Practical recommendations: what to do if the girl has changed?

Two people in love with each other, in the process of living together may face various difficulties, and one of them - treason.

A young man who has convicted his beloved of treason may face a lot of disturbing questions. What if the girl changes?

How to determine why she does it? What better way to do? To answer them and understand how to proceed, it is important to carefully consider what happened.

Possible reasons

Understand for sure why did the girl changeIt can be quite difficult or even impossible.

If her boyfriend is not a telepath, of course.

Some reasons may not be obvious, and even if it seems to a man that he absolutely knows what is wrong with him, he may be mistaken.

Partner violence

It may be:

physical;
mental;
sexy

Physical violence - this is beating, various rude actions like hair pulling, pushing away. It is widely believed among men that a small amount of physical violence is only beneficial.

But this is absolutely not the case! This medieval prejudice place in the Middle Ages. No one can be pleased when he is treated cruelly. And this can in no way benefit the relationship.

Mental abuse - insults, humiliation, rude jokes, blackmail, various manipulations from a partner, gazlayting and much more.

Sexual abuse - forced sex.

Among men, there are also a lot of those who are sure that a woman in a relationship should always be ready to have sex on demand, she can even be forced, and this is supposedly more than the norm.

But, of course, it is not. If a man does not consider the desires of a woman, their relationship nothing good will come.

Even a single episode of violence in any form can lead a girl to the idea that you are not the best partner for her. It is possible that treason is only the first step, followed by a break in relations.

Quarrels, misunderstandings

Quarreling - anyway, the norm in any relationship, not only romantic. The question is how the couple solves the problems that caused the quarrel.

If quarrels arise a couple of times, but there is no compromise capable of resolving the conflict, sooner or later the relationship will begin to go to pieces.

Lack of perspectives in a relationship

If paired critically lack of financeThis may cause a woman to look towards other men.

The common stereotype that women need as much money as possible cannot be true for all women, but not everybody agrees with the statement that with a nice paradise and in a hut.

Joint life, institution of children, housekeeping - all this requires investment of funds and strength, and if a man is not willing to invest them, it can cause adultery.

It is also not uncommon for a woman to have completely different goals in life, different from the goals pursued by her boyfriend. Therefore, if she gets in the way of a man who has similar goals, betrayal is inevitable, and after it often leads to a break in relations.

Revenge

Some women are positive about the idea of annoying a partner who offended them with something, make him jealous.

Reasons for revenge can be many, ranging from lack of attention, care and ending more serious problems (for example, the girl found out that her partner is cheating on her).

The realization that the partner does not fit in any criteria

Often it falls on a woman in that period when the main fire of love went out, the so-called "rose-colored glasses" fell.

She begins to look at her partner differently, sees her disadvantages more clearly, is more aware of what is happening.

In this case reasons for treason can be mass, for example, lack of affection, care, low satisfaction during sex, unpleasant character traits and behavioral patterns.

Unexpected love

Love can fall on a woman by accident, and not everyone will have the strength and desire to resist this feeling, even if the current guy completely suits her.

Perhaps she hoped that her intrigues would go unnoticed.

If a woman does not have any serious claims to a regular partner, unexpected love will hardly be the cause of a break in relations and will only lead to a short intrigue.

Search for new experiences

Perhaps in the life of a girl for a long time nothing interesting happened, but relationship with a regular partner has long lost its former light, so she decided on treason. This item can be combined with the previous one.

The only way to know for sure why the girl has changed is to speak frankly, without aggression and violence, face to face.

In the process of such a dialogue can find out the reasons and discuss further actions.

Also during the conversation, you can, for example, unexpectedly find out that the man with whom her acquaintances saw her in a cafe is just a relative who came to visit, about whom she did not have time or did not consider it necessary to say.

Forgive or break with her?

Forgive or not? If a couple had serious problems before the betrayal, the best option would be end the relationship.

Otherwise, everything depends on many factors: the causes and circumstances of adultery, the behavior and character of a girl, the nature of a man, the presence or absence of problems in a couple, the strength of feelings that a man has for her, and much more.

It is important to understand that the decision on how to act, everyone must make their own. Suitable algorithm about what to do, and there can not be.

What if the girl changed? Should I renew the relationship after treason? Find out from this video:

Psychological advice and practical recommendations

How to survive the betrayal of his beloved and whether to maintain such a relationship?

What if she is not recognized?

Are you convinced that your love has betrayed you, but she herself does not want to admit? How to be?

Try to calm down and weigh all the facts. Acting on a hot head is unwise. A person under the influence of emotions may behave inadequately and is not capable of a balanced analysis. Moreover, the probability of error is always preserved: the girl could be defrauded, or some information about the change is not accurate enough.
When you feel that you are relatively calm, talk to the girl. Be polite to her, hold back negative emotions, ask essentially. Ask her about what is happening, ask all the questions that you care about, provide proof. It is possible that during this dialogue, the girl confesses to treason, and then it will be possible to consider further actions.

You should not try to revenge the girl or the person with whom she changes: this is unlikely to help you get rid of the pain and resentment, but can lead to irreparable consequences, up to and including the trials.

If you feel depressed, constantly angry, you feel that you can not calm down, suffer guilt, you should turn to a psychotherapist or to a psychologist.

Slept with a friend: what to do?

Talk to each of them separately. Ask about the causes of the incident and try to maintain composure. Do not express aggression and try to get revenge. It is better to understand the situation and try to accept its consequences.
Keep jealousy under control and remember that if your girlfriend communicates with your friend closer and more often than you would like, it is not a betrayal.

If the relationship between a girl and a friend is more than serious, separation will be the best option.

If you are not ready to forgive a friend, stop communicating with him. You do not have to try to forgive him if you do not have the strength to do so.

Walks periodically, but does not stop

If this happens, then, most likely, she either loves you, or is interested in you as a partner, or does not want to change the existing situation.

As in previous situations, you need to calm down, carefully consider the situation and wait for some time. When you feel that you are ready for a dialogue, discuss it with a girl without aggression.
If you are not ready to continue the relationship with her, do not need to delay the gap, so as not to torment yourself.
If you feel that you love her too much and are not capable of parting, discuss the situation with her again: you may be able to find a compromise together.
Sometimes it takes time to realize the need for separation. Give yourself this time, and later you may feel that you are ready to end the relationship.

It will also be useful to visit the family psychotherapist with the girl: he will help to understand the situation and give appropriate recommendations.

I learned that the beloved accidentally changed

Most often similar stories with random changes closely related to alcohol.

A person who is intoxicated is rarely able to fully control himself.

In some cases, its helplessness is simply used by people nearby, in which case it is rape rather than treason. It all depends on the circumstances and the degree of intoxication.

It is important to remember that the betrayal associated with sex during intoxication, difficult to fully analyze due to the lack of information: the participants in the events can practically remember nothing, and those that remember can keep silent or, conversely, lie if it is to their advantage.

Therefore, the best option is to rely on your own attitude towards the girl and on her reactions during the discussion.

If she is alarmed, feels guilty and asserts that she did not control herself well, it is hardly worth taking the incident too seriously, especially if this situation is sporadic and there are no other problems in the relationship.

What to do if you changed a girl? Tips in this video:

How to behave so that betrayal never happens?

It is impossible to completely eliminate the probability of betrayal, but it is always realistic to reduce it to a minimum:

Exclude any violence from your relationship. Recognize that violence cannot be the way to solve any problems, especially in the loving union of two people. A woman who is forced to endure any violence can hardly feel safe, and sooner or later she will want to change the existing situation.
Agree to solve all arising problems through a calm dialogue. Explain to her that this is the only way to create a harmonious, trusting relationship in which everyone feels comfortable. Let it become a habit.
Keep jealousy under control. Attempts to control the girl’s life, aggression from scratch, baseless accusations can hardly strengthen your relationship. If you feel that it is difficult for you to cope with jealousy, consult a psychotherapist.
If it seems to you that something is missing in the relationship, discuss it with a girl., even if it seems that anxiety is groundless. It is possible that during such a dialogue you will learn that the girl lacks attention, she does not like everything in bed, or she feels that life has become too monotonous.
People do not always want to talk about the little things that they do not like, but these little things are also able to shake relationships and push one of the partners to change.