Psychology

How to get rid of the feeling of hatred towards a person: advice and comment by a psychologist

Hate is a very difficult feeling to understand that people often cannot even explain. It seems to them that negative feelings arose from scratch, but in fact, there are always serious prerequisites for such emotions.

Trying to eliminate hatred towards a person or a group of people, many make unpardonable mistakes that only exacerbate the problem. How can one cope with the negative in one’s own heart and gain complete understanding with the world?

Causes of Hate

How to stop hating others is a good question, but it is simply impossible to answer it until the motives for the emergence of negative feelings are fully understood. The reasons for the appearance of such emotions can be many, and here are just the main ones:

  • the person feels the competition that breeds hatred towards his opponent;
  • once two people insulted one another or spoke negatively about the moral qualities of an opponent, which degenerated into a similar feeling in the future;
  • hatred can arise from elementary envy, when one person cannot remain indifferent to the achievements of another;
  • sometimes enmity appears as a reaction to the neglect of one person to another;
  • quite often hate is born due to incompatibility of characters.

At the heart of this feeling is always hidden negative. Everything can begin with one wrong word, a silly joke, which translates into mutual insults. After a couple of months, people are already starting to hate each other.

The rivalry between two personalities also rarely ends with something good. Moreover, the competition can relate to both personal life and career sphere. Feeling competition, the person will try to find flaws in his opponent in order to establish himself in his superiority. The desire to be first in both will result in a sharp negative attitude towards each other.

Sometimes hatred arises because of elementary dissimilarity. If the choleric and phlegmatic begin to communicate, they immediately encounter the absolute bipolarity of characters. As a result, the negative increases with each new meeting, turning into burning hatred.

Psychologists confirm that the motive for the emergence of negative feelings can be absolutely insignificant. But this does not negate the fact that a bad attitude towards your opponent will arise and prove to be ineradicable.

Only by finding out the motive of feeling can one proceed to the solution of the question of how to get rid of hatred.

Why does a man hate everyone around

Sometimes there are especially difficult cases of hatred towards all others. In such a situation, a person feels an incredible isolation from the world, because he cannot be friends, build relationships and even communicate with others. Why does this situation appear?

  1. A person may have high self-esteem, which means that everything around him does not seem to be smart enough or attractive. This gives rise to a sense of superiority, which translates into hatred towards everyone around them.
  2. Lurking complexes that make a person closed, make him perceive everyone around him in a negative way.
  3. Often, children in adolescence experience hatred towards everyone around them. This is due to the fact that students do not feel understanding from adults or peers, and this gives rise to anger and negative.
  4. The feeling can be dictated by the elementary unwillingness to understand the motives of others' actions and actions. As a result, a person refuses to communicate with the outside world, experiencing a negative to everyone without exception.

Getting rid of the negative in this situation is amazingly difficult. Typically, psychologists are advised to find a single person, communication with whom will deliver the least discomfort. Further, with the help of this friend you can comprehend the world, finding more and more good friends.

If hatred of everything, without exception, arises from the rejection of their shortcomings, we will have to learn tolerance. Ideal people do not exist, and that is why it is necessary to perceive someone's ignorance or unattractiveness in a positive way. In this case, it will be easier to communicate with the world.

Negative towards all, without exception, with time turns into horrific consequences. Such lonely people often commit crimes, wanting to eliminate those who annoy them, that is, everyone around them. There are not rare cases of suicide, because feeling disconnected from the whole world, it is so easy to be in the loop.

Ways to combat negative

How to stop hating a person, and is it possible to overcome a negative feeling? Psychologists emphasize that this is possible, but work on yourself will have a lot. What steps will help to cope with negative emotions?

  1. It is necessary on a piece of paper to list all the positive qualities of a person, in order to at least weaken the negative towards him.
  2. It is necessary to meet and discuss the situation, try to find out why the problem arose at all.
  3. In no case can not stoop to gossip. The less often a person thinks badly and talks about the one he hates, the better.
  4. It should learn to tolerate people.
  5. If all of these tips are useless, then it is necessary to minimize contact with the hated person. In the absence of constant communication, the negative will gradually disappear.

What to do if you hate a person with whom you work or communicate in the same company? First you need to understand whether these negative emotions are mutual. If your opponent often makes fun of you, spreads rumors and says nasty things behind his back, then we are most likely talking about mutual enmity.

In such a situation, the best way to resolve the conflict will be a conversation. You should sit down and discuss the causes of the problem. Sometimes it can be some kind of completely insignificant trifle, and sometimes the cause of negativity is hidden sympathy.

If the conversation did not help, then it is necessary to stop the negative, coming from its side. Throwing charges in one direction and proceeding from bile, the opponent will sooner or later get tired, and the enmity will automatically stop.

How to cope with the hatred of a person, if all these methods are useless? In this case, psychologists recommend minimizing contacts. If individuals do not communicate and do not overlap, it becomes harder for them to hate each other. Gradually, the enmity evaporates altogether.

Cases when it is impossible to cope with negative

Most often, people take for elementary hatred hostility, which is much easier in their motivation. However, there are situations when it is simply impossible to get rid of unpleasant sensations. This is due to deep feelings, personal disgust, which always has a reason.

Thus, an abandoned wife is unlikely to be able to forgive a separation girl and accept the incident. The father of the deceased child will not stop hating the murderer, even if two dozen psychologists come to his aid.

In such a situation, the only reasonable solution is to completely ignore this person. You should not follow him on social networks, condemn him or look for meetings. Minimal contact will help in the end at least a little smooth out the negative.

Not everyone is able to find out the answer to the question of how to overcome hatred towards a person. The problem here is that to get rid of the negative you need to change a little yourself. We'll have to reconsider their views, beliefs, emotions. However, it is necessary to fight with such a black feeling to the end, because it can destroy its bearer from the inside.

Watch the video: 5 Signs You Are Seeing a BAD Therapist! psychology & mental health with Kati Morton (November 2024).