Often in the relationship between two people emerges such a thing as betrayal.
The fact of betrayal leads to conflict, the destruction of the union.
The question is - what is considered treason how to find a valid edge.
Concept
What is treason in a relationship? First you need to decide on the concept of treason.
There are two people who meet or live together.
In the process of close contact, they have certain obligations between them.
If these obligations are violated, then you can already suggest the existence of betrayal.
Betrayal, meanwhile, can be physical and moral.
- physical - intimate relationship, kisses with another person;
- moral - communication, which also involves emotions.
Treason can have one of the options, and combine both.
Defining treason, one should also be guided by the norm of permissible. For someone simple social networking, flirting with the opposite sex are already a betrayal, another person will consider that physical contact without love is acceptable and is not considered a full-fledged betrayal.
There are couples who, by virtue of their own convictions, allow connections on the side and do not consider this to be something offensive.
AT toxic relationshipAs a rule, one person loves and is emotionally dependent on a partner, the other takes liberties on the side, without considering this behavior to be wrong or immoral.
Of great importance is the internal contradiction between own attitudes and actions.
That for one person will be a betrayal, for another - just harmless entertainmentDiversifying your personal life.
Why are we looking for the second half and dare to change:
Is it a betrayal or not?
Is it possible to consider treason a full-fledged betrayal?
Or is it just a human error, especially his personality, allowing for such behavior.
If the second side severe moral, emotional, or physical harm, then betrayal can be regarded as a betrayal. In the case when the consequences are not felt too clearly, it can be attributed to a negative stressful situation.
Betrayal does not exist in the couple where the relationship has already disappeared, there is no love, marriage is on the verge of divorce. Here treason is regarded as search the other half.
Fidelity in marriage is also the preservation of health, since intimate contact increases the likelihood of sexually transmitted diseases, as well as maintaining the purity of the genus and genes.
Often the search for connections on the side regarded as compensation that something is missing in the relationship. If a person is accused of treason, he will try to instill in the partner a feeling of guilt for not paying proper attention to him.
In fact, the causes are much deeper. Even with a lack of intimate relationships, a loving and respecting spouse remains faithful or prefers to end the relationship and start a new one than to have communication on the side.
If the partner allows himself an affair, then initially there is no respect in the pairconcepts of morality, loyalty, unity.
In harmonious relationships, there is no desire to seek intimate relationships outside the union.
Considering betrayal treason or not, it is important to consider emotional component.
Yes, a person does not always have power over his feelings, but if he decides to communicate on the side, he loses respect and love for a partner, giving him negative emotions, then cheating can be regarded as betrayal.
Especially if she lasts a long time and lover or mistress became close people.
What is considered a betrayal, and what is not? Opinion psychologist:
Who is a cheater and what does it mean to change?
A cheater is a man violating certain obligations in the pair. By default, when people start a close relationship, loyalty to their partner becomes a priority.
A cheater ignores the need to be with only one person and allows himself to have connections on the side, one-time or permanent.
Fornication can happen once and never happen again. Either this becomes habitual, partners change, or a constant lover or lover appears.
In the second case, we can say that the person is a traitor. He broke the promise to be faithful, gave his regular partner feelings.
Those who decide to have extramarital affairs often do not take into account what their spouse feels, understands, suspects, that there is someone third.
As a result, irritation, aggression, depressive mood appears.
A cheater justifies his actions by saying that his partner began to treat him differently, but in fact such negative behavior and was caused by lack of loyalty.
Psychology
The psychology of female and male infidelity differs radically.
Women and men change in different ways. This is due to their psychology, stress response, cultural traditions, education.
Loyalty, as an internal quality, the installation of a person, must be instilled in childhood by parents.
Cultural characteristics are such that to the betrayal of the stronger sex more loyal. Even the upbringing itself, the example of the parents, develops in the boy the idea that it’s permissible to go to the side, to have a mistress.
As a result, men treat their own treason tolerantly and condescendingly.
For many of the stronger sex, going left is first and foremost meet physical needs and prove their worth and women's interest in him.
Having sex on the side, the husband may not feel any emotions at all.
After that he returns to his wife which she loves and appreciates, as a companion and mother of her children. The feeling of guilt may arise at the beginning, when hiking to the left has not yet become something familiar.
In the future, moral norms and experiences of conscience are erased. Caught in treason, a man can promise that he will part with his mistress, he will no longer seek outside connections. For a while this may be true. But nature and habit take their.
With women, the situation is different. Emotions come to the fore, and only then satisfaction of the physical need for contact.
Sex on the side of men often do not even consider a betrayal. However, if his partner or spouse will have an intimate relationship with another, this is perceived as a betrayal.
This manifests a sense of ownership and the prevailing view in the evolutionary process that women must remain faithful in spite of everything.
Probably, the roots of such perception come not only from moral considerations, but have a biological basis. A man must be sure that children are born from him.
At the same time, his nature is pushing him to leave behind as many of the heirs as possible. As a result, the concept of male polygamousness appeared.
What is treason for you? Psychology of adultery through the eyes of a psychologist:
What is considered adultery?
By entering into marriage, a man and a woman swear allegiance.
This means that they should not have intimate and other connections with someone other than a spouse.
Can a kiss be considered a betrayal? This is not an intimate relationship, but physical contact. For a man, a kiss, most likely, will not mean anything, although this is already the first step towards infidelity.
For a woman, a kiss has an emotional component, so it can be regarded as some form of treason.
The affair of a spouse or spouse on the side is already a betrayal, a violation of the oath of allegiance.
From a legal point of view betrayal will be considered intimate relationships on the side, single or permanent, and they can be a reason for divorce.
What does it mean?
If a husband cheats on his wife or a wife to her husband - what does this mean?
In marriage, the norm is to remain faithful to your partner, despite the circumstances provoking communication on the side.
If one of the partners decided to have an intrigue on the side, it means that there are problems in the family.
Causes of family betrayals:
- partner does not physically satisfy;
- not enough emotions;
- family life seems boring, monotonous;
- partner “tired”;
- spouse shows indifference;
- there are no unifying factors in the family for a long time; in fact, relations are in a state of discord;
- the inner “nature” of a person, which allows him to have connections on the side with ease and without agony of conscience.
If the fact of betrayal was revealed in the marriage, this is a reason to pay attention to how harmonious the relationship is, whether the partners are arranging each other sexually and emotionally.
The best way to find out the reason is to talk.
When can this be considered the norm?
Every family is a special world. with its traditions and rules.
If both partners allow communication on the side, it does not bother anyone, and the relationship may exist for a long time and even happily.
However, in this case also care should be taken not to inflict moral harm on children and children. do not form a negative family model.
If the relationship has collapsed so much that it is impossible to restore them, adultery is an acceptable way to gain moral and physical pleasure.
However, if you or a partner allow yourself to have connections on the side, you should think, and do you need such a relationship.
Treason, own or husband - is stress, a violation of the integrity of family relationships.
In this case, it is recommended to visit a psychologist, set priorities and find a painless way out from the current situation.
Where is the line beyond which treason begins? Find out from the video: