The problem of unrequited love is as old as the world, and more often women suffer from it: after all, the weaker sex on the planet is statistically more, and emotionally they are more vulnerable than men.
It often happens that a woman becomes attached to a man first, begins to feel warm feelings for him, and he remains cold. What is the problem? Why do men often do not reciprocate? And how to fall in love with a man for real?
The content of the article:
How to behave when meeting
How to continue the relationship
Psychologist's comment
Acquaintance
How to fall in love with a man? The main rule to follow is to behave correctly from the very beginning. Even at the stage of dating, a man creates an image in his head that he can like or not, therefore it is important to initially seem attractive to him.
To achieve this goal you should use some tips. Taking into account these recommendations on the behavior when meeting, you can like almost any man.
- Be feminine. Let it be trite, but many modern women tend to seem strong and independent, while men subconsciously are drawn to softer women who want to be protected. Therefore, you need to monitor your behavior and speech: gestures should be smooth, graceful movements (to achieve the best effect, you can sign up for dancing), speech should not contain swear words, voice does not need to be raised. This rule also applies to appearance: sociologists and psychologists have long proved that men prefer feminine silhouettes that emphasize body curves (dresses with an open neckline, blouses and skirts). Pay attention to the perfume, they should not be too harsh.
- Be open, but remain mysterious - stick to the golden mean. Men do not like closed women, but at the same time they do not want to hear revelations about your past, at least at the stage of dating. Intrigue in relationships always attracts, so at first do not answer too personal questions, it will only excite your fan.
- Be self-sufficient. An educated woman who is engaged in constant self-development, has her own interests, always attracts men to herself. It is necessary to live a full life: communicate with friends, have a favorite hobby, go out into the light. If a man sees that you are happy, then he will certainly want to become part of your interesting life.
Relations
If you managed to "hook" a man, then your acquaintance will smoothly flow into a series of romantic dates. This stage of the relationship is no less important, so do not relax. The first three tips are the basic principles of successful, happy relationships, so they should always be respected.
In order for love to turn into a real, strong feeling, you need to make some effort for this. So, what is needed for a man to love you?
- Watch your appearance. If you live together, this is not a reason to look untidy. Get comfortable and beautiful home clothes in which you will always look sexy. In the morning, take care of your hairstyle. Men love their eyes, so you must look great to always maintain his feelings.
- Show interest in his life. If he enthusiastically tells you about the device of the carburetor, you should not defiantly yawn and look at the clock. Listen to him, maybe this information will come in handy in the future. Ask him questions, let him feel like a guru, a source of knowledge that you have no idea about.
- Praise your man. Every person wants his merits to be appreciated, and men are no exception. If your chosen one has hammered a nail or repaired a crane, be sure to praise him: firstly, he will be pleased, and secondly, next time he will gladly do something else useful to please you.
- Maintain comfort. Tasty food and a clean home are a guarantee that a man will always rush home from work. If the house is not cleaned, and the refrigerator is empty, then even the biggest passion will fade away in a short time.
- Be creative, take a healthy initiative. This applies to both hanging out and sexual relations. Only here you need not to overdo it: try to listen to the wishes of your partner, find a reasonable compromise, do not impose your opinion.
- Respect each other’s private space. You must understand that it is impossible to stay together all the time. For a healthy relationship, it is sometimes useful to be separate: relax alone or meet friends. Give a man a chance to get bored.
Finally, I would like to highlight one of the most important foundations of love relationships: trust each other. The main condition for the preservation of love is mutual trust. You can not torment a man with jealousy, especially if he does not give a reason for it.
If you notice that he is paying attention to other women or, in general, have evidence of his betrayal, then it is worthwhile to think carefully whether you need such a partner before attempting to keep him. Forcibly cute will not.
Olesya, Troitsk
Psychologist comment:
So, the author of the article asks about how to fall in love with a man, and tells us about it.
I will begin from the very beginning and, perhaps, quite categorically: I do not like the name of the article and, accordingly, its intention. The article gives me a legitimate professional question: why fall in love with a man? In order to increase your self-esteem at the expense of victory? Or in order to prove to someone significant (mom, ex) that you can? Or in order to finally start a relationship (after all, "it is time")?
There can be a lot of different options. But for any of them, achieving the goal will bring maximum temporary pleasure, but not inner satisfaction. To "fall in love with a man" means to manipulate his feelings and actions. And to manipulate a partner from the very beginning of a relationship is to undermine one of the important foundations of love, which, as the author correctly noted, is trust.
Therefore, I propose to look at the problem from a different angle and try to answer the question "How to find a woman's happiness?". Each person is individual, has his own particular preferences, expectations, feelings, experience, etc., and at the same time he wants to find the person he needs. And here the law is pretty simple:
To find the right person, it is important to start yourself to become the right person.
And here we return to the indisputable truth in psychology: you want to change your relationships with men, change yourself, your behavior and your attitude to what is happening. Now you can return to some of the recommendations from the article, but with a number of "reservations":
- Be feminine. But it is important to be, and not to seem. If you put a mask on yourself, then one day you will have to take it off, disappointing your partner, or be tormented all your life, realizing that your partner loves the image you invented, not you.
- Be open. Retaining mystery makes sense only during the first acquaintance. If you want to build a long-term relationship, be honest with your partner.
- Be self-sufficient. BUT do not forget to show that you need love, affection and care. Why else would an iron lady be a man ?!
- Watch your appearance, but rather take care of yourself. You do care about those you love ?! BUT don't set the bar to "always look great." This again brings us back to the idea of a mask (see "be feminine").
- Show interest in life: both your own and other people. It will make you spiritually richer and more self-sufficient. In addition, being sincerely interested in someone else, you give this person an invaluable resource - faith in yourself.
- Take care of people. Caring can be expressed in many different ways: with help, and cooking, and cleaning, and support, and sincere questions, and the right gifts, etc. etc. Be sure to find a comfortable way for you, because caring is another manifestation of love.
And now imagine yourself feminine, open, self-sufficient (but not demonstratively independent), caring, well-groomed, interested (in life, in men, in pleasure), initiative and inspiring woman. How long do you think she will be without a partner?
Unless, of course, she will not sit at home for seven locks. But that's another story ...
Consultant Psychologist Ksenia Terentyeva
