Emotions are an integral part of human nature, it is they who make us human, show that we have feelings.
Most importantly, they can be used to determine what a person feels at the moment.
But not always emotional expression is a plus. You need to be able to control your emotions and feelings. Let's find out how to do this.
Self control
Why does not everyone have the ability to control their emotions?
Every person has emotions and feelings. They are of two kinds: positive and negative.
But it is not always necessary to ardently and vividly express them, even positive ones, not to mention the second form. Sometimes it is inappropriate, it can badly affect relationships, work, etc.
Therefore, it is important to learn how to control yourself and manage your emotions. But as practice shows, this is not so easy.
Not everyone can boast immaculate self-control and full control over the situation. After all, we are all different and our reactions are also different. Not everyone can immediately pull themselves together and hide what they feel at the moment.
But it is necessary not only to learn to mask and control emotions, but it is important not to accumulate them and not to break into others.
To achieve the result, it is worthwhile to practice special techniques that will help even the one who, as they say, "Everything is written on the face".
Emotional regulation of behavior - what is it?
What is this concept in psychology?
Our emotions lead us to certain behavior patterns.
Each different emotions may appear differently, but the meaning remains the same.
This or that emotion will seem to be expressed in all. This is called a stereotypical form of behavior.
Behavior regulation is due to emotions, but at the same time, it exists in opposition to the same emotions. All volitional deeds are accomplished contrary to human emotions, all actions are done in spite of any feelings and sensations.
What a person will have a lower level of this self-regulation, the more his emotions will take hold of him. That is, emotional regulation of behavior is the ability to control oneself, no matter what.
How to learn to restrain your emotions and feelings?
To learn to control your emotions and feelings, you need to master certain techniques that with regular workouts will give a positive result.
Anger considered the strongest human emotion, it destroys everything in its path. Anger destroys a person not only from the inside, but can also harm relationships with others.
But you can restrain your emotions if you know how.
First of all, you need to be ready for attacks. Forewarned is forearmed. Ask yourself an installation for the future that an unpleasant situation may arise, think in advance how to behave in such a situation.- No need to accumulate anger in yourself. Express what does not suit you. In no case is in rude form. Solve all conflicts, talk about it.
- It is always worth discussing what you are not happy with.but remember to do it in a civilized way.
- When emotions are going wild, you need to use breathing techniques, namely concentrate on your breathing.
- Try to abstract from the situation., look at it on the other hand, look at yourself on the other hand, you may not like your behavior and you will reconsider some of your words and emotions.
- Remember some positive moment from your life, mentally transfer to your happiest moment.
First of all, you need to be ready for attacks. Forewarned is forearmed. Ask yourself an installation for the future that an unpleasant situation may arise, think in advance how to behave in such a situation.Ways and techniques of self-regulation
We are all human and we all have emotions. But sometimes these emotions are significantly complicate our lives.
One cannot restrain one's feelings all the time, the accumulation of negative emotions is fraught with bad consequences not only for health, but also for close people.
For example, if every time someone at work causes a solid negative, he accumulates and once the anger turns into real anger, which is not very good. Also, a person who is in constant stress, can break on close people.
So that negative emotions do not greatly affect life, you need to learn how to see them, and then live with them wisely and let goso that they do not carry anything bad in your life and are not displayed on relationships and health.
You can not "swallow" all that makes you unhappy, that changes your mood for the worse. Therefore, it is important to learn self-regulation.
This will help certain ways that are directed to ensure that people I learned how to control my emotional state.
Training
Now there is a huge variety of lectures, trainings and seminarsthat are aimed at self-regulation of the emotional state.
Such events are usually held by people who have a positive experience in this matter. Different trainings can have a different program, it all depends on the person who conducts it.
But they have one common goal - teach the audience to independently control their emotions, to manage them correctly.
Usually the training begins with an introduction, it may be a small lecture, voicing the main questions that need to be answered. Then everyone gets to know each other, introduces himself can even talk about their problem and how it keeps them from living.
Next is practical part.
It is filled with various gamesthat will help people practice their emotional state.
During practice, all participants can be divided into several teams, if conditions so require.
Emotion management techniques
Some people find it very difficult to control their emotions or at least to manage them correctly. But you need to do this, because not everyone loves excessive emotionality.
Often, people who find it difficult to control their emotions find it difficult to work in a team, especially for those whose work is closely connected with society.
Such activities require a lot of emotional costs. But feelings are not always positive, therefore extra negative is desirable to keep with you and not show it.
How to cope with yourself at the right time?
Body level
Body level control:
Deep breathing technique - it is known that breathing is directly related to the nerves, so proper breathing exercises will help in controlling yourself. Back in childhood, parents often say that if you are worried or worried, you need to take a deep breath and also breathe out. The same applies to managing your emotions. The easiest way is to simply move away to a secluded place, sit down, close your eyes and count to 4, take 4 to take a deep breath through your nose, then also on the count of 4 take a deep breath out through your mouth.- Muscle stress relief - Excellent technique, especially if the feeling of anger and anger seizes. The most effective way is to tighten your fists as tightly as possible. Hold in this position until there is no strength left and fingers begin to relax on their own.
This technique is good because you do not need to run and hide, to make it, it is enough to hide at least one fist.
Deep breathing technique - it is known that breathing is directly related to the nerves, so proper breathing exercises will help in controlling yourself. Back in childhood, parents often say that if you are worried or worried, you need to take a deep breath and also breathe out. The same applies to managing your emotions. The easiest way is to simply move away to a secluded place, sit down, close your eyes and count to 4, take 4 to take a deep breath through your nose, then also on the count of 4 take a deep breath out through your mouth.At the level of consciousness
The most effective way is to "pause a conversation." If there are feelings of irritation, anger, anger, etc., then the best option would be just ask to postpone the conversation for a while.
Thereby, you can gain time for yourself in order to think things over, calm down and find the right words.
Application of imagination
Techniques by which imagination is applied:
Our imagination is considered to be quite a powerful weapon in the fight against the control of emotions, it gives unlimited space:
Technique "Arrows" - if the interlocutor says unpleasant information, you can imagine that arrows are coming from him and flying in your direction, but the armor is on you, which these arrows do not miss, they bounce off you and fall. But here it is worth being careful, and you can skip important information.- Technique "Look at yourself from the side" - during a conversation, it is worthwhile to concentrate and try to see yourself from the side. Imagine how you look, how you express your emotions, how your hands are shaking. You will be unpleasantly surprised, so you should calm down, think carefully before you speak and do something. Thoughts should be in the spirit: “This conversation is unpleasant for me, I begin to get angry, my breathing quickens, and my voice rises. Need to pull yourself together, normalize breathing. Everything, I calmed down, everything is fine. "
Technique "Arrows" - if the interlocutor says unpleasant information, you can imagine that arrows are coming from him and flying in your direction, but the armor is on you, which these arrows do not miss, they bounce off you and fall. But here it is worth being careful, and you can skip important information.External control
There are situations when the feelings are just going wild and it becomes difficult to restrain them.
If there is a leaf on hand, then you can tear it into small pieces, squeeze or knead, in general, do something that soothes you.
If there is no possibility to do this manipulation, then you can draw some abstract pictures in a notebook, while trying to press on the pen / pencil as much as possible. Only it is worth trying to do it as imperceptibly as possible for your interlocutor.
Maybe, you can calm what you love. For example, you can drink your favorite drink, eat a snack or listen to music. In general, do what makes you a little happier, which always uplifting.
Exercises
During unpleasant situations, a person usually “writes on his face” his attitude towards the circumstances.
The voice usually changes, hands tremble, breathing becomes faster, it becomes fussy, etc.
It is known that emotional and physical condition is interconnected. Therefore, it is necessary to control both.
- Muscles - the most common and effective way is to relax the muscles of the face. One must learn to relax the facial muscles and be able to control it during an unpleasant situation. Of course, it’s not enough for anyone to do it the first time, so it’s worthwhile to exercise in advance. To control your muscles, you need to take turns to relax this or that group. It is necessary to alternate, that is, strain, and then relax. In this case, you need to be as focused as possible and think through every movement, engage in self-suggestion.
Over time, develop such a mask, which automatically "appear" on the face.
- Breath - It is important not only to “own” a person, but also to control breathing. Here, too, may need training. You need to level your breathing, you can sit on a chair, close your eyes and put your hands on your knees, it is important to focus on breathing. A few minutes you just need to control inhale / exhale, think about each breath / exhale, slow down the process. It is important that when breathing nothing helps, the shoulders should not be involved in the process, it is better to bring them back. You can also close your eyes and breathe slowly for a minute, at the same time you should direct all your thoughts and focus on your breathing, control its rhythm and frequency. Rhythmic breathing also helps. After a slow breath, you need to read up to 6, make pauses and exhale after. Need to set the rhythm. Exercise to perform a few minutes.
Visualization - helps to create certain images in the mind that help control yourself. A fairly common exercise is called "Imagination of the plot." During an unpleasant situation, mentally you need to “paint over” every moment in a certain color. To all this, you should add the imagination of a certain space, for example, the sea, a large hall, a square, etc. All this symbolizes calm. It is important to try as much as possible to feel "there". You can also practice simulating yourself in a tense situation and try to achieve success. It is worth doing this in the morning and concentrating well, and the most important thing is to tune in to a positive result.You can perform in front of a mirror or ask someone to reproduce the situation in real time.
Visualization - helps to create certain images in the mind that help control yourself. A fairly common exercise is called "Imagination of the plot." During an unpleasant situation, mentally you need to “paint over” every moment in a certain color. To all this, you should add the imagination of a certain space, for example, the sea, a large hall, a square, etc. All this symbolizes calm. It is important to try as much as possible to feel "there". You can also practice simulating yourself in a tense situation and try to achieve success. It is worth doing this in the morning and concentrating well, and the most important thing is to tune in to a positive result.If it is hard to control your emotional state, then this can be easily learned. A number of special techniques and exercises will help everyone. to be more restrained in your emotions or, on the contrary, to show them more.
How to learn to control emotions, and not to succumb to provocations:
