I thought that my blog needed another introductory article that would summarize my main ideas. You can read it before you decide whether my blog is worth your attention or not.
This article is also useful to those who already regularly read my blog and want to get a structured selection of my main principles. It would not be superfluous to emphasize once again the main goal of my site.
Some of my beliefs may not correspond to the generally accepted view of things. This is absolutely normal. Human society is replete with stereotypes, prejudices and false ideas that prevent people from developing and achieving happiness and harmony.
If the social structure, as well as the worldview of each individual, were based on correct principles that would meet the considerations of harmony and self-development, then society, as a whole, would be happier.
People are prevented from developing not only their innate qualities or destiny, but also their ideas and views on life.
Therefore, any desire for personal development begins with a reassessment of values. For some, my conclusions will seem obvious and even banal. And there is nothing wrong with that either. I do not strive for originality. My mission is not to surprise you. My mission is the truth.
The most valuable and wise truths are terribly banal.
But someone will disagree with my thoughts. In this case, you can read articles that are based on these provisions. These things may require some reflection, so please pay attention to them.
I am not going to shake the foundation of your worldview and criticize your values and ideals. I will simply try to destroy such ideas that prevent you from moving forward, developing and being happy. You yourself will be happy to get rid of these ideas.
I myself do not doubt the truth of my main points. Not because I just believed in them and loved them. And because they are based on the experience of my positive metamorphoses that have happened to me lately. I can deny ideas, conclusions, formulas, but I cannot deny experience.
I became happy, confident, disciplined. I got out of depression and made this site. And this is much better proof of my beliefs than any words.
Principle 1 - the goal of self-development is happiness
I put in the concept of self-development the pursuit of happiness, harmony, freedom, healthy relationships, love, sensible life choices.
The pursuit of happiness and harmony implies the improvement of such qualities as will power, awareness, moral independence, self-confidence, intelligence, patience and physical health.
In pursuit of happiness, a person moves away from suffering, anger, dissatisfaction, frustration, ignorance, envy, prejudice and depression.
The path to harmony and the movement away from suffering is the center of all my reasoning. I am not going to impose on you any other goals besides this. I will not say that your goal is to earn as much money as possible, become the most successful manager in your company and learn how to seduce women or attract men.
These things can only serve as tools for achieving happiness, and only with many reservations! They can not serve as ultimate goals.
Many people do not ask questions, but will their dizzying career make them happy? Can she save them from dissatisfaction and internal contradictions? They perceive this thing as an end in itself. Although, in my opinion, the goal of a person is one and this goal is happiness. Therefore, all other tasks in the context of self-development may interest me only as long as they serve to achieve this happiness.
I am not talking about passing pleasure, not about temporary satisfaction or passing pleasure. I mean the constant, inner state of happiness and harmony.
My site aims to help you reach this state. My task is to save you from despondency, anxiety, boredom, apathy, laziness, uncertainty about the future.
My articles are aimed at the development of the best human qualities, internal properties of a personality, and not just its external attributes.
Principle 2 - happiness is an inner state
Happiness is more dependent on your inner state than on outer things. It depends on the perception of reality, worldview, state of health, moral character, goals that you set for yourself.
It does not greatly depend on the money, the country in which you live, the view from the window of your room and the cost of your car. Undoubtedly, happiness is associated with material benefits, but not as much as many are accustomed to count.
When a person has found inner happiness, it is much easier for him to achieve the external attributes of this very happiness. In other words, it is much easier for happy people to achieve financial and social success than whiners.
And this leads to a very optimistic conclusion. Since happiness depends on our internal state, it means that after working on ourselves, we can achieve happiness. After all, it is much easier to change the internal reality than the external one.
No, I do not preach solipsism or going to nirvana. I do not urge to disconnect from the outside world and create a cozy little world inside me. I just want you to find the source of happiness, first of all, in yourself, and not do his convulsive search everywhere outside of me.
Principle 3 - Happiness can be achieved
Happiness is not an abstract idea. This is a state that can be achieved by working on yourself.
Principle 4 - Being happy is harder than being unhappy.
Suffering does not make you unique and special. Being sad is much easier than being happy. The first will not require any effort from you, but the second involves working on yourself. In more detail about this I wrote in the article how to become a happy person.
Principle - 5 - The causes of our problems in ourselves.
This principle, partly repeats and complements the principle that happiness depends on us, but this concerns not happiness as such, but human problems.
Many of the problems of man are not connected with the very properties of external reality, but with his perception of this reality.
Not all problems can be solved by changing the situation, changing love partners and new purchases. These things can only mask the problem. But to solve it, you need to change something within yourself.
Principle 6 - Passions lead to suffering.
I am not a representative of any religion. I do not believe in God. But I agree with some religious teachings that destructive desires, passions, such as envy, pride, lust, lust for power, cruelty, anger - are harmful to people and lead to suffering, dependence and lack of freedom.
Many people think that being angry, experiencing vanity is normal and natural. I do not attribute myself to these people. I am sure that passions enslave a person, deprive him of his will and sober reason and, in the end, make him unhappy.
Just like being happy is harder than being unhappy, being kind, compassionate, tolerant, strong-willed and courageous is much more difficult than being cowardly, envious, vain, lazy and angry.
In order to develop positive qualities, strength, diligence and discipline are required. Bad qualities require nothing. One has only to set a person to chance, give it to the mercy of primitive desires, submit to fate, fashion, imposed opinion and external circumstances, weaken his will, let go of his mind, as a person, strive to vice, to freedom, to suffering.
How do I share the bad qualities and the good ones? Very simple! Good qualities are those qualities whose development leads to happiness and freedom. Bad qualities, negative emotions, passions and vices pull us towards suffering and slavery.
Moreover, I believe that:
Principle 7 - you can get rid of negative emotions
Many people will say: "without black there is no white, negative emotions are a part of ourselves. If we get rid of negative emotions, then we will not be able to experience positive feelings!"
This sounds very convincing in theory, and I would have believed this statement myself, if my experience did not prove the opposite.
Since I started self-development, I began to experience less unpleasant emotions and more positive ones. I do not wear rose-colored glasses, I just became less susceptible to stress and negative effects of others. I pay more attention to the good sides of life than to the bad ones. My mood is always high, and I feel great!
I believe that destructive passions are not part of our true self. These emotions can be controlled. It is also possible to get rid of them.
Principle 8 - Man is responsible for who he is.
Each person chooses the path of their own development. The fact that a person is unhappy, ignorant, lazy, unlucky is mainly his fault, not his parents, not his country, not his surroundings.
Taking full responsibility for yourself is a courageous act. But to someone he may seem desperate, because, at first glance, he leads to endless self-incrimination.
No, to take responsibility for yourself, this does not mean constantly scolding yourself in all failures and being disheartened because of your own imperfection.
To stop blaming external circumstances for everything, it means to realize that:
Principle 9 - A person can change himself
If we ourselves are responsible for what we are, it means that we can independently determine what our development will be, and not throw it into the will of fate!
From a bit cruel, at first glance, the concept of personal responsibility, the life-affirming and inspiring idea of personal freedom is derived!
We ourselves can change ourselves, despite the innate characteristics!
The opinion of the innate predestination of our character, in my opinion, is too exaggerated. A person is really born with some given set of parameters, but these parameters do not so strongly determine his development, as many used to think.
There are no people lazy, ambitious, emotional by nature. Most personality traits are formed during life. Many of our personality traits, which we consider to be innate, are in fact only habits that each of us can destroy if we make enough effort.
All of us are not perfect, but each of us can change, become something better. I believe that every person, regardless of his innate characteristics, has the potential for self-development.
Read more about this in my article Myth 1 - You cannot change your personality.
Principle 10 - Self-development - it is difficult.
My site is not a collection of ready-made ideas, having learned that, you will immediately find the desired happiness and freedom. Self-development is not easy. It involves a lot of work done, practice. The one who offers quick ways to achieve harmony is most likely a charlatan.
There are no quick ways of self-improvement. The path of self-development is a constant work and struggle. In this fight you will often defeat. Not everything comes right away.
I can help you break down the stereotypes that prevent you from developing, directing you to the right thoughts and teaching effective practices.
I give an initial impetus, but you have to do the rest of the work yourself. I can not force you to do something, I can not guarantee that everything will be easy. Much depends on you.
Conclusion
These principles are the basis of all my reasoning and thoughts presented in the form of articles on this blog. Briefly, they can be summarized in the following formulation. The purpose of self-development of the individual is individual and general happiness. Happiness as well as the misfortune of each of us depends on us. We decide ourselves whether we are happy or unhappy, clever or stupid, lazy or disciplined. We have the freedom to make ourselves people of whom we want to see ourselves.
These principles set general guidelines, and the answers to questions about how to achieve happiness, what work is about yourself, how to develop your best qualities, how to get rid of suffering, you can see in articles on my blog.
