Every child has crises, during which he withdraws from his parents, withdraws into himself and becomes too emotional.
Crises in children by year can be overcome, if you listen to the advice of psychologists.
Knowing certain rules, a parent will be able to find common language with the child and prevent conflicts.
Psychology and concept
Crisis age - what is it?
The crisis of childhood is called transition period between age stages.
This happens at the completion of certain stages of development. This phenomenon occurs due to physiological and psychological alterations.
How a crisis manifests itself depends on the child’s temperament, character, and social relations. If in one case its manifestation is strong, the baby became nervousthen in the other you can hardly notice it.
Psychologists say that during such periods even the most calm children become very nervous, irritable and even aggressive. They react emotionally to familiar words and phrases, trying to prove their case.
Young children while crying, stomping their feet, throwing toys and lying down on the floor in hysterics. Older children usually argue with their parents, provoke a conflict, do not try to find a compromise.
According to experts, such phenomena not escape. They are important for the development of the child, the formation of his psyche and social relations.
The duration of crises usually does not exceed several months, but under the influence of negative factors, certain circumstances increase the duration.
Signs of a child crisis and how to survive it
For each age characterized by certain signs of crisis. To cope with this difficult period, you need to listen to psychologists.
First year of life
A 1 year crisis is characterized by several features that a parent must know. Consider the table:
| Features | Reluctance to obey, tearfulness, sudden mood swings. The baby can be affectionate, and after five minutes start crying for no reason. Jealousy appears: the child demands that all the attention of parents be riveted to him. There are screams and crying, if mom or dad turned away, distracted about their business. |
| Causes of crisis at this age | There is an active physiological and intellectual development. The kid learns the world, is rebuilt, which affects his behavior. It may seem to him that he has become an adult and close ones do not need to obey. For this reason, children roll up tantrums. |
| What actions can not be done | Parents during this period can not demonstrate their power, shout at the child, bring him to tears. They should remain friends, not enemies. At this age, children are sensitive to the tone of the voices of loved ones, therefore, we must speak strictly, but not fall for crying, otherwise it will negatively affect the psyche. It is necessary to show tolerance without applying corporal punishment. |
Children at this age become very touchy, they get very upset if their mother screams at them and scolds for something. You need to be affectionate, hug the baby during hysterics, because physical contact is important to him: he feels the warmth of the mother and calms down.
If the child has become independent, do not prohibit it.
for example: he wants to eat himself with a spoon, takes it in his hand, we must allow him to try to eat on his own. This will have a beneficial effect on its development.
In addition, it is necessary be a friend to him: play together, watch cartoons. Joint pastime and attention of parents will give the child a sense of security. He will understand that he is loved and appreciated, then the crisis will be overcome more easily and quickly.
One and a half years
Recognizing this period at this age is easy. The following appear the signs:
- Unexplained behavior. Children can first hug a loved one, and then hit him, or suddenly throw his favorite toy on the floor.
Such actions are explained by the restructuring of the nervous system, maturation.
- Always next to mom. Children everywhere follow their mother, wherever she goes and cry, if suddenly mom went about her business.
- Stubbornness. The child begins to show obstinacy and unwillingness to follow the opinion of the parents. For example: a child may take off his shirt and take another in his hands, showing that he likes other clothes. There are cases of refusal to eat certain foods: he spits out food, cries.
- Knowledge of the world. The kid tries to explore this world without resorting to the help of his parents: he tries to get out of the crib, runs away from his mother, does everything that is forbidden to him. If mother said not to touch certain things, then he would definitely want to come to them and cry if this thing was taken away from him.
The reason for such action is child's intellectual development. He has a strong desire to know the world, to touch the things around him, but at the same time there is a childish moodiness and a desire to attract the attention of parents to himself, as if showing what he has learned, what he has found.
During this period, you can not show negative emotions and shout at children. Letting them be more independent.
Mom should watch from the side of the actions of the babybut not control every step. He will be glad if they take him as an equal, they will play with him.
In two years
In two years, the child is even more pronounced his independence.
Short words and phrases appear that the baby uses to express. independence.
Most children at this age say: "I do not want," "I will not," "no," "I myself." They try to do everything on their own, help their parents and believe that they know everything better than adults.
Moods appear when they something is forbidden to do. Then there is a cry, the child knocks his feet on the floor, so that he is allowed to carry out his plans.
He especially likes to answer no to all the questions of his elders. This becomes a new toy, so these answers can not be taken seriously.
Only need have patience and do not scold the child, trying to explain that this is not always the appropriate answer.
The reasons for this behavior are first manifestations of personality traits. The child gradually begins to realize itself, certain preferences are formed, the model of behavior is laid.
Psychologists recommend to find common grounds with children trying to behave in a friendly way. Interdictions should be explained, pronounced calmly, since severity is perceived as an order.
3 years
At three years old child becomes more independent: trying to prove to adults that is equal to them, can do a lot of things himself.
The main signs of a three-year crisis are:
- Negativism. Children cease to obey their parents, refuse to every request: they do not want to go home, although they are already tired of walking, refuse to eat, although they have been hungry for a long time. They just do not want to agree on anything with their relatives.
- Obstinacy. He stops listening to someone, pretends that they are not turning to him, can run away for a walk, and suddenly make a mess in the room, scattering toys.
- Despotism. The kid goes to great lengths, so that everyone in the family obeys only him: she can pick up her sister's toys, knock someone out of her parents if they do not allow her to do what she wants. It seems to him that he is in charge and everyone should obey him.
- Willfulness. Three-year-olds do everything to look like adults: they try to turn on electrical appliances themselves, cross the road without holding mom's hand. At the most unexpected moment, they can run away, while on a walk they try not to notice the presence of adults.
During this period it is important to explain what cannot be done, what actions are strictly prohibited. We must speak strictly and warn about punishments.
6 years
The crisis of this age radically different from what was in the past.
The child no longer throws tantrums, will not begin to cry in a public place and knock legs.
The restructuring of the body is manifested differently:
- Dramatic change in behavior. It changes dramatically: instead of stories of all secrets, secrecy appears, instead of obedience, rudeness arises.
- Fear formation. It is at this age that fears begin to appear. Someone confesses that he is afraid of insects, and someone of the dark.
- No interest in the game. What liked before, now does not cause interest. Favorite doll or car can lie on the shelves of the cabinet, the child will not fit them.
Kids start to be rude adults become unbearable to communicate.
But even in this case, it is not necessary to be rude and shouting; you should punish them, speak as seriously and strictly as possible so that they understand that you have to answer for misdeeds.
AT 7
Appears when the child realizes that he will soon go to school and he there will be new responsibilities, friends, you will need to make many decisions yourself.
He understands that he is growing up, but he is not yet used to new duties.
Adulthood borders on childishness which affects the behavior of a negative: a child can be capricious, becomes restless, mimics adults.
There are possible outbursts of anger, irritability, absent-mindedness, which affects school performance badly: the child gets low marks, is afraid to tell parents about them, becomes secretive.
AT 8
During this period, the child loses naivety and gullibility. He becomes more mature, there are actions and phrases that are characteristic of an adult.
It seems to him that he may be mistaken in important matters, self-love and self-confidence are lost, and discontent with his own image may appear. The kid may refuse to wear this or that clothes, he is going to school longer, he chooses what to wear for a long time.
May appear criticism to yourself and even teachers.
This is expressed by dissatisfaction with communication, frequent conflicts.
Inappropriate behavior with flashes of anger and the tendency to fight grows.
It is very important for the close ones to immediately solve such problems, talk more with the child and explain to him that he will be punished. Good behavior, on the contrary, should be encouraged.
Opinion of Dr. Komarovsky
Dr. Komarovsky says that the child should be given the opportunity to be independent, one should not infringe upon his rights, freedom and control every step.
Important to be near, but as a mentor or friend, not an enemy or a despot. They do not scold him for his misdeeds, but talk to him strictly, making it clear what exactly was done wrong, how to behave correctly.
You can not impose your opinion, especially if there is a question of choosing clothes, toys.
It should be with him as often as possible to consult, so that he could Express your opinion.
It is necessary to establish contact with the child, to become friends, so that he can trust loved ones.
In children, there are crises that manifest themselves at each age differently. Having studied their signs, listening to the advice of psychologists, to overcome these periods will become much easier.
Crises of childhood. Psychologist tips:
