Psychology

How to pull yourself together: effective methods and the commentary of the psychologist

Keeping calm, always and everywhere, regardless of the interlocutor's actions, is a true art that is not subject to even the most restrained people. Sometimes the emotions are going wild, and therefore the stream of abuse and tears pours onto the others. How to pull yourself together when the situation gets out of control, and what advice do psychologists give on this issue?

How to pull yourself together and calm down: 5 most effective techniques

Before you lose your temper, making a scandal, a person must understand why the situation has such a strong influence on him. Psychologists say that most often people lose their temper under the influence of truth or some revealed facts that turn their worldview upside down.

If the interlocutor notices the flaws of the person that he himself is trying to hide, if the boss gives the cherished position to another candidate, if the lover makes a scandal - an explosion in such situations simply cannot be avoided! To prevent the situation from getting out of control, psychologists advise using the following effective methods:

  • count to 10, preferably with eyes closed, allowing the brain to calm down and analyze the consequences of the information received;
  • to distract from the irritating factor to the surrounding nature, to a passer-by or to one’s own thoughts;
  • turn on the music and immerse yourself in its relaxing tacts;
  • start breathing deeply for 1-2 minutes, trying to let go of the alarming situation;
  • get away from the conversation and annoying interlocutor.

The latter technique should be used only in cases where other methods of self-control are of no effect. Most often, psychologists advise to distract from the annoying factor for something else, do not forget about deep breathing and a score of up to ten.

Often, the interlocutor specifically tries to ruffle the hot-tempered person to show the instability of his psyche. In such cases, it is necessary to analyze the consequences of their absurd behavior. Often, one tantrum turns into global problems at work and at home, and the attacker, who brings the nervous interlocutor off his head, will obviously remain pleased with the result.

Ways to curb the character

Some people all their lives trying to learn how to pull themselves together and calm down, while others can not be completely unbalanced. External factors prove to be an inactive weapon against such calm personalities. Psychologists explain this different attitude to irritating factors by the type of character. What types of character stand out in modern psychology?

  1. Choleric - the most hot-tempered, emotional people who can lose their temper because of every little thing. They find it difficult to control their emotions, which affects their personal lives and career achievements.
  2. Sanguine people are emotional people who have a little more resistance to external factors than choleric people. They have a light disposition, but sometimes they take troubles and difficult situations too close to heart.
  3. Phlegmatic people with a stable psyche who rarely lose their temper. Such personalities are calm and prudent.
  4. Melancholic - depressive personality, often in a decadent state of mind. Morally vulnerable, but extremely rarely showing their temper.

The hardest thing to cope with the overwhelming emotions of choleric and sanguine. And if sanguine people can still let go of a controversial situation, then choleric people will surely make a tantrum with shouts and fights. What is the best way to pull yourself together in such hot-tempered, expressive people? Psychologists usually give the following tips:

  • meditation becomes the main assistant of an emotional person, because with its help one can learn to control one’s emotions;
  • Tired choleric person is more susceptible to external influence, so you should follow the perfect balance of work and rest;
  • parents from childhood need to teach choleric and sanguine people to correctly perceive the criticism and trouble that will invariably occur to him in adult life;
  • people with an unstable emotional system need to find something that relaxes them in order to skillfully relieve tension at the end of each working day.

If meditation and self-programming are useless, it is recommended to sign up for special courses on anger management. Psychologists say that due to constant tension, pressure from society and their own social circle, people are increasingly losing control of themselves. In order for flashes of rage not to interfere with normal life, it is necessary to learn how to control them. Here the professional psychologist and independent work on character are involved.

Even the most emotional choleric can control himself in a difficult situation, analyzing the consequences of his aggression in time.

Pull yourself together: the worst ways of self-control

Some psychologists advise people with an unstable emotional background to ignore external stimuli, silently coping with existing problems. That's just to pull yourself together under the yoke of problems, and even without consequences for the psyche it can sometimes be difficult. That is why an emotional person always needs to speak out. Without pouring this stream of problems into the world, he will feel unhappy and constantly angry. That's just to talk about annoying factors you need either with a specialist, or with true friends.

Another wrong advice is to take out the overwhelming aggression on inanimate objects. Such advice often leads to the fact that choleric and sanguine people smash everything that comes their way, including valuable items. An excellent way out of the situation will be boxing or any kind of struggle. Pokolotiv pear, a person can forget about everything that annoyed him, once again taking control of their emotions.

It is not recommended to stifle the flow of anger with alcohol, drugs or smoking. Perhaps this will help calm down for a minute, but it will cause great damage to the physical health of the body.

Starting control over excessive temper is needed since childhood. If a child seems too aggressive and emotional, his outbursts should be stopped. Heart-to-heart talk with parents will help identify future problems in the bud, preventing the emotional instability of an adult.

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