Many parents wonder: how to raise a naughty child.
His behavior can lead out of himself, but it is necessary to fight with children's moods.
Psychologists lead several important recommendationsthat will help streamline the process of education.
The reasons
Why do children act up? Causes of whims may vary according to age.
1-2 years
Why is the baby constantly whining? At this age, the most common causes of vagaries are:
- Lack of sleep: the child did not get enough sleep, so it becomes whiny and irritable.
- Overwork: if the parents took the kid to the event, to the hospital, they were long for a walk, he might be tired and give a sign to the whims that you need to go home and rest.
- A change of scenery: the child gets used to a certain room and people, and if the situation suddenly changes, he is frightened, does not understand why everything has changed, tries to draw attention to himself in order to be protected.
- Reaction to the word "no": kids begin to be interested in everything that is outside the crib and do not understand why parents do not allow them to learn the world.
- Impossibility to express your opinion: the child feels that he is led and he has certain convictions, but he is not able to express them, therefore the only way out of the situation is whims.
Psychologists call this age the first age crisis. A child by this time accumulates a certain amount of knowledge and skills, which requires the transfer of relations with parents to a new level.
He begins to realize that is a person. He is interested in the world around him, who is trying to learn with the help of mastering speech.
Children in this period still can not establish contact with others through speech and say what they need or don’t like: they are not able to put into words what they care about, so they start to act up.
There is an awareness that such behavior attract attention loved ones.
3-4 years
This age period is difficult because relationship restructuring between baby and parents.
By this time he had already formed a character, there is an awareness of his own "I". Given the changed behavior, which has become more conscious, trying to build relationships again.
If there is a misunderstanding on the part of adults, baby reacts very emotionallyindignant that they do not understand him and do not want to be taken seriously. Even cool children become aggressive and can behave as follows:
- throw toys on the floor;
- knock your feet on the floor and cry;
- be stubborn, screaming and screaming;
- fall to the floor and not listen to adults.
Psychologists say that such actions can not be called established.
The child is experimenting with the effects on others. He wonders whether it will be possible to have what one wants if we cry and scream.
5-6 years
In this age emotional breakdowns happen quite deliberately. The child knows that he will achieve his goal if he starts crying, squealing and knocking his feet on the floor.
He thus acts on those around him so that his desires are fulfilled. Such manipulations in the future will intensify if they are not stopped at this age.
This happens if at an earlier age whims ended the desired result for him. Parents simply did not know how to react to it, so they gave the beloved child the desired.
You should stop doing this and not go on about it, continuing to stick to your own point of view.
Why is the baby naughty only with mom?
Some children are naughty only with mom, and they can have fine behavior in kindergarten or when communicating with other people.
This happens because the baby loves the mother the most.
With this man line up more trust and close relationship.
Psychologists say that this happens with the trust of the mother. He does not pretend, is not afraid to show all his feelings. In the future, will be able to share the most intimate with this person.
This may happen for another reason: the child did not have time to be reconstructed. For example: I spent time with my grandmother and adjusted to her behavior, and when my mother came, I did not have time to change lanes. He continues to behave as he did with his grandmother.
It takes time to tune in to the behavior of the mother. As long as the restructuring takes place, he can behave strangely and poorly control his own behavior.
From the side it looks like a tantrum. In this situation should calm down and not to raise the tone of voice without provoking a deterioration in its behavior.
What to do?
Is the child often psyche and naughty? For the moods and emotional behavior of children, parents often do not know how to respond. Psychologists say that to fight this scream, raising the voice can not.
This will only aggravate the situation and make it very nervous, emotionally unstable.
There are other ways to solve the problem. Specialists offer do the following:
- try to find a common language, talk;
- calm, hug;
- to ask his child more often for his opinion, so that he understands that his opinion is important for his relatives;
- give your child his own space - a room or corner where he can play, relax from other people, spend time alone with himself;
- if possible, make concessions to find a compromise.
Psychologists recommend to be tolerant, learn to hear the child and take into account his opinion.
You can play with him, spend more time with himso that he would not experience a lack of attention, understand that he is loved and appreciated, and whims are not needed.
Instead of crying, you should hug the baby, show love. A scream will only push him away and close in on him.
How to cope with a capricious child?
To cope with such situations it is necessary to know a few tricks:
- Praise. It is recommended to praise him, often pay attention to the achievements and successes. This will give the feeling that he is loved, he is important and surrounded by care. This will make it possible to understand that good behavior and success are encouraged, more effort will appear. Inappropriate behavior will be a thing of the past.
- Joy. We must communicate with joy, so that he understands that communication with him leads to positive emotions. If adults will communicate with him tired and dissatisfied, he will think that he is tired, they do not like him.
- Physical contact. Kids love when their parents hug, stroke on the back or head. Physical contact helps to establish a closer relationship and build a more trusting relationship.
- Games. To cope with the whims and become a friend, you must periodically behave like his peer. In the process of games you need to fool around, do not be afraid to seem ridiculous. The kid will understand that his close people are not at all terrible and terrible, but cheerful and kind. Then the vagaries will disappear, he will learn to behave as necessary.
These methods will help to establish a connection, to cope with the whims.
Psychologists recommend using them regularly so that the baby will quickly open up, stop becoming self-contained, become open to communication with loved ones.
How to deal with children's whims?
There are several methods of dealing with this behavior:
- Clarification of the rules. A parent should explain in detail what can and cannot be done. He must understand that not everything is permitted to him and there are certain limits. Do not succumb to provocation, if the child continues to demand his own. Need to ignore his tears, provocations and manipulations. In a few minutes the baby will calm down and he will come running with apologies.
- It happens that whims appear due to the fact that the child is hungry or tired. We must ask whether it is possible to feed him, or he wants to relax. Conversations will help solve the situation.
- It is necessary to explain that inappropriate behavior is followed by punishment. He must understand that his negative emotions and shouts are not approved by his close ones.
It should be explained to the kid that the request will not be fulfilled.
We must speak strictly, but do not shout.
You should not raise your voice, you need to control yourself, control emotions. Composure will work harder and help calm down.
How to raise capricious?
Often these children are more sensitivedemanding of others. They need their loved ones to support them, to be near and not to offend.
Any phrase can bring them out of themselves, but only because of vulnerability and sensitivity. Anger and aggression are consequences, not the cause of such behavior.
In no case should such children be called bad or disobedient, as the situation will change for the worse.
These children should be raised a little differently. They need show more care and attention, explain what is good and what is bad.
Parents should become both mentors and friends. They should see support in them, love. If there was a tantrum, or a breakdown, you do not need to shout, it is better to limit yourself to a stern conversation.
In moments of hysteria, you should talk, but if this does not help, you need to slightly move away from him for a short distance and continue to observe the behavior.
Most likely, after a few minutes the baby will understand that he did a bad thing and will come up with apologies himself. We need to give time to understand this..
It is necessary to work out an installation that encourages only good behavior. If he behaves well, he is praised, made compliments, prepare delicious dishes. This will be an incentive for good behavior. Tantrums remain in the past.
How to calm before bed?
Whims before bed: what to do?
Before going to bed, the children are capricious for various reasons: they get tired, or do not want to go to bed because of the cartoon on TV, computer games.
In this case, you need to find an approach, calm it down, because excessive nervousness and irritability can cause sleep disturbance.
It is recommended to approach the child, pat him on the head, say sweet words, talk, comfort. The main thing is not to provoke him to aggression, because he will not be able to sleep after that.
Need to find out the reason such behavior. Perhaps he was offended at something, he wants to tell his parents about something.
Bedtime need create comfortable conditions in the room: aerate it, slightly dim the light if there is a fear of the dark. It should provide the baby with a comfortable pillow, because sometimes because of discomfort there is discontent and hysteria.
Psychology tips
When raising children should be aware of several recommendations:
- one must be honest and sincere in communication, a lie will sooner or later be revealed and push away the baby;
- attempts should be made to establish a connection; one must try to hear and understand it;
- you can’t stop crying and raising your voice; this is not the way out;
- you must be patient, keep yourself in hand, do not show negative emotions.
If the baby is behaving badly, you need to talk to him. It is necessary to convey information that parents are not enemies, but friends and only want the best for him.
Parental mistakes
Major mistakes in the process of education are:
- indulging a child, fulfilling his requirements;
- refusal of conversation and contact with the child;
- manifestation of negative emotions, screams;
- saying offensive phrases;
- the use of corporal punishment.
Many parents do not try to rectify the situation: prefer to break into a cry, physically punish, and not explain what he did wrong. We need to tell him what to do, so that in the future the child does not do that.
Shouts and negative emotions will not lead to anything good and may cause mental illness in the future.
Raising a naughty child - not an easy task. It is necessary to take into account several rules, follow the recommendations of psychologists.
To avoid mistakes, you must carefully watch your own behavior. Proper education will help the child to open up and stop showing negative emotions.
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