There are moments in life when a woman clearly understands: “I don’t need anyone at all.” This is not a complaint to a friend or a complaint to her husband. This is her inner voice, which means her thoughts are sincere, and the pain is enormous. The feeling of being useless can occur regardless of age, financial security, number of acquaintances, family availability. At such moments, an emptiness is formed inside, and you do not see how to remedy the situation.
The germ of this sensation, as a rule, is formed in childhood. If the parents were too busy with a career or personal life and did not give the child enough time, he could not talk to them, consult - already at that moment he realized that no one needed him, and this feeling was firmly seated inside. Then different situations can occur - job loss, divorce, and all these emotions come back. If your problem has the same roots - try to analyze the situation. You know your parents loved you. Perhaps they simply could not find a way to express their love, tenderness, care.
What to do?
In fact, there is a way out and not even one. First, do you really feel the need to be needed? What does this need mean to you?
Many people live, enjoy life, satisfy their own needs, fulfill their own desires and are happy with it. These people are self-sufficient, they do not need the love of others, do not need to confirm their own importance. Some may call them selfish - but what's the difference? In reality, being alone is inevitable. After all, sooner or later the children will grow up and leave for their home, and there is no guarantee that the partner will not fail.
So the most important thing a person can have is to learn to appreciate and be grateful for the moments of solitude that fate gives. After all, it is an opportunity to devote time to yourself, your interests, and development. All you need is to properly use the opportunities that appear.
If this option does not suit you, then there remains another thing - to become necessary: to take the first step, to help solve someone’s problem, to be there, when you need it, to develop yourself. The problem of a person who does not develop relationships with others, may be lurking in him. Have you seen a lot of cheerful, cheerful people who are not needed by anyone?
At the same time, gloomy and reticent people do not cause the desire to communicate with them, because with all their appearance they show that they do not want to make contact. A person who smiles always attracts others. No wonder - after all, it seems to those around him that he has no problems, and they want to join this atmosphere of carelessness.
In fact, everything could be different: everyone has problems, difficult situations, issues that need to be solved yesterday. But there are people who will never show by their appearance that it is difficult for them. They know that problems attract new problems. Therefore, these people are always in excellent mood - this is their habit. If you develop it in yourself, you will see how the situation changes.
The value of a person to others is measured by what he can give them. This may be knowledge, attention, care, help. Take care of yourself, master your profession perfectly, acquire the necessary skills, develop talents.
If you have something to give to another, you absolutely definitely need someone. The question may be that you want to be the wrong people. In these cases, you need to be extremely careful - when you endlessly give, without receiving anything in return, sooner or later nothing remains. So this inner emptiness is formed, causing so much pain. This is where the complexes, experiences, a feeling of uselessness arise. From such a relationship to leave.
Absolutely sure you need someone else - it's time to look around. Just do not offer your soul to the first comer. Appreciate yourself, and then the person next to you will also appreciate you.
There are many people who need and need support - both children and adults. There are various funds helping them. If you feel an urgent need to be needed - find out which organizations in your region are dealing with similar issues. They always need people. So you do not just save yourself from inner emptiness, but also make the world a better place, and also find new friends.
When you lose a loved one
Sometimes terrible events occur, after which it is difficult to recover, and it really seems that nobody needs you. Sometimes dear and close people, who were for us the meaning of life, leave. There is nothing else but to gather strength and live on.
Psychologists recommend finding an occupation that can distract you even for a while. It is very important not to close the four walls, but be sure to go out. Walking will help you to recover a little and understand that life has not stopped.
