the spouse wants a divorce, he will usually reports this in the open.
Men do not like reluctance, and if they have already made a decision, they strive to fulfill it.
As a rule, before that he becomes pensive, less talkative, he has appear their secrets. Such a man may find reasons not to spend the night at home, arguing that he needs to go to his parents or he wants to spend time with friends.
You, as a spouse, feel that a man has ceased to be interested in you, became completely indifferentbewildered. Sometimes he tries to hide his guilt behind the manifestation of aggression, accusations against you.
If a person does not want to declare a divorce first, he can provoke his partner into conflicts. You start accusing him, criticizing him, and in the meantime, having found the reason, he turns around and leaves, although in fact the decision was made long ago, just needed a clear reason.
Women more secretive. They may fear their husband, especially if he is capable of aggression.
Before the final decision to go to the divorce spouse may begin to save money, so she had enough for the first time. If you do not have children, then she refuses to start them, arguing that it is too early or she simply does not want.
Also, consciously or unconsciously, a woman can provoke you into a scandal on the smallest of occasions.
She shows eternal discontent, prefers to spend time with her friends, but not with you.
Should guard sharp change in behavior, the sudden installation of passwords on the phone, the closure of social networks to view.
Divorce or not - only you decide. But it is important to understand that not always obviously bad relationships can be restored, especially if the partner does not seek this.
On the preservation of the union should definitely work two peopleand then it will be strong, and the family will exist for many years.
How to understand what you need to leave? How to decide on a divorce? Find out from this video:
