Often a woman wonders how can she stop being jealous of her beloved boyfriend or husband? Psychologist tips in this situation, sometimes, are necessary.
This article describes the situations in which you need to consult a psychologist in person and get such advice.
Where does this feeling come from?
What causes jealousy in women?
Most often, women's jealousy comes from self-doubt.
A woman who believes that she is so badthat a man will choose another one at any moment, begins to be jealous of him.
This condition is not normal.
What is it dangerous?
Women's jealousy is dangerous in that leads to the destruction of relationships. No man will long tolerate this attitude of distrust.
After all, many women in a state of jealousy begin to check the personal messages of their beloved, rummage through his things, roll tantrums in any situation.
For example, a jealous woman may begin to make trouble if she finds a long hair in a loved one's car. And it does not matter that man brought up a colleague.
Mistrust, scandals, and a strong transition of personal boundaries adversely affect relationships. Sooner or later, the man will end such a relationship.
How to get rid of jealousy for her husband?
Blind jealousy of the spouse
In case you jealous of your lover to everyone, it is worth pondering over their self-esteem. Why do you think you are worse than all other women? If a man chose you and is in this relationship, is it really all other women better?
Is a man so uncontrolled that he is ready to change from the first counter? If such reflections do not help and you still cannot cope with jealousy, you can turn to psychotherapy.
A specialist will help handle low self esteem and increase self-confidence. After this pathological jealousy will come to naught.
The consequences of his betrayal
How to stop suspecting a man after treason?
If the man has changed, then try understand the reasons for such a betrayal.
It is worth remembering that very often a man who has changed once, will change further. Thus, it is worth thinking about maintaining such a relationship.
If a I don't want to stop the relationshipIt is worth turning to psychotherapy for both. That work with a specialist will give an understanding of the causes of treason and help get rid of jealousy.
His hated ex-wife
If a man has children from his first marriage, then communication with his ex-wife is normal and usually consists in joint child care.
It should be understood that the man has already left this relationship and left for a reason. Most likely, he will not return to them anymore. Moreover, if he has already found a new relationship.
To feel more confident, it is worth talking to a man, asking, why did they split up. To think and not to repeat mistakes.
On the other hand, it’s not worth trying to be better than his ex-wife. Do not exceed it. It is important to remember that a man is unlikely to respond positively to such a competition.
But if a man communicates with his ex-wife, but they have no childrenthen it is worth asking him about the reasons for such communication. This is some reason for jealousy.
Is it possible to overcome jealousy of the family from the past marriage? Psychologist will reveal the topic in this video:
Spends time with a child from a previous marriage
It is important to understand that children are not competitors to women. Children, in principle, are not to blame for the fact that their parents broke up. Sometimes, it is difficult for a woman to accept her husband's children from her first marriage.
But here it is worth making a choice for yourself. If a woman understands that this is a man with the past, her right to accept such a man or not. If a decision is made to start a relationship with a man, then it is important to take the man along with his children.
Probably, it's worth discussing timewhen the father will communicate with his children in person, go with them somewhere.
In any case, children are an integral part of a man’s life and they need their father.
You can also try to become a friend of these childrenspending some time with them. But here it is important to keep a distance, do not try to replace his mother.
Family or friends?
You should pay attention to how much time the husband spends with friends. Maybe jealousy here is not superfluous? If the husband daily, instead of walking to his beloved wife, hangs out with friends in bars or goes to visit, it is important to convey to him the idea that you are a family.
It is important to talk to your husband that his attention is important to you. If he then does not reduce the amount of communication with friends to a minimum and does not begin to devote more time to you, you should reconsider this relationship.
What if the husband spends more time with friends and not with his family? Psychologist tips:
Omnipresent mother in law
Here, too, should work on relationships. Many men start behaving in such a way that compare their wife with mom. And at this moment to begin to be jealous quite naturally. It is important for a young couple to live separately from their parents.
It is important to understand that you are now one family, separate from the families of the parents.
If the husband begins to compare his wife with his mother, then this, of course, is not a healthy relationship.
If this is the situation that arose in the family, it is worth trying to convey to the husband the idea that You are not pleased with this attitude on his part. Most importantly, communicate information calmly, without crying.
If the husband has not changed his relationship and continues to compare you with his mother in her favor, it is worth reconsidering his relationship with this man, to see if he is needed, if he can't start living apart from mom and it is constantly present in your life.
How to win mother in law? Psychologist recommendations:
How to overcome jealousy for a guy?
Suddenly he loves ex-girlfriend?
It is important to note such a moment. Often with former stop talking.
If a guy with an ex-girlfriend does not bind anything, but they continue to communicate, it is worth thinking about, and if she was?
If they are connected by some common cause, for example, they study in the same group, work in the same office, work in the same team, you just have to look at these relationships. It is important to understand do they communicate outside of work issues.
Most often, such communication does not occur.
If in your case this is the case, then it is worth understanding that everyone in life there is a past.
Now the guy is with you, not with her. If for some reason he stopped the relationship with her, it was obviously not just that.
There are usually serious reasons to end the relationship. Does he want to come back to her? To calm you can ask about the reasons for separation. Ask if her boyfriend still loves how he feels.
If he does not love her, then you should not be upset and aggravate the situation. It is unlikely that he will leave it to her. But just out of the relationship can leave, if you start very jealous of him.
The former is still mine!
Here it is worth applying the method checked by people. People say: "Out of sight, out of mind". And in these words there is a lot of truth.
If you stop communicating with the guy with whom you broke up, he will eventually be forgotten.
In this case, do not forget to keep social networks. For example, very great helps keeping instagram. Often people begin to travel in order to post new photos.
It is not necessary to go on a trip to another country. Sometimes, it is enough just to look more closely at your city on the subject of attractions that have not yet been photographed.
Just Instagram allows you to observe the most interesting shots, allows distract from your ex-boyfriend.
After a few weeks of doing something interesting, it will be difficult not only to be jealous of the ex-boyfriend, but his name will not be easy to remember.
Jealous of everyone
It is important to work with your emotions. Answer your question what exactly are you afraid of? Why are you jealous? Are you afraid that he will go to another woman? If so, for what reason?
Is this other woman better than you? But the guy chose you exactly the one that you have. Will he leave the one he chose on his own? Hardly.
It is likely that you are afraid of what a man will change for you. In this case, it is important to talk to him, discuss this moment.
Sometimes a person who is guilty without a vein, just goes and does something for which he has already been scolded. That is why it is important to remember that sometimes it is precisely the scandals about adultery that can push a man into treason.
If you can’t handle your emotions, it’s worth seek help from a psychotherapist. Working with a psychotherapist will help increase self-esteem and begin to trust your boyfriend.
Are the friends of a young man more important than me?
It is important to understand that he had friends before you met him and he has the right to spend time with them.
See if you have a girlfriend? Do you communicate with them?
A guy doesn't have to spend all the time with you at all, such a relationship will soon get bored.
If he left to chat with his friends, maybe it is worth spending the vacant time with his friends? In addition, you can find something to your liking for as long as the guy is busy chatting with friends.
But here again it is important to understand the line. Sometimes a guy spends with friends in general all the time, not spending time with his girlfriend. And this should already be a reason to talk with him. Maybe the relationship is not important to him?
How to learn to trust your loved one?
Think about the causes of mistrust. YOU think he will change you? And why exactly he can change? If familiarity with this guy is long and you know the facts of his betrayal in the past, it is important to think about will he change in this relationshipwhether we need a relationship with him at all.
If it seems that you are not good enough for a relationship, that he will definitely meet a woman who will be better and go to her, then it is worth working on self-esteem.
Most likely, you should contact a psychotherapist who will help raise self-esteem, improve your attitude towards yourself. After self-esteem is raised, jealousy will go away and trust will come to the guy. Sometimes, it is difficult to resolve such issues on your own.
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Tormented by love for a married man
There is still a very big question: is it worth it to mess with such a man. At a minimum, he is deceiving his wife, and he can start deceiving his mistress. If, nevertheless, it is decided to start such relationships or not to terminate them, it is important to understand why they are needed.
A woman can agree to this relationship solely for the sake of sex, not wanting a more intimate, romantic relationship. Then she should not be worried about what the lover does outside the relationship with her.
If jealousy, yet begins on such conditions, maybe there is a lot of his wife in this relationship?
Maybe coming to his mistress, a man mentally stays with his wife?
Tells how good she is and what she cooked today? It is worth it to pull up, if he loves his wife, let her return.
In some cases, the woman agrees to a relationship with a married man in order to take him out of the family. And, of course, jealous of him. If this is your situation, then it is important to understand that nothing good will come of such a relationship.
If he is so easy to betray and ready to run away to the first mistress, then he is from his mistress, who has become his wife, also easily run off to the next mistress. In this case, do not be jealous, it is necessary to end the relationship.
Is it worth reconsidering the relationship?
Of course, it is worth reviewing your feelings if jealousy has arisen. After all jealousy does not always arise from scratch.
It is important to keep in touch with your partner, without hysterics, tell him about your feelings, forgive him to change behavior, if necessary. In some cases, which are described in the article, the relationship should stop altogether.
As we see, jealousy does not always appear by chance, sometimes it happens that there is a reason for it. It is important to understand when there is reason for jealousy, and when it is not and you need to work independently on your feelings. Have a successful relationship!
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