The past is the storehouse of our victories and mistakes. It has great power. We remember him, we resurrect, we drag it into the present. We are nostalgic. But gradually we trust nostalgia so much that we allow it to "steer". Why? Perhaps the case of fear of changing something familiar? Or inability to improve self-esteem in the present? The painful and sweet memories of children's parties and the first kiss in reasonable doses feed the present and the future. The main thing is not to live by them, but give yourself a chance to meet the magic again.
What is nostalgia
Nostalgia is a term with 2 meanings. The first is directly related to the etymological origin of the word, composed of two parts: nostos - returning home and algos - suffering. That is literally means homesickness. The second and main meaning is used in the everyday sense: longing for events, times, places that are associated with pleasant memories.
There is another not very comprehensive, but beautiful definition of nostalgia: it is memories of the past that look more attractive than the past itself.
From a scientific point of view, nostalgic longing is not equivalent to the concept of boredom. It is rather a special kind of fundamentally important state of a person for rethinking his own life and destiny. But the dosage is very important. One thing is when memories of an idealized past give us a sense of our value in the present, another thing when nostalgic mood causes dependence on invented memories.
Nostalgia has many faces. On a scale of intensity, experiences vary from sweet sadness (on the first date, for example) to obsessive states or depression.
Facts about nostalgia:
- There is an extended concept of nostalgia: longing for the past in which a person has never lived, or even for epochs that did not exist in reality.
- According to the research, the more people live to the north, the more they are subject to nostalgia. To compete with the inhabitants of the north can only mountainous peoples.
- The concept of nostalgia as homesickness was contrasted with apodemialia (change of places). But today the concept of apodemialia is considered obsolete.
- The popular phrase "nostalgia for the past" refers to pleonasms or redundant phrases. The word "nostalgia" is translated as "longing for the past", so it should be used without further explanation.
The history of the concept of nostalgia
Attitudes towards nostalgia are affected in the works of philosophers, sacred religious books and treatises, in political ideologies. One of the modern interpretations of the Gospel Proverbs of the Prodigal Son explains that it was the homesickness and family longing that drove her son back home. Such feelings were not alien to the ancient world. Odysseus, in search of Ithaca, was extremely homesick for his native land. And in Athens, exile to other lands was considered the most cruel punishment.
Although the origin of the word is Greek, it originated in the 17th century in the Swiss dialect. While practicing in a military hospital, medical student Johann Hofer observed very real illnesses in soldiers: insomnia, arrhythmia, fever, panic attacks. But the reason was not physiological, but psychological disorders. As soon as a soldier was dismissed from service and sent home, the symptoms miraculously went away.. According to the results of observations, I. Hofer first described the phenomenon, which, as a result, called nostalgia.
Initially, the concept was used only in the special medical literature, and nostalgia was defined as a physiological disease. First of all, hired soldiers, forced to serve in other countries, yearned for their homeland. The symptoms of nostalgic disease were so severe that they led to suicide. In order not to excite once again thoughts of the native land, soldiers were forbidden to sing national songs and any mention of their native land.
When the population of the planet began to move actively to other lands, the notion of nostalgia turned into a common language. Today, the disease is no longer regarded as physiological, but as psychological, akin to depression. But in domestic terms, this phenomenon is more often used to describe the longing for the best of past times, regret about a bygone childhood, youth. If earlier nostalgia was considered life-threatening, today, to describe nostalgic experiences, pleasant words like “sweet”, “charming”, “pleasant” are more often used.
What is nostalgia in terms of modern science
Since the advent of the concept of nostalgia has been studied from the point of view of psychiatry. Today it is explored by other sciences:
In terms of psychology Nostalgia is a defense mechanism of the brain, through which a person unconsciously erases or ignores past negative memories. And the resulting "gaps" are filled with invented pleasant stories and facts. Psychologists call nostalgia sad happiness or pain of memory. We regret to realize that the past will not return, but constantly reanimate it, make it part of the present.
Nostalgia concept closely related to philosophy. The philosophical interpretation of nostalgia explains the concept as a mythical longing for a lost paradise, which in reality did not exist. It’s not for nothing that the past is associated with a beautiful country, from which we were once driven out and passionately dream of returning back. At the same time, nostalgia is considered a fundamental mood for philosophizing. Similar concepts are pessimism and melancholy.
Sociology treats nostalgia as a social phenomenon, inherent not to individuals, but to social groups. Social nostalgia is described as a universal longing for a certain ideal world. Characteristic not so much for individuals, as for large classes, clusters of a significant number of people and society as a whole. Social nostalgia as a social phenomenon is hard to miss. If in ordinary life such experiences are tormented by small communities, then during stormy changes, nostalgic torments acquire the scope of the epidemic.
People’s pleasant attachment to past experiences is active. used in advertising. There are even the terms "nostalgic marketing" or "retrospective strategy" to describe. The simple time of childhood and adolescence seems wonderful compared to the constant stresses and worries of an adult. This eternal strategy beats without a miss, because with the help of old music, stylized vintage postcards, the original packaging design, it evokes memories of youth, carefree times of romantic love or a joyful journey.
What are excessive nostalgic experiences
Controlled pleasant memories, like mild sadness, serve as a repository of positive emotions, looking into which a person becomes happier. But excessive immersion in nostalgic memories is akin to dependence: gambling, shopogolism, workaholism. In large doses, the longing for a past past does not cure, but, on the contrary, leads away from reality. Man gradually goes into the world of his own illusions in the hope of re-experiencing the pleasant moments of life.
Practicing psychoanalysts say: idealization of the past is not so dangerous, how much is a person’s hope that in the future he will meet something "from the past life". An ideal past life has the purity and integrity that the nostalgic person lacks so much today. Therefore, psychologists compare the uncontrollable nostalgia with the singing of sirens, which force us to abandon the present, questioning our future.
How to get rid of nostalgia: 3 tips psychologist
Every day we have 95% of yesterday's thoughts spinning in our heads. That is, we today are little different from us, yesterday. Another paradox of nostalgia: our brain does not remember the event itself, but the last thoughts about it. That is, we each time embellish the past more and more. So we limit our past experience with past experience.
For life to play with updated, colorful emotions, for a start, you should honestly answer the question: nostalgia what is it? just a memory or a desire to chew on greasy memories? Do I want to get high from real vivid emotions, smiles, events today?
If you are ready to let go of the past, the advice of psychologists will help you turn on a kind of time machine that will help you make a difference in life.
Tip 1. Close unfinished gestalts
Our psyche is arranged in such a way that it seeks to bring everything to its logical end. And until some task is completed, it remains in priority. Therefore, in ordinary life, the phenomenon of incomplete gestalt is similar to a frozen computer program. This may be unfinished relationships, unfulfilled promises or desires. And if there are many such tasks, then the consciousness is simply not able to concentrate on the present.
At the same time to complete all the gestalts will not work. Moreover, some may be outside the zone of your influence (insult on a deceased relative, for example). Therefore, it is worth holding a kind of inventory, reviewing your priorities and finding out the simplest unfinished events. And with difficult cases it is better to deal with a psychotherapist.
Tip 2. Work with emotions
Pleasant emotions bind us to the past. We smile when we flip through old photos, close our eyes from the memories of the first kiss. At the same time, thoughts about the present or the future cause anxiety, confusion, a sense of danger. Therefore, we consciously try to stay there. Where we were good and safe.
Work with emotions is spiritual work, which is carried out in several stages. Of course, you should not forget about pleasant events, but for memories you will have to set a rigid time frame. After you have to switch to current events. Surprisingly, sometimes a few minutes of joyful memories are enough to renew the strength for a new day.
Tip 3. Make the present more colorful than the past
As Oscar Wilde said in the book "Dorian Gray": "One of the advantages of the past is that it is the past." In reality, living in the present is much more attractive. If we regularly refer to the beautiful past, this is a bell: it's time to change. And the first thing that can be done right now: to allow today to become the first day of a new chance to live life better than you have dreamed of.
You can do anything: notice someone's smile, find a new hobby, stop sitting at home in the evening, go in for sports, go to an exhibition, start a dog, fall in love or fall in love with yourself. That is, give yourself an honest chance to open the grip of the past and enjoy this amazing opportunity to live.
Findings:
- Thanks to nostalgia, we recall the idealized past.
- Rose-colored glasses of excessive nostalgic experiences are no less dangerous than clinical addictions.
- Uncontrollable nostalgia turns into tearful sentimentality or indulging one's own weaknesses.
- Research scientists have shown: the rich are looking forward, the poor live in the past.
The easiest way to get rid of excessive experiences is to stop idealizing the past. Moreover, not everything about him was so cloudless.