Love is not always a pleasure, and often people have to say goodbye to each other, despite the strong mutual feeling. How to say goodbye to the person you love, and can you step over a strong feeling for your own good?
Let go with gratitude: how not to keep anger on a partner
Many people decide to break at the moment when the relationship comes to a standstill, and the number of mutual claims exceeds the number of advantages of a partner. However, mutual insults and accusations - that can kill on the vine not only love, but all that is human in a partner. The most painful wounds are inflicted by one who was truly close, which means that one should not harbor hatred, because it will only blacken the heart.
Psychologists give the following tips to end the relationship without too much anger:
- you need to talk with your partner again, discuss the reasons for separation and explain that no offense and mutual accusations will follow;
- further on a piece of paper you need to write down all the advantages of a partner, positive moments in the relationship;
- you should not block memories of happy joint days, because by closing your memory, a person loses both experience and vital energy;
- to let go of a partner without anger, you need to imagine how happy he will be in the future, but with someone else.
True love is so different from the feeling of the far-fetched that it gives the possibility of forgiveness. A person does not feel angry at a soul mate for parting. Rather, on the contrary, he lets go of his partner with a light heart, anticipating that in the future they will both find true love.
The pinnacle of respect for each other is the ability to part so that in the future we will be happy for the personal success of our partner. Psychologists note that such a positive, peaceful separation is not always possible. Sometimes the grievance inflicted on the lover is so strong that the flow of anger and accusation is simply unstoppable. Such a reaction is a response to the suffering caused, and it is difficult to restrain it, but you still have to try.
Creativity, as a way to cope with love failure
When a person is forced to let go of someone he loves, his heart is filled with such an incredible longing that creative impulses simply cannot be restrained. How to let go of the man whom you love so that the sufferings are not in vain and turned into creative impulses?
- First, a person needs to find a path in which he is strong (literature, music, painting).
- Next, you need to spend for your creative activity the maximum amount of time, pouring on paper all that boiled in the shower.
- There is no need to restrain creative impulses, but nevertheless written verses or pictures should not be evil, they should not bring only pessimistic thoughts.
- A person should communicate with like-minded people, go to creative conferences, finding in art the way to escape from suffering.
Creativity can really heal a wounded soul with love, but this does not mean that you need to write angry tirades about betrayal. Love is a very bright feeling, and therefore, in order to release the soul mate, it is necessary to create positive, philosophical works about what has been experienced. In the end, any experience brings something good to a person’s life.
The main advice that psychologists give at this stage is to stop perceiving separation as the end of the world. Yes, the relationship ended, and perhaps they did not exist at all, and the person fed his emotions not only with mutual sympathy, but the world is not limited to one partner. Perhaps, already at the next turn of a person, the very feeling that is capable of changing his life for the best is waiting.
5 major mistakes when experiencing parting
Sometimes it is very difficult to part with those who are so dear to the heart, but this has to be done. In such situations, a person sometimes makes annoying mistakes, and here are 5 of the worst of them:
- the unfortunate lover convinces himself that the resurrection of the senses is possible, and that the partner is bound to return;
- a person reproaches himself, those around him and his soul mate because of what happened, giving the world only a negative;
- abandoned sufferer trying to deal with grief through a bottle or drugs;
- a person stops believing in love and closes his heart for new feelings;
- an unhappy lover loses interest in the world and his career, making his future even more bleak.
Psychologists are advised to stop seeing parting in a negative way, because in the future it can bring joy to the life of a person. You should not refuse to meet with friends, go to the cinema and travel, because thanks to all this you can unwind, forget about the heartache and open up to the world.
Sometimes a person makes another fatal mistake - he stops believing in love. Psychologists say that many men and women do not manage to build harmonious relationships due to the fact that once they were very disappointed in their feelings. This oppressive feeling of depression, the fear of being humiliated again and deceived, is so strong that the unfortunate puts a psychological barrier, not allowing even those who can warm it to their hearts.
Thinking over how to let go of the one you love, a person sometimes wonders, not knowing how to heal the soul, while retaining the belief in love. In fact, it’s enough to take parting in a positive way and not try to convince yourself of a possible resurrection of love. If life already divorced two people, then you should at least try to preserve the light that was in this relationship.