Love is a wonderful feeling when another person fills our life with meaning, causes a storm of positive emotions, gives us strength. But what if loved one is far away?
Do two people in such a situation have a chance of happiness? Relationships at a distance - the advice of a psychologist how to be and what to do with love when its object is far away.
Is there love at a distance?
What is love at a distance? How it's called?
Love at a distance, at which two people who have tender feelings for each other, but are unable to see each other in reality, called virtual.
Since love is a very personal, intimate feeling, everyone has the right to express his own opinion on this issue, which will be true for him.
However, it is possible to operate with insensitive statistical data - 3.7% of people in Russia are in a relationship at a distance, and in the United States this figure is even higher - 4.3%.
What it is:
- How is it to feel a person at a distance? There is such an expression - soul affinity. At the same time, it is not at all necessary to see a person in reality in order to experience empathy towards him, that is, to empathize. Mentally, we can appeal to a person, carry his image in imagination, which literally gives the sensations of his constant presence.
- Are relationships possible at a distance? Such relationships are possible, as we experience emotions from communicating with another person, reading or listening to his words. Moreover, such an influence may well be mutual.
- Can a man or woman love at a distance? Sometimes a surge of feelings in virtual communication is so great that people understand that they have fallen in love. And while quite often the partner answers the same.
Is it possible to meet at a distance? Meetings at a distance are virtual. Most often, this communication in messengers - correspondence, calls or video calls. They replace dates in reality.- Is love on the phone at a distance? Some people just have to hear a voice in order to have deep feelings. In fact, this is not so supernatural - we pick up a lot of intonations, changes in the tone of voice, we hear the words of support we need, compliments, tips - the range of emotions caused by the voice is very large.
Is it possible to meet at a distance? Meetings at a distance are virtual. Most often, this communication in messengers - correspondence, calls or video calls. They replace dates in reality.Are relationships possible and how to build them? Find out from the video:
Psychology
The most important feature of relationships at a distance is that there is no opportunity to feel a real person - the object of love will always be mostly present only in the imagination.
it the biggest difficulty virtual love - there is no opportunity to touch the partner, no kisses, hugs, sex - all that we expect only from a loved one.
Therefore, such a relationship can cause a feeling of lack of fulfillment - an understanding that love cannot manifest itself in its entirety.
Is separation killing feelings?
Is it true that distance kills love? Or is love checked by distance?
It cannot be said that the power of love is inversely proportional to the number of kilometers between lovers - couples who have the opportunity to see each other every day, too, leave.
It will be more true to regard the absence of the possibility of meetings, as a temporary difficulty that should be experienced together.
How long does love last?
Love, due to the release of the corresponding hormones, the so-called "chemistry" - lasts from 3 months to two years. And only after that can we talk about mature love to each other.
If people are really close spiritually, then they will need each other after the transition of feeling into a quiet phase.
Relationships at a distance. How to understand if your relationship has a future:
How to communicate properly away from each other?
How to behave so as to withstand the test of distance? Psychological advice on what to do:
- How to behave in a relationship at a distance? It should behave as naturally as possible - as if the beloved person is really next. It is the maintenance of the illusion of presence that makes love at a distance possible.
Ask how your afternoon has gone - without fear of going into details, and also be sure to share everything that is happening to you, any experience that caused you to heartily - even if it is a common household trifle. This way you allow your loved one to better see your life, which he also needs. - How to tie a man / woman at a distance? Talk about your emotions - this is the only thing that keeps you together at the moment. Feel free to express your feelings - trust the most intimate things that you have. Write poems, if you can, talk about love in prose, quote famous statements - this will in any case cause a response in the soul of your partner. Be open.
Ask how your afternoon has gone - without fear of going into details, and also be sure to share everything that is happening to you, any experience that caused you to heartily - even if it is a common household trifle. This way you allow your loved one to better see your life, which he also needs.Be attentive to your loved one - do not forget about important dates, especially those that have a special meaning for him.
Be interested in his feelings, mood, well-being - all that causes him emotions. Try to share them with him.
How to keep love at a distance? Useful tips:
How to maintain such a relationship?
How not to lose this connection? First of all, you should be prepared for the fact that some time you will be unable to see each other. Both partners must understand and accept this.
Talk about your fears and negative feelings that relate to your relationship - do not be afraid to appear weak, looking for support.
Your experiences are required will find a response in the soul of a loving person and also say that the fate of your relationship you care.
Keep in touch in any case. You need to understand that refusal to call or forward a message, correlated with real life, is tantamount to silence or ignoring the meeting.
Encourage each other. You can say that it is hard for you to love from a distance - this is quite natural, but this does not mean at all that you will not stand it. The partner must be confident in the strength of your feelings.
How to diversify communication?
How to strengthen relationships at a distance? Over time, there may be such a situation that the number of topics for conversation will run out. This can lead to a feeling of monotony.
How to bring freshness to relationships at a distance, revive them and make them more interesting for each other?
- Read together any artwork.. This is a whole store of emotions and impressions that you can discuss together. Share your perception of characters, views on the situation, predict the possible end of the work. This way you can get to know each other better.
Send each other gifts if possible. In today's world there are plenty of ways to make pleasant surprises - send each other gifts from online stores, buy tickets for concerts, write out magazines.- Communicate with different people on social networks or on forums. This will create the effect that you are present in the company, so to speak, a joint “appearance”. Also at the same time you will see how different your loved one's communication with you and other people.
- Play with each other in the game. And the rules may apply to your communication - you can come up with and discuss them yourself. For example, spend a day or two without making love confessions - surely you will have enough feelings to show them more ardently than usual.
- Do virtual walks for each other - for example, in a city park or some other place.
- Record video messages to each other. - for example, you can send a pre-prepared message before you cannot get in touch for a while.
- Be each other's eyes and ears - allow your loved one to see as much as possible the world in which you live. Fortunately, modern means of communication can do this.
- Surf the web together - visit shops, entertainment sites, share your impressions.
Send each other gifts if possible. In today's world there are plenty of ways to make pleasant surprises - send each other gifts from online stores, buy tickets for concerts, write out magazines.Be as open as possible to your loved one - sincere emotions will always find a review in another heart.
Books
The writers also could not bypass the situation, which many people fall into.
Here is several books about love relationships at a distance:
- "I do not believe. I do not hope. I love" S. Ahern. The book of several hundred letters fit 50 years of the life of its main characters;
- "Where are you?" Mark Levy. A psychological drama about how children's friendship turned into true love, followed by separation;
- "The Loneliness of Primes" by P. Giordano. The story of two lovers living in a huge metropolis and their parallel destinies, who are not destined to cross;
- "Loneliness in the network" Yanush Vishnevsky. Heroes correspond in Internet chat rooms, exchange frank fantasies. But the most important test will be their meeting.
Examples of life stories
Life is full of love stories in the distance.
As a vivid example, the relations of V. Vysotsky and M. Vlady can be cited. The Iron Curtain between the USSR and the Western countries did not allow spouses to be together.
Sometimes the only thing they could afford - write letters and talk on the phone. So was born the famous song Vysotsky telephonist.
Relationships of V. Bryusov and N. Petrovskaya also deserve attention - for more than 10 years they communicated by correspondence, living in different countries.
These letters were published after their death and are now examples of the epistolary genre.
A heart-tearing life story - how deep can a feeling be? which does not even kill the separation. It is enough to quote one phrase of N. Petrovskaya - “I always think about love”.
Love at a distance is a test for two. However, it is precisely the difficulties that often prove the true depth of feelings.
Relationships at a distance - personal experience:
