What does it mean to truly love a person? Love, like other human feelings, is difficult to describe. Everyone understands and describes it in his own way. For some, she is unrequited, unhappy, for others she is passionate or patient, caring. There is a love for parents, God, friendly. Unites types of love focus on the object - interest, attention, burning.
If a loving person is mentally healthy, then this feeling gives him joy, faith, happiness, fills him with strength. The neurotic, on the other hand, is more likely to fear losing a person, longing, jealousy That is, what will be the love, depends largely on the inner qualities of a person, his character, attitude to people, the world, himself.
Such a different love
You can love a person in different ways. Even the ancient philosophers of Greece described such types of love as agape, lyudus, eros, storge, philia, pragma, mania.
Each of them has its own characteristics:
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Eros - passionate love. About her write poems and make films. Eros pushes people to exploits, forcing them to make rash actions. Such love craves to possess the object. It is characterized by strong emotions, desire, dependence, enthusiasm, passion. Unfortunately, eros is short-lived and often destroys fate. Sometimes it flows into other forms of love. - Ludus - superficial love-game, aimed at having fun. A person who experiences lyudus thinks more about himself than about an object of love. He easily allows treason, spiritual torment is alien to him. When boredom occurs, the relationship breaks down. Some sources treat people as sex without commitment.
- Filia is love based on friendship or kinship. The Greeks described it as the most disinterested, sincere, unconditional love. Filia is a conscious choice of a person to love this or that object. Such love gives the partner the freedom to be himself, fully accepting it with all its strengths and weaknesses.
- Storge - tender love. The feeling of storge does not arise by itself, it is a continuation of other types of love. Most often found in couples who have lived together for 10 or more years. For the storgue-love characteristic element of friendship.
- Agape - sacrificial, unselfish love. Differs in desire to give, without demanding anything in exchange. When experiencing agape, a person wishes happiness to an object of love, even if he makes a choice not in his favor. Such love is based on self-denial, self-giving, forgiveness and condescension. In Christianity, agape is the love of God for man.
- Pragma is down-to-earth, calculating love. Pragma is a mixture of storgue and ludus. A person consciously chooses whom to fall in love with, based on the merits of a partner or the benefits of marriage with him. Satisfies the mind, but not the heart. Eragos and agape are alien to pragma.
- Mania is love-obsession. Heavy, exhausting feeling, which is accompanied by insomnia, refusal to eat. Man is driven by all-consuming passion, jealousy, thirst to possess. May result in suicide or lead to problems with the psyche, physical health. It is a combination of Eros and Ludus.
Eros - passionate love. About her write poems and make films. Eros pushes people to exploits, forcing them to make rash actions. Such love craves to possess the object. It is characterized by strong emotions, desire, dependence, enthusiasm, passion. Unfortunately, eros is short-lived and often destroys fate. Sometimes it flows into other forms of love.Happiness or torment?
To love is not to experience happiness. Love is multifaceted, it can exalt to the skies or subject to inhuman torment. Feelings are not subject to reason. Emotional reaction is always faster than intellectual. Such is the nature of man.
But what makes love happy or unhappy? Only ourselves, people. Feelings are a reflection of the inner world. A depressed, neurotic person will more likely experience love — eros or mania, calm and spiritually developed — agape, filia and storgue, down-to-earth — pragma or lyudus.
But what about unrequited love, you ask? Of course, even the most beautiful person can be in a situation where his feelings are unrequited. But you can get out of it in different ways. For example, to suffer and impose on the object of love or to exclude it from sight, to be distracted by something else. As a rule, strong emotions are characteristic of eros and mania, which disappear on their own rather quickly.
In conclusion, I want to add on my own. From the point of view of psychology and philosophy, loving a person is not always joy and happiness. Medicine, on the whole, defines love as a disease. But despite this, you need to hiccup and believe in a beautiful, happy love. It is she who makes us human, gives us such wonderful qualities as tenderness, caring, compassion, self-sacrifice.
Thanks to love, including unrequited, many wonderful works have been created that touch hearts after centuries. In addition, nothing can replace the native, warm shoulder nearby. The main thing is to find and preserve love, to build relationships that will bring happiness to both of them for many, many years!
