Reluctance is not so rare. Moreover, as psychologists say, it grows with increasing age. If most people want to have a relationship in adolescence, then as they get older, many understand that they no longer see themselves in a relationship. Someone just does not pull, someone did not find her or something else. Sometimes they cannot decide what they want in a relationship. Periodically, one's own desires and needs in this sphere seem almost utopian.
In terms of the latter: if there are a lot of examples of infidelity around, and relations are perceived only as a partnership based, among other things, on loyalty, then there may be a desire to abandon relations altogether. Sometimes the format does not suit: perhaps you want quite a specific relationship, too specific.
A significant role here can play a social assessment. For example, a three-person relationship is very problematic to build, because it is difficult to find participants who would agree to such a format because of the public reaction.
The society’s rather uneasy attitude towards couples with non-traditional orientation. And often someone can give up for that reason.
To begin with, if you do not want a relationship, try to figure out for what reason you decided to give up on yourself within them? Or where did the repulsion come from? This can often be the result of trauma.
It is not necessary that there was already a negative experience in the relationship, that there was an internal trauma along this line.
Most believe that if they have no experience in terms of state in a relationship, then there is no place to take negative moments. But we often draw the first conclusions, get the first emotions from the parental relationship. And if they did not take place, then this could be a strong reason for not wanting a relationship. Similarly, however, not only in relation to the biological immediate parents, but also any relatives who were before the eyes of the child in the early period.
Among the reasons may also be separate conclusions made during adolescence. Or disappointment in love, not come to a relationship.
Fears are often a strong stopping factor in terms of private life. For example, the fear that you can not love, that you yourself (a) can not love. Fears concerning the sexual sphere. Strong inferiority complexes and self-doubt can also interfere.
Irina, Murmansk region.
