We can confidently say that self-confidence is inherent in all people, simply expressed in each of us in varying degrees. We are sure in some of our qualities or skills, not in others. What is the reason? Why sometimes, even in familiar situations, there is self-doubt? Can I fight it? How to understand that someone is not confident? Is our perception of our own capabilities objective? Generally, what is self-confidence? What does it depend on? Why develop it?
What is self confidence?
Self-confidence is the right person to assess their own skills and abilities to achieve their goals or meet their needs. When someone overestimates their abilities, then we can talk about self-confidence. If you underestimate - this is self-doubt. It is difficult to say which of these shortcomings is worse, since each of them is harmful to the individual.
Unconfident people risk less often, do not get into dangerous situations so often, but occupy low social roles and lead a less fulfilling life. Self-confidence, on the contrary, pushes for "feats" and, even, can raise a person in the eyes of others, but sometimes plays a cruel joke with regard to its owner and people who trust him. Having overestimated one's own strength, someone might regret it very much.
As in most other cases, suitable "golden mean"- healthy self-confidence, which allows you to realize your potential avoiding unreasonable risk. It is important to determine your confidence level in order to understand the correlation of your self-esteem and real abilities. Our" Test - Self-confidence Diagnosis "is useful in this, having passed okay with self esteem.
Studying self-confidence psychology, as the science of human behavior, shows the relationship of this concept with other personality characteristics. Our temperament and character are due to heredity (genes). Also plays a big role education, the formation of personality in the social environment.
There are three stages in the development of self-confidence:
- Psychological;
- Mental;
- Practical.
Psychological level - these are all personal prerequisites that make us prone to self-confidence or underestimation.
Mental stage - worldview based on thinking and conscious positioning of oneself.
Practical level - this is life experience, confirming or refuting our ideas about our skills and abilities.
They are closely interrelated and can adjust each other. Most often, the formation of self-confidence goes in the direction from the internal attitude to the practical implementation. But sometimes life experience can make significant adjustments. For example, some girl regularly repeats that “I am not confident in myself,” “it’s difficult for me to meet others,” “I don’t need anyone,” etc. Her way of thinking, according to the principle of attraction, forms life situations. That is, everyone around knows this uncertainty and does not rush to persuade the girl. One day she finds herself in another city and suddenly finds herself friends. This radically changes her perception of her abilities. Accordingly, at the mental and psychological level, changes also occur. She has self-confidence, develops a more objective assessment of their abilities.
Who is such a confident person?
A self-confident person objectively assesses his capabilities, really understands what he can and cannot do. Confidence does not leave him in those situations in which he is really able to do something. But if such a person faces a task that exceeds his abilities, he will not mislead himself and those around him. The harm of overconfidence lies in the fact that it is possible not only not to do something yourself, but also to bring others down. Healthy self-confidence is the key to success, without undue risk and mock bravado.
Confident people are always in demand in society. They establish social ties more easily, move faster along the career ladder, enjoy the attention of the opposite sex. Such people are optimistic and proactive, able to take responsibility.
What is self-doubt?
Self-doubt is the property of an individual to downplay his own abilities and significance. Closely related to another closely related concept, familiar to many from childhood - an inferiority complex. Such people tend to consider themselves worse than they really are. They find it harder to build relationships with others.
Self-doubt can be compared with an anchor that does not allow a ship to the open sea. The main thing is to understand that standing at the pier will not achieve anything. If someone regularly catches himself thinking "I am not confident in myself," then he should think about it. After all, self-doubt, helping to avoid local disappointment, endangers a person’s entire life globally.
Self-doubtful people will never live with someone they really like, will not go to a decent job, they will not build their lives as they could. And this is really scary! So does it make sense to be afraid of temporary failure, if all life is at stake? Fortunately, for those who decide to develop self-confidence, there are exercises. We will definitely talk about them in our other articles. Now consider how to understand that someone is not confident in himself? After all, in order to deal with something, for a start, it is worth revealing it.
How does insecurity manifest itself?
If someone is unsure of himself, this is "written on his forehead." Actions, a look, a manner of speech - literally everything will signal: "I am not sure" or "I am not sure of myself." Moreover, do not think that insecurity is more terrible for men. Women themselves also lose a lot when they underestimate themselves and their abilities.
How to determine the presence of self-doubt? What factors indicate this?
- Fear of failure;
- Pessimistic expectations;
- Negative attitude;
- Poorly formed social behavior skills;
- Difficult interpersonal communication;
- Passivity in decision making;
- Dependence on the opinions of others;
- The tendency to shift responsibility to others.
When such manifestations are found in oneself or someone else, the outlook should be changed immediately, otherwise it will be more and more difficult with each year.
It should be remembered that self-confidence is not a luxury, but a necessary condition for a full life. The sooner this is understood, the more time will be left for success and happiness.
