An awkward silence, misunderstandings, accidental or even deliberate insults and the final break - this is what threatens the inability to properly select topics. What to talk about on the first date so as to avoid negative consequences? How to make a good impression, open your interlocutor?
The rules of good form, a list of relevant issues and prohibitions - in this article.
How to ask questions on a date
In how a person asks questions, his manners, ability to communicate, level of culture are displayed. Accordingly, the attitude towards the narrator will differ depending on his communication skills. Below are recommendations on how to properly ask the other party about something.
| Recommendation | Wrong | Right |
|---|---|---|
| Avoid interrogations | "What is your profession? Like? What is the experience? ”. | "What do you do? (wait for an answer) Please tell us in more detail. It is very interesting to me". |
| Dilute phrases with emotions | “Do you like poetry? Hmm, I see… ". | “Do you like poetry? Awesome! You must be a very refined person. I like it". |
| Use different types of questions |
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| Less dryness, more romance | “Why go on dates? Why one / one? ”. | “You have an amazing appearance, a pleasant character, how did it happen that you do not have a pair yet?”. |
| Respect opponent's opinion, avoid condemnation |
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What to say on a date - 50 questions
Hobbies and interests
- What do you like to do in your free time? For some reason it seems to me that you are a person with a whole bunch of hobbies.
- What do you usually do when you are sad / lonely / want to have fun?
- What is the difference between your leisure time in winter and summer?
- Do you like this place? Or do you prefer others? Which ones?
- What is your favorite kitchen? Is there a favorite dish?
- The time of the battle of the century! Books or a movie, a club or an evening at home, tea or coffee - what will you choose? Why?
- Who or what is the source of inspiration, motivation for you?
- Playing or playing any video games? What do you like, repel?
- If there were no money in the world, what would you do?
- Describe your ideal partner. How did these expectations come about?
A look into the past
- If you had the opportunity to change one event from the past, then what would be the situation and how would you change it (a)?
- In your life, have you ever felt like you were in the seventh heaven?
- What events made you change your interests, revise your own perception of the world?
- Do you have a favorite photo? Describe it, please.
- What did you dream about as a child? How was your childhood?
- When were you most scared? What or who made you come to your senses?
- What age of already experienced years do you consider the happiest or most successful?
- Do you believe in the secret meaning of dreams? Have you ever had prophetic dreams?
- What is the best gift in your opinion? And what presents did you give?
- Compare yourself now and 5 years ago. What changed?
Life and routine
- Who are your biorhythms - owl, lark, dove? What time do you feel most active?
- How do your weekdays usually go? And the weekend?
- How often do you see friends, how much time do you spend with them?
- What do you prefer to eat for breakfast, lunch, dinner? Do you follow a particular diet or love spontaneity?
- Do you have any pets? What kind? Would you like more?
- Are you a schedule person or a person improvisation? How often are your plans violated?
- Have you ever sang in the shower or in the kitchen? What were these songs? Did you do it (a) because you just liked it, because of a good mood or some event?
- Do you like to receive guests? And go to visit? Why?
- What housework is your most unloved? And what seems to you an easy duty?
- Does it happen that you work at home? Which room is easier for you to do?
Future and ambitions
- How do you want to live in 5 years? In 10 or 20? Who do you see yourself?
- What age do you think is optimal for creating a family and why?
- What is your fondest dream? What do you think, how can you achieve it?
- What sphere of your own life or yourself would you like to develop more?
- What would you like to learn new? What is the reason for this desire?
- If you were offered to change something all over the world, what would it be?
- If you had an unlimited supply of money, what would you spend at the beginning?
- If you were the firm’s boss, what business would that be? How many subordinates would be at your disposal?
- Would you like to emigrate somewhere? Travel? What countries or cities?
- What event or period of life are you looking forward to?
Character and temperament
- Are you a jealous person? What can make you jealous - a mere trifle or a direct fact, supported by strong evidence?
- Do you like risk, feeling of excitement? Or do you prefer safety, reliability, rationality, do you like to weigh the pros and cons?
- Is it difficult for you to express emotions, to trust people? How fast are you getting on with new acquaintances?
- What can make you angry in just a second? How often are you angry or annoyed?
- How often do you laugh? How do you endure problems - do you try to think them over, turn them into a joke, or do you take them too close to your heart?
- Are you a sensitive person? What can make you cry? Have you ever felt that when watching a movie on a touching moment, emotions took over?
- Imagine a situation: you buy goods in a store, come home and notice a barely noticeable and completely reparable defect on it. Will you change your purchase, buy a new thing or try to fix a marriage on your own?
- How do you prefer to solve conflicts with loved ones? Are you trying to leave and cool down, are you trying to immediately discuss the problem, or do you allow emotions both to yourself and to the interlocutor?
- Do you have phobias or just fears? Have you ever tried to overcome them? If so, how?
- Did you have bad habits that you could get rid of? What remained? Is there a desire to fight them?
What topics on a date is best avoided
Even applying the rules of etiquette, using the latest discoveries of psychology, you can get into an awkward situation if you touch the wrong questions. The list of topics that it is better not to recall, not only on the first, but also on the second and third dates:
- politics, economics, government, official affairs;
- religious issues, its historical aspect;
- former relationships, negative qualities of ex-partners;
- money, earnings, social status associated with them;
- health problems or difficulties that the interviewee did not ask about;
- personal achievements often and in a boastful style.
In order not to worry and not invent on the go, what to talk about on the first date, it is better to read the article several times. This will allow you to well remember the possible topics, consolidate the knowledge of what is desirable to avoid. It is not necessary to ask all the questions or voice them strictly in the order in which they are submitted. It is enough to identify some of the most important pieces for yourself and memorize a couple of extra ones just in case.
