Love and relationship

What is pickup and training for men

Pickup is a relatively new, and quite rapidly gaining points popularity movement. The term itself, which emerged in 1995 after the famous forum held by Sergey Ogurtsov with the intriguing name RU.PICKUP, is translated quite simply: pick up - acquaintance.

The basis of the practices of the pickup is the centuries-old experience of the relations of the sexes, and the art of seduction, without which it would hardly be possible to continue life on earth. And the very first and most successful pickup can be considered Eva Adam's proposal for the ill-fated apple.

From among the famous real and fictional characters, the most successful pick-up artists can be considered Casanova, James Bond and the hero of Russian jokes - Lieutenant Rzhevsky.

However, it would be a mistake to speak of a modern pickup only as a theory and practice of seducing an intended victim. Today's pickup is more of a scientifically based practice of personal development, allowing to significantly increase the attractiveness of a pickup artist for the representatives (representatives) of the opposite sex.

The founder of the first school pickup is considered to be the author who appeared on the shelves in 1992 and immediately became a popular guide "How to drag into bed ..." - Ross jeffreys. The book was intended for men and contained a number of practical instructions that could speed up the moment of acquaintance with a girl, to seize her attention, and, ultimately, as the name implies bestseller, - to drag her to bed.

However, since many of the provisions proposed by Jeffreys pickup theory were revised and supplemented many times. The very look at the object of the pickup truck has changed, and the concept of "ecological friendliness" of relations has appeared, implying the inadmissibility of the attitude towards the opposite sex, only as an object of manipulation that can cause serious psychological trauma.

Now there are numerous pickup theories.

At the same time, professional pick-up training offers a complete system of theoretical and practical approaches to knowledge and skills.

There are more and more new school pickup, there was a kind of pick-up terminology. Among the most famous school pickup: American Speed ​​Seduction, based on Jeffreys' first creation, Mystery's 3 based on Markovik’s theory about the importance of “showing” a high value subject or just DHV, RSD school, supporting the views of the famous pick-up trainer TD (the pseudonym of the idea's author - Owen Cook). The C & F school is quite popular, in which the views of the jolly DeAngelo remain the most popular on the theory and practice of pickup.

There is also a school of domestic pickup with the intriguing name RMES. Domestic pickup masters avoid extremes, intelligently combining the technology of several foreign schools at once. The main idea proposed by RMES and successfully picked up by many foreign schools is the theory of 120 points.

Theory of 120 balls.

In accordance with its provisions, for the lady who evaluates a man, 6 parameters are most important. This is the general appearance, pithiness and manner of conversation chosen by the man, his internal state, the place he currently occupies in the social pyramid and his immediate surroundings.

In this case, the significance of the parameters in each individual case may vary, but all of them are certainly taken into account. Thus, each man can assess his own attractiveness for women on the basis of the 6 parameters indicated, evaluating himself on a 20-point scale at each point. If you managed to score 120 points - in the eyes of every woman you are irresistible.

Domestic school pickup also offered the so-called 3M model. Or model 3 dates: dating itself, to interest a girl, or on the other, the charm of a companion on the second and the very seduction on the third.

However, no matter how diverse pickup theoryToday, its essence comes down to the main point: not a single theory will work without careful work on oneself, one’s way, habits, judgments and erudition.

It is worth adding that the pickup has ceased to be exclusively male passion. Around the world, more and more female pickup schools are opening.

Who are pikapery?

Many are firmly convinced that pick up artist - just a pitiful, embittered loser who has learned several techniques of seduction, a cynical consumer. This is a scoundrel who considers all the girls to be something like talking dolls from a sex shop, from which one wants to stay away.

The second pole is perfect pick up artist. A person whose interests are not limited to only “sports seduction,” a diversified and developing personality. He uses the basics of a pickup truck for "peaceful" purposes; there is a place in his life for a deep, sincere relationship.

Particular difficulties arise because an experienced pikaper, regardless of his proximity to either of the two poles, can act very subtly, so that the “target” does not suspect a trick.

The task of the pick-up artist is to convince a woman that she is deeply in love with him, so charming, and that he needs a woman more than she needs him. But aerobatics mastery of skill - in the same way to convince a woman that this relationship is completely unnecessary to her when they cease to interest a successful hunter.

If you view a lot of ads on the set for pick-up trainings, then they all look completely harmless and attractive. Indeed, is it so bad that an unsure young man will get rid of some kind of complexes and finally decide to approach the girl she likes? Is it bad that the guy will start to monitor his own appearance and health, learn the basics of flirting, that the loser will turn into a successful person and take from life what he needs for happiness?

In fact, the world of pickup is not so clear.

Any idea that is the brightest and most humane can be vulgarized, turned inside out, which actually happened. Among the creators of the Picardian technician, there were also people with different views on life and the relations between the sexes. In different schools of the pickup, different values ​​are put in the forefront - from dating to girls, seduction techniques in the purest, most primitive form, to serious work on their own personal growth. Moreover, everyone who comes to the courses sets his goals.

Pikaperskie trainings and courses work as a kind of "developer" of the true essence of man.

Not far away, notorious guys go to study, hoping that after successful completion of the courses the whole world will be at their feet. However, man is a lazy creature. There are not so many real diamonds among graduates of the Pickers courses who are imbued with the basic idea of ​​a pickup: to become an interesting person. Why work if there are effective, practically trouble-free methods in the reserve? Just use them and get pleasure from life without any obligations. Such people further apply manipulation techniques rather clumsily and discredit the entire pickup movement. Many ignore the clause about the most painless rupture of relations, which also does not add to the attractiveness of the average pick-up artist.

Another problem to which the pick-ups have a very indirect relationship. Demand stimulates supply and not all courses convey to their students the very idea of ​​personal growth. The vast majority of beginner seducers, it is simply not interesting. Even in cases where the guy sincerely wants to change and change life for the better, it does not always work. Yes, a person gets the skill to quickly make an impression, to have to himself, to achieve a girlfriend, but he does not represent how to develop relationships.

Pickup - a very good and useful tool for making relationships, but not a panacea or a magic wand. If a man is looking for deep sincere relations and is ready to work on them - pickup techniques will benefit both parties. If a man is ready only to receive, without giving anything in return, he is hostile towards women - a useful tool will sooner or later work against him.

Pickup trainings without neck "secret".

Against the background of all this diversity, the so-called men's training. Already one name can cause curiosity. What is, according to the authors of these trainings, "to be a man"? To learn about it, you can start to get acquainted with at least one of the advertisements. It turns out that this is nothing more and nothing less than "being able to improve relations with a woman." In itself, this is a good thing, because knowing and, most importantly, understanding what the opposite sex wants, at least, will not hurt. Moreover, observations show that it is vital for some.

But is it worth it to reduce all male qualities only to the relations between the sexes?

After all, there are other areas of life where it is impossible to manage without the manifestation of male qualities. For example, parenting, relationships with parents, work, finally. And everywhere you need to be strong. But for some reason this is not taught. But it is known that if a man shows himself strong in these areas, then women's attention is provided to him.

As for the "clean" pickup trainingsthen they are all aimed only at seduction, they are very rarely spoken about developing relationships. Visiting them, you need to remember that not only men read books on a pickup. So some of the "techniques", worked out on such trainings, may be already well known to the opposite side for a long time and simply "do not work". Even at the right time and right place.

However, the “philosophy” of such trainings seems somewhat doubtful. As a rule, she represents the girl in the form of a "safe that needs to be hacked" with the help of some clever tricks. On the one hand, the glory of the “great seducer” can greatly raise the self-esteem of a particular individual, but, on the other, it is hardly worth starting a relationship with deception and manipulation. Usually this does not lead to anything good. However, does not prevent to visit pickup training and to those who are divorced or on the verge of breaking relationships. However, an exemplary family man in the men's pickup training has nothing to do. Do not spend time on such additional "training" and people with adequate self-esteem.

In a special group can be identified men's training personal strength.

They are believed to be able to help acquire brutality, become more confident and penetrative, but in this case there may be a danger that the closest associates will no longer understand such a "macho" There are often cases when a graduate of such trainings begins to apply their new skills to everyone who inadvertently turn up under his brutal hand. That is why before attending such classes you should always set yourself a specific goal.

Who might need pickup trainings?

First of all, young people who do not have enough courage to go up and meet a girl. The most interesting thing is that many of them believe that to do this you need to know some magic word whether to possess, if not sex appeal, then, at least, a creative sense of humor. Not necessarily. Why dress up in other people's clothes and nervously roll their shoulders, feeling that the "suit" is sitting badly? But to create a hero from what is, just a good pick-up training will help.

There are certain categories of people who attend trainings simply out of interest or just to learn something new and get fresh impressions. In this case, of course, attending trainings can be of some benefit.

Well, like any market phenomenon, pick-up trainings are aimed at satisfying certain requests. Some have such requests, while others do not. That is why the question of the need to attend trainings everyone must decide for himself. But at the same time it is necessary to preserve the sobriety of thinking and to show a share of healthy skepticism. Only in this case, one can hope that visiting pick-up trainings will give the desired result and make life more interesting.

Secrets of men's training

You will not find any trainer on the site, but up to 50% of the participants leave without any results at all, another 40% get a temporary result during the training, under the pressure of motivation of the presenter and the caliper. But after the end, quickly return to normal. And only a few acquire the desired skills. Why is this happening?

The main method of such courses is coercion, under the guidance of coaches, to step over their complexes, barriers, to do what one does not want to move through fear, crossing it. Some try to work at a deeper level, but in view of the short time, they simply are not able to achieve the desired result and fully train seduction and flirting.

Preparation for training for men.

Therefore, it is worth starting with identifying those internal constraints that make it difficult to become successful. Of course it's perfect to do the guidance of a psychologistbut not everyone decides on this. An independent process is usually longer, but a lot of information on this topic is now open, and if you wish, you can find everything. Or just search psychological training to identify and remove limiting beliefs. After that, you can work on self-esteem or in general personal growth.

All this, in one way or another, is also given at the very training for men, but in order to absorb, or as the trainers themselves say, to embed changes - time is needed. And during the course, this time just will not be.

On the trainings for men do not give a "magic pill".

Everything training is hard work above yourself, above your fears. But the most important moment is not the fact of overcoming this fear, which will make you somehow make it, but the awareness of where these problems came from, what false beliefs were the prerequisites for the emergence of this fear. Only by accepting it can you get rid of fear.

As for the choice, which of the pick-up trainings is suitable, there are several tips. The leader himself should impress you. The fact is that during the classes there is a copying of the trainer's behavior, and this is quite difficult to do if it is unpleasant to you. In addition, of course affects the experience of such events. The number of assistants, or as they are called calipers, is of great importance.

After all, they will motivate you and monitor the implementation of the exercises. Therefore, it is worth asking how many people there will be and how many people are in a group. The normal ratio will be no more than five participants per one assistant.

And if you properly prepare for this event, choose the best option for you. male trainingand, most importantly, pass it in a good mood, completing all the tasks - then everything will work out!

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