No married couple is complete without quarrels and strife. As psychologists say, "only people who are absolutely indifferent to each other do not quarrel." Naturally, in such situations, the majority of spouses come to the forefront of emotions, each begins to disassemble in detail who is right and who should ask forgiveness, who will remain in his opinion, and who will be forced to compromise. As a result, people themselves do not notice how, in search of a solution to the conflict, they are driving themselves into a deep abyss, giving rise to more and more aggression.
After all, if you look at the problem carefully, it does not matter who is right and who is to blame. Even the cause of contention is not important, because the end result still doesn’t determine it. The only thing that decides the outcome of a given quarrel is the desire of both parties to reconcile.
Accept your wrong is not easy. Many people, even realizing their own mistakes, still, by inertia, continue to prove the opposite, fearing to make concessions and pass for a weak-minded person. In fact, this is how they emphasize their weak character even more, because only the strong in spirit of the personality can put up with defeat.
Even in spite of this, a true indicator of the moral strength of a person, whether man or woman, is his ability to accept the wrongfulness of another. Forgive him for being wrong, give a person a chance to improve. Far from many are capable of this. It is much easier for the majority to accuse or even search for charges, just not to forgive. And this is one of the factors, the fault of which the statistics of the divorce proceedings leaves much to be desired every year.
So how can a person force himself to stop and think about his actions in a fit of rage and shouts at his beloved person? There is one simple but effective way.
They say that people begin to appreciate loved ones only when they lose. Alas, it is true. It so happened that our life is very unpredictable. Every day things happen to people that neither they nor their loved ones expect. And it gives a reason to think: is it worth quarreling with your loved one about and without any reason, if he can disappear at any moment, and the last conversation with him that remains in memory will contain only reproaches and accusations? Is it worth it? If at least for a second imagine such a situation during another skirmish with a loved one or loved one, then the cause of the quarrel will seem so insignificant and stupid that any desire to continue it will disappear.
No little things in life can compensate for the love and trust of a loved one. Any conflict can be avoided by going to an elementary human concession and forgiveness. This is not as difficult to do as it seems, but the result is not long in coming. Good emotions can always prevail over bad emotions. It is important only the ability to direct them to a useful course.
Evgenia, Moscow region
