Many girls dream of a stormy and impetuous romance with a confident and handsome man who will grow into true love and strong relationship.
However, it is often they who become pickup victims. A man-picker - who is he, how is he dangerous and how can he be distinguished?
Pickup - what is it?
Pickup - it is a technique of seducing girls and women, in which the psychological nuances of their stereotyped reactions in a given situation are used, the modeling of the situation itself and the behavior of a man for acquaintance, quickly turning into intimate relationships.
The goal of the pickup is to develop the relationship between a man and a woman as quickly as possible. mandatory subsequent sex.
Who is a male pick up artist and what does he do?
Pikaper or pikapshchik - this is a man who seeks to win the heart of a girlby applying certain psychological techniques. In this case, his goal - acquaintance and sex with no further obligations, the girl while becoming a victim of a kind of hunt.
You can perceive a male pickup artist in different ways - perhaps some girls will like the one-day romance.
But at the very beginning of the pickup, there is not a man’s real interest in a man, not his enthusiasm, and certainly not deep feelings, but the success of the seduction process itself. Usually after sex pikaper interest to the girl disappears, because he needs the next victim.
Often, self-confident men who resort to pickup have difficulty communicating with the opposite sex.
In this case, it can be considered as a correction of one’s own behavior, which does not carry any anti-moral actions.
However, for some men this becomes a hobby.
And from the very beginning of dating, they know that after sex they will look for another girl to seduce.
In this case, the girl herself often does not even know about the true reasons for both the dating itself and his sharp ending.
Behavior psychology
Initially, in the pickup, relations between opposite sexes are considered as a kind of battle in the ring, victory in which a man wins when entering into an intimate relationship with a girl.
For this purpose, various tools and techniques developed on the basis of NLP - neuro-linguistic programming are used.
And the essence of NLP comes down to the fact that anyone can learn more successful communication with others, to find a common language with them, and in general - to control the process of communication.
Pickup uses a conscious effect on various representative systems girls - visual, auditory, kinesthetic - with the aim of causing the required reactions.
At the same time, a girl may feel that she has found a like-minded, close person, soul mate - that is, in a short time begins to feel an interest and trust in a man.
Anchors are used - certain irritants corresponding to a certain mood, causing the desired reaction in a girl - for example, a romantic song, a walk along the embankment, where many lovers couples meet along the way, etc.
Also in the pickup is paid attention to such a concept as frame control - generalized, but not expressed directly send about a particular situation.
For example - the expression “Kolya is in shock” can not only say that a person at that moment is experiencing some kind of spiritual enthusiasm, that he is more successful than usual, but also to testify that he is amenable to some kind of weakness - for example, he did not calculate with alcohol or allowed his own misstep.
In the pickup, it is believed that the one who controls the frame, in general, has control over the course of communication.
Is it possible to recognize such a person in life?
In order not to become a victim of a pick-up artist, the girl needs to have an idea about his behavior and some of the pickup techniques.
Signs of
Is it possible to calculate a scoundrel? How does a pikaper behave?
- The seducer is well dressed. No, this does not mean that he will be dressed in a tuxedo with a bow tie, which implies a more formal relationship - on the contrary, it will be more comfortable, but ideally sitting clothes that are more conducive to rest than to official celebrations.
- Pikaper confident in himself. His actions will not be indecisive - on the contrary, the girl will rather feel herself in some whirlpool of events in which the young man will play a significant role, often initiating a walk, dinner, changing places, exchanging contacts, and the next meeting.
- Pretty soon, a pick up artist will violate the personal boundaries of the woman he chooses. This will manifest itself in touches, often very insignificant and seemingly fleeting, and yet, on a subconscious level, they make it clear that bodily contact is possible.
He will sit down closer, touch his hair or his hand - without vulgar pretensions - just to make it clear that touching one another is becoming the norm in your communication.
- Non-standard situations dating. As a rule, acquaintance with pick-ups will not begin after a long two-hour boredom at the station waiting for the train. Most likely, this will happen quickly and unexpectedly, and it is so funny that it will surely leave you pleasant emotions and a desire to continue the acquaintance. The seducers simply memorize the possibility of such acquaintances and actions under them, and stage the situations.
- You will be the center of attention of the seducer. From the very first moment you will feel a “genuine” interest in you. At the same time, he will keep himself at the center of your attention. And it will not look intrusive, more reminiscent of sincere sympathy on both sides.
- Pikaper will talk about what is interesting for youOften pretending that your hobbies are much the same.
It’s not at all necessary to talk about feelings in order to become closer to a person - it’s very similar to a simple coincidence of a hobby or the same attitude to certain things.
Reception Examples
In the arsenal of pick-ups there are a lot of standardized techniques that are used when meeting. At the same time, the meeting can be taught both by chance and caused by genuine interest in you. For example:
- A young man in the rain comes up to you with an umbrella in the rain. He looks good, does not impose himself at all in acquaintances - he is just along the way. However, immediately there is an interesting topic for conversation and a reason to continue acquaintance.
- Funny question or appeal, which implies the continuation of communication. For example - “Girl, you do not have a fountain pen? To record your phone number. ”
Pickup technology does not end with an acquaintance.
After the reason for starting the communication has been played, there is an adjustment to the values, more often it is may look completely unnoticed for girl:
- After asking about your hobby or place of work it turns out that you have a lot in common with a man - for example, he also had the same hobby, was fond of the same activity, or dreamed about what you achieved.
- When communicating on more personal topics it turns out that you have the same views on the relationship of a man and a woman. People tend to find and appreciate like-minded people, which is what pick-upers use.
Transition to touch also may look quite harmless:
- You get out of public transport and pikaper immediately gives you a hand.
This seems to be a fairly innocuous and caring gesture, but it implies that touching becomes the norm in your communication.
- The man removes the mote from your dress or hair - again, some reason for invading the personal space is necessarily used.
With the proper skill, the pickup techniques look perfectly realistic with the only difference that for a girl it will look absolutely naturalHowever, for a pikaper, this is a meaningful process of entering into trust.
How to behave with such a guy?
Correct behavior with a pick up artist means control the frame itself.
It is up to you to control the situation, and not vice versa.
For this also you should watch the situation very carefully and relationships, determine pickup tricks when capturing your location.
It is the awareness of him and your behavior that will give you trumps in the game against the male seducer.
How to remove it?
In order not to become a victim of a pickup, you should learn to keep a distance between you and a man, which he will constantly try to break:
- Do not pay attention to trying to make acquaintance with you., even if it happens quite extraordinary. Sometimes it’s enough to ask - “Do you get to know all the women?”
- Always keep your personal distance.do not let fleeting touches to you. To do this, it is enough to move aside or simply ignore the hand given by a pick up artist. This will give him to understand that you notice his attempts to touch.
With a more persistent desire to violate the boundaries of your personal space, this can be said directly.
- Do not rush to trust the person you just met.. Just remember that the revelations you told can be used against you.
- You can accept any, even the most exquisite compliments, however This does not mean that you are obliged to respond positively to the requests of the pick up artist. - for example, go somewhere or leave a phone number. Your every consent unconsciously leads you to the fact that in the future you will agree more and more thoughtlessly. Learn to say no.
- Do not be afraid to say that you categorically do not accept the rapidly developing relations. Usually this is enough to discourage the pickup artist to continue acquaintance.
How to teach?
If you are confident, and you are offended by the fact that a man is trying to use you by putting another tick for himselfyou can teach a seducer a lesson.
To do this, you can play along with the same pickup techniques. Show that you are very interested in him and that you do not notice anything unusual in the fact that relationships are developing so rapidly.
Than more naive you show yourself, the more confidently and carelessly pikaper will behave.
After he realizes that you are on his hook, simply refuse him further communication.
That refusal will be the sorest beat for a pikaperand the realization of lost time, his failure can discourage the desire to try to drag him to bed for the sake of the process of seduction.
Pickup - a set of techniques and tools that can help act in favor of a shy man who has sincere feelings for a woman, but it can also be used immorally for girls, whose main task remains to check how deep the feelings of a man are.
How bred pick up artist and womanizer? Tricks and secret chips pick ups:
