Having lived in marriage for several years, a woman may have a question: how to interest her husband again, and is it possible.
Psychologists answer that it is quite possible, it is necessary only find the right approach.
The reasons for the lack of interest in men
Why is the husband not interested in me?
Before you look for ways, you'll have to figure out why the husband stopped paying attention to his spouse.
Main reasons:
- Your life has become monotonous, in them there are no new eventsand my husband just got bored.
- He found himself another woman.
- You have become less attractive to him.. Unfortunately, many married women no longer look after themselves, they go home wearing old clothes. For some reason they think that if they are married, then the husband should take them as they are.
Another excuse is that I don’t have time to put on good clothes, do my hair, take care of myself. In fact, time can always be found.
- Permanent scandals. Clarification of relationships alienates people from each other., the desire for intimacy disappears, since much depends on the presence of positive emotions. If the wife constantly blames the husband for his mistakes, laziness, lack of finances, then he wants to be as far as possible from such a woman.
- He gives himself up completely to work., he gets tired, and he no longer has the strength to pay attention to his spouse.
Unfortunately, in the modern world, many families suffer from lack of funds. If you have loans, the need to raise a child, then you need to understand how much finance is spent on it. The husband tries to provide for his family, but this is the cause of severe fatigue, constant stress.
- You recently had a baby, at this time it is not uncommon for the husband to become cold. This is due to the crisis period in the life of the family. In addition, the figure of a woman at this time less attractive. She prefers comfortable and simple clothes, as she constantly has to be in the care of the house and the child.
The husband does not already see the former beautiful wife, and his desire for intimacy is reduced.
- Health problemsIt is quite possible that the spouse does not want to inform his relatives about it.
How is it shown?
How do you understand that the husband really lost interest in you:
- he call you less often or write to you messages, if only on domestic issues;
- not answering calls, motivating that is busy, works, communicates with friends;
- between you no previous warmth, affection, intimacy;
- you stopped sharing with each other experiences;
- trying hard spending time with friends or finds some hobby, goes to the garage, go fishing, arguing that he wants to relax or has some important things to do;
- delayed at work, takes an additional part-time job, to be at home less often;
- stopped making compliments or makes them very rare. Perhaps a woman behaves in such a way that she does not want to make compliments. Or looks untidy, neglected, behaves incorrectly from the point of view of a man;
- does not give gifts on significant holidays or to get off with purely symbolic things, not trying to surprise and make pleasant;
- answers in monosyllableswhen you want to talk to him;
- not interested in your life, health, mood, work, how was the day, shows complete indifference;
- spends a lot of time in social networks, games, watching TV.
A man does not instantly give you attention. The bell was long, but the woman prefers not to notice this, thinking that it will pass.
In fact, it is necessary to work on relationships, and both parties must do so.
What to do?
Firstly, do not panic, there is a possibility that this phenomenon is temporary.
Pay attention to his behavior: maybe he was just tired, there were problems at work, but you do not have a sufficient level of confidence to share a problem with you.
Try to talk to your spouse. You can think one thing, and in fact the problem lies elsewhere. Prepare a delicious dinner, create a favorable atmosphere, send the children to relatives.
If you can not organize a conversation at home, go together to a quiet place.
Dialogue is the best way to find out what is happening in the family. Listen carefully. A man is quite capable of telling what exactly he cares about, how to correct the situation.
If the husband told the reason for his inattention to you, now you can correct the situation.
Consider that frank conversation often leads to the most unexpected results. Be prepared to learn and not really nice things and not to make a scandal, because you were the initiator of the conversation.
Pay attention to how you yourself talk to your husband: Are there any reproaches in your words, criticism, are you interested in your spouse, do you worry about him sincerely?
Bad method - interfere with your relationships with other people.
Never involve relatives, friends, and especially children.
All issues must be resolved between spouses. If you want to use an intermediary, please refer to the help. professional family counselor.
Tips for women
Let us turn to the practice: what can a woman really undertake in order for her husband again to pay attention to her?
How to please him even more?
When you started living together, there was a passion between you. But feelings change over time, disappear or get deeper.
If you think you got married, and now the man is not going anywhere, then this is a mistake of many women.
Relationships need to work constantly, change, invest, but do not lose yourself, while remaining a unique personality. We are interesting to other people, when we are primarily interested in ourselves.
- be closebut at the same time not fully dependent on the man, keep self-sufficiency;
- surprise him in intimate relationships - buy a new lingerie, become a little more relaxed, invent interesting games. Just consider the nature of the husband and his possible reaction.
- dress nicely and for husband too. The mistake of many women is to walk at home in old clothes, a worn robe, with dirty hair. So you just push the man away;
Imagine every day he sees well-groomed women in the street, and at home his spouse waits, untidy-dressed.
- praise man, but do not overlook - compliments must be sincere and to the point;
- look in the eyesshow with your eyes your interest and love;
- go together in a trip;
- do not criticize his parents, no matter how they behaved. Mother and father are close people to him, so any attempts to say something bad about them can be met with aggression;
- train yourself to smile;
- do your best don't flirt with strangers with him. Even a jealous spouse is worried when his woman draws attention to other men;
- take his gifts with joy and gratitude;
- take his helpotherwise the next time he does not offer.
How to interest a spouse after 10 years of marriage?
During this period people very tired of each other.
They are united by a joint life, children, the same problems.
In a close person already studied everything: advantages and disadvantages that can be annoying.
As a result, a crisis comes, and people begin to drift away. Intimate life also becomes monotonous, no old spark. But all is not lost.
- Have active life positiondo not immerse yourself completely in life and dependence on men.
- Change. I have not dyed my hair for a long time - a reason to go to the hairdresser
- Pay attention to your clothes - whatever you choose - attractive dresses or pants, choosing them according to convenience. Change your image, become more alive, vibrant.
- Be positive. Yes, it is not always easy to show positive emotions if there are so many problems around.
Try to change the pessimistic mood for optimism. Problems - a reason to change something in your life, to pay attention to the wrong actions.
- Find a hobbydo not devote yourself exclusively to home.
To please other people, you must first be interesting to yourself. Enjoy yourselfmake yourself small gifts. If you love yourself, then your husband will appreciate you more as a person.
Review your family values and goals.
What do you want further from life, what does husband mean to you You have lived together for 10 or more years, which means you have a lot to do.
Be thankful for every day together, and talk about it to your spouse. Let him know that you value and respect him.
How to draw ex-husband again?
First, think about - do you really need it. It is likely that the ex-husband has another woman.
First rule - Do not run after a man, do not beg for attention.
- Show him that you enjoy life.
- Radically change your image - not for him, but first of all, for yourself. Enjoy your new look.
- Find a job for the soul. Career, favorite type of activity increase self-confidence.
- Take care of your figure - go to fitness, yoga, pool, adjust the diet.
- Occasionally come across his eyes. As an option - next to another man to cause him a touch of jealousy.
Try not to get upset and maintain a positive mood. You are not responsible for the actions of other people, and only they themselves make their choice.
What not to do?
There are mistakes that women make in an attempt to win a man again or avenge his mistakes.
- Do not try make it change.
- Do not chase him, Do not be humiliated, do not call and do not write - you cannot break a man with such methods, but only away from yourself.
- Do not change in revenge.
- Forget about criticism, reproaches like: you do not love me, do not pay attention.
- Do not threaten separation - if the word starts to sound in the family, then sooner or later divorce is inevitable.
- Can not discuss your husband with other people. The exception is a psychologist who will help solve the problem.
It is in your power to make a man like you again. Develop inner light, remain optimistic, and then other people will be happy to be with you.
How to maintain the warmth of the relationship after 10 years of marriage: