The question arose: why give birth to children?
Let's see if each person really need to leave behind offspring.
Why do people need children?
Child is procreation.
It is believed that women have maternal instinct, even if she has not yet become a mother.
Evolution has adapted us in such a way that we strive leave offspring.
Unconsciously, we understand that humanity must continue to live, and therefore, it is necessary to have children.
it high goalswhich many do not think about, but they are kind of sewn into our genes.
In addition to the preservation of humanity on Earth, there are personal reasons why people want to have children.
For a woman - the realization of the instinct of motherhood. If you have given birth to a child, it means that you are worth something. For a man, sow his seed, leave his genes.
Why and for what give birth?
The birth of a child is accompanied enough great difficulties. Starting from the need to take care of health, ending with the material issue of providing for the family.
However, even couples who do not have high earnings, still decide on the birth of a child.
Main reasons:
- self-realization maternity and paternity;
- so requires society. At the state level there is propaganda and stimulation of the birth of children. They put pressure on the young couple and relatives: as without children, the family must be with children;
- all give birth and I give birth - complexes about the fact that all the friends, friends have children, it means that I need;
- I want to leave behind Mark on historyor rather, to introduce one's own genotype into the development of mankind - this need may be unconscious;
- so that in old age there was someone to take care of you - quite a selfish need, but many decide to have a child precisely because they are afraid of being alone in their old age;
- because it happened - among the children born, a large number of random conceptions;
- acquiring mother or father status prove to society and yourselfthat is able to become a parent;
- attempt to hold male or female;
- "Continuation of yourself" - an attempt to be realized in what did not take place itself.
Does every woman have to become a mother?
Do I have to give birth to children? Is it really necessary to have a baby? You are oppressed by society, husband, parents, but you internally resist and do not want to be a mother.
If you look at the percentage of unwanted children and the attitude of parents to them, then you can see that the occurrence of postpartum depression in this case is higher than if the child is desired.
Not all women present maternal instinct. Sometimes it does not appear even after the birth of the baby.
This is not good, and not bad, but simply a personality trait.
So this woman can realize yourself in other activities, and it is not necessary that she should have a baby.
Children should be desired, then they are loved.
At what age is it better to acquire offspring?
Menstruation begins in girls from 12-13 years old, but this does not at all mean that she is ready for conception. Unfortunately, statistics of recent years is disappointing, and more and more underage mothers are found.
There is a reverse trend - women who decide to give birth after 35 years, when they achieve high earnings, take place in their careers.
However, we must remember that the older the woman, the greater the risk for her and the baby. This is especially true of those who have the first birth.
A girl giving birth to 20 years should understand what changes will happen in her lifeincluding social. It is likely that you will have to leave school or take an academic leave, go on maternity leave, taking a break in your career.
At the age of 18, children most often turn out to be unplanned, and not all parents are psychologically ready for the appearance of their child.
By the age of 25 people already mature enough, is able to set goals and implement them.
Time between 20 and 30 years most favorably for the appearance of children - the body is still strong, health allows, and the salary, as is correct, is already acceptable for the child.
Should I have a child for myself?
Not every woman successfully married. It so happens that she is already 30, 35, and family life has not developed. A woman wants a child, and the question arises: whether to give birth to yourself.
It is important to assess their capabilities. No one but you will provide this child financially.
If you need to leave him with someone, you will not have to ask your husband, but your mother, girlfriend, or hire a nanny.
It’s worth giving birth to yourself if you are completely sure that be able to raise and provide a child. No one decides for you - it is necessary or not necessary. If the father of the child refuses to participate in education, and you want to leave him, then it is your right.
Do I need to give birth to save the marriage, to keep a man?
The great delusion of many women is that, having given birth to a child, they thereby keep a man close to him.
In men, the instinct of providing offspring is not so developed.
For them, more important is the fact of the birth of the child, and not the need to raise it.
A very small percentage of men remain in the family precisely because the child was born. And this does not guarantee that when the baby grows up, the man will not leave anyway.
Moreover, dysfunctional family atmospherewhen parents do not like each other, negatively affects the development of children.
Psychology of large families
Why do some give birth to many children? An interesting fact is that often give birth to many children of the family. with low income and low social status.
Perhaps it’s about the ability to correctly plan their future and the future of children.
Every child is high financial costs, but some families do not think about it, the fact of its birth is important to them.
The reasons for the emergence of large families:
- a couple just loves children and wants to have them as much as possible;
- unwillingness, inability to use contraceptives, and in families with low social status the fact of the need to be protected is simply ignored;
- desire to get benefits and compensation;
- self-realization - a non-working housewife wants to embody herself in at least something, in this case, the birth and upbringing of children;
- leave the world as much as possible offspring, contribute to the gene pool;
- the family is well off, so they can afford to have several children.
Good reasons for not having children, according to psychologists
There are reasons why a child giving birth is not worth it:
- Diseasesthat can be passed to the child.
- Psychical deviations, especially if they are observed in the mother, but also the paternal genes can be transmitted.
- Lack of maternal instinct. It happens that he appears after the baby is born, but if you already have one child, and you feel coldness and irritation towards him, then consider whether it is necessary to give birth to the next one.
- Do not give birth just because conform to public opinion or because the husband or relatives so want.
A woman herself has the right to decide whether she is ready to become a mother and whether she needs it.
- Just for the sake of so that in old age "there was someone to file a glass of water". Children feel the selfish attitude of their parents. If your child was born only to satisfy your needs, then chances are disappointing. Unfortunately, many pensioners, even having given birth to children, remain almost alone in old age.
- If you have too low income. A child requires material investments from the first days of his life. Are you ready for the fact that your children will live in poverty? Will you be able to step over your social level and earn enough so that the children do not need anything and get a decent education? These questions could be criticized if there were not so many dysfunctional families in the world.
- If you value your freedom, then the child will almost certainly tie you up. Not many people who have the opportunity to hire a nanny, but in this case, the child should receive a sufficient portion of maternal love and attention.
- Pregnancy, childbirth take health. If you are physically weak, have chronic diseases, then it is worth thinking about the risks and consequences for your body. There are diagnoses in which pregnancy can carry a certain danger to life. That is why it is important to pass a full examination before conception in order to exclude various risks.
- If one of the partners is categorically against. The family is kept on mutual agreement. Happy children are born in a happy marriage.
Who are childfree?
Childfree - It is an ideology, a movement characterized by a conscious unwillingness to have children. In translation, the term means "free from children", appeared quite recently, approximately in the 70s of the last century.
The people of this social movement are convinced that they do not need children, they do not want to have them for certain reasons.
The term was coined to distinguish those who cannot have children for health reasons from those who voluntarily refuses to give birth to offspring.
Why do people make such a choice. Conventionally, childfree can be divided into two types:
- people, not loving childrenwho dislike them;
- practical related to their lifewho consider that children can simply hinder them, restrict their freedom, while they are tolerant of the children themselves. For this type of people, a bright, not burdened with responsibility and constraints life is more important.
Childfrey may not give birth to children for a variety of reasons:
- career - it is more important than the need to spend several years at home, caring for the baby, losing the skills and social status;
- personal freedom - people just do not want to limit it;
- self-doubt, child injuries - this category does not want to have a child, fearing that it will not be able to bear responsibility for it, bring up, contain;
- fears - undermine their health, have a child with disabilities and health problems;
- think that the modern world is too dangerous and unstable, to start a child - war, bad ecology, crime.
In any case, life without children is a person’s personal choice, and no one has the right to condemn him.
Forecast and consequences for childless
Choosing to give birth or not a child, it is necessary to understand what threatens the absence of children:
- not satisfied with the instinct of motherhood and fatherhood. Sooner or later there may come a time when you finally want a child, but for age and health it will be too late;
- in old age you are left without support;
- if you do not want to have children, and the spouse wants, then there is a risk of destruction of marriage.
Women have much less time to become a mother than men to become a father.
The term of a woman is limited, while most men are capable of fertilization until old age, and if the husband now says that he does not want a child, this does not mean that he will not have this desire in the future.
To give birth or not - it must be a conscious choice, careful planning. An occasional child can also become loved, but still better when he is born at the right time and at the request of both parents.
Why have children? Opinion psychologists:
