Skuka is one of the reasons that prevents us from enjoying life! This article will not talk about all sorts of drugs for boredom, how to entertain yourself and something to do. I'm going to talk about how to make boredom not occur at all.
Let me tell you why boredom is one of the most dangerous and psychological states that are harmful to a person and will make it necessary to get rid of him. And also you will understand why this state negatively affects our ability to enjoy life.
What is the danger of boredom.
Boredom is not just some kind of mood that arises from time to time and does not affect your personality. In fact, this is one of the main causes of many human problems. The well-known psychologist Victor Frankl said: “boredom today confronts us — with both patients and psychiatrists — more problems than desires and even so-called sexual desires.”
Boredom constantly provokes you to be in search of external stimuli, any activity only in order not to experience the state of discomfort associated with the absence of any activity. The trouble is that such a search for employment to get rid of boredom does not occur selectively. You are ready to do the most routine and meaningless work, just not to sit idle, you just have to do something, no matter what, or experience some sensations.
This is somewhat reminiscent of drug addiction, but instead of a narcotic substance, information and stimuli of the sense organs appear. Also, there is an uncontrollable desire, the satisfaction of which does not bring much pleasure, but only for a certain time removes the feeling of discomfort. And life begins to acquire colors only at those moments when the desire is satisfied.
I will not deny that a person needs fresh impressions, a change of places, new people and entertainment, and if he does not receive it in due measure, then he will slowly develop. But this is good so far does not exceed a certain limit. If you have not passed the test How much you are prone to boredom, then I recommend to go through it before reading further.
Problems and troubles associated with boredom.
Let's go further. So what kind of troubles for the person is a chronic feeling of boredom?
- Frequent nervous tension
- Alcohol / drug addiction (precisely because of boredom, many people cannot stop drinking / smoking, and even if they succeed, only for a while, then return to bad habits again)
- Inability to withstand long trips, meetings, even rest (the desire to get back to work as soon as possible)
- Inability to concentrate
- Inability to relax, chronic fatigue
- Painful craving for shopping
- Congestion of the brain with multiple tasks, “informational garbage”
- Anxiety
- Apathy and longing in the absence of activity
- Satiation of life
- As a result, the wrong life choices, loss of opportunities, false goals and aspirations, unhappiness and inability to get full enjoyment of life.
Impressive, isn't it? But I think you are not accustomed to seeing boredom as a source of evil, and you may be surprised by a look at this state from this angle. Do not worry, reading my blog, you will often encounter similar provisions: first, I declare that some property of your personality, about the presence of which you are not accustomed to worrying, is in fact the cause of problems and an obstacle to self-development, and lucidly explain why it is this way and not otherwise.
But what will surprise you most is that I do not just designate problem areas in order to point out once again the imperfection of human nature, while calling something a problem, I say that you can get rid of it, no matter how confident you are in the opposite, and showing the current way to do it.
Can one stop feeling bored at all?
Why should this come as a surprise? I will explain. Surely, many believe that boredom is the natural state of a person in the absence of any activity, and therefore it cannot be eliminated, as well as from hunger or thirst. Or are you sure that being bored is a property of your nature, you, a person who needs activity and will always strive for it. I declare that this is just a lack of personality, and a very serious one, which can be eliminated, like all other shortcomings. This may be surprising.
But no matter how unreal it may sound, I myself got rid of such a state: I almost never get bored. Because of this, I am always relaxed and in a sense of comfort: on long journeys, in waiting hours, which many may find weary. I know how to enjoy rest, inaction and contemplation, which deeply relaxes me. I don't need to smoke or drink to entertain myself.
I do what I find interesting, and do not burden myself with unnecessary, useless activities, so as not to be bored. I can spend a long time alone with myself: I do not shake in a frantic rush to clubs, restaurants, in order to at least somehow take their time. In general, I can enjoy every given minute and I don’t rush to do everything to live this moment as soon as possible.
Why is it so important to spend more time alone with yourself?
Boredom reduces the amount of time you can spend alone with yourself, because it constantly forces you to look for an occupation or a society. This can be a serious life obstacle. As in moments of calm contemplation and reflection, the most valuable thoughts come to you. You can make an important decision, rethink the experience that has been lived through, realize the futility and futility of your current aspirations, set a goal more suitable for you and not follow the false impulses imposed on you from outside.
The more people are busy with their business and the less often they have moments of thought, the worse they are able to make independent decisions and follow a conscious course, because they think little and all their energy is “extinguished” by different activities. Do you know why soldiers in the army should be busy all the time? And so I thought less and submitted more.
In totalitarian societies or various book dystopias (Orwell - 1984, Huxley - O brave new world), an individual must be subject to constant informational or sensory influence for his successful enslavement by the ruling class: exhausting so that there is no strength left. And in moments of rest, he either listens to the radio, or watches TV with silly patriotic programs. So no seditious thoughts about the imperfection of the state and the meaninglessness of his life as a social cell, a working ant, come to his head, since there is no time for these thoughts to come.
As a result, a person can no longer spend time alone with himself: he is bored and sometimes scary. He is in panic looking for an occupation or a way to clog the “information channel”. Now you understand that boredom does not arise simply as the natural need of consciousness? Rather, it is a consequence of constant employment, indiscriminate consumption of information and impressions by the brain, or it is a symptom of existential emptiness and lack of internal content (I’ll talk about this at the end of the article).
As a result, you stop to perceive life as a valuable gift, as a set of opportunities and interesting events, as existence in the name of yourself! You strive to kill every precious moment of existence, to drown him in unnecessary affairs, senseless amusements and alcohol. You are in constant flight from yourself, from your thoughts! It turns out that life loses its value for you and you can no longer enjoy it just like that.
Boredom is like a drug
Boredom makes you addicted to yourself and deprives you of your choices about what to do and when. You have to run somewhere: consume tons of any information, a bunch of “informational garbage”, make unnecessary purchases, stay in constant search for all sorts of entertainment, including forbidden ones, engage in self-indulgence (drugs, including alcohol), watch silly programs, engage in foolishness work and pointless burn and squander life.
This is reminiscent of the action movie "Adrenaline," in which the hero Jason Statham is injected with some kind of fantastic substance-drug, and its effect is that the person to whom it is injected dies after some time, and the only way to stop the destructive effect of the poison - This is to maintain a constant production of adrenaline. Therefore, the hero has to run and shoot, rush under the car, jump from a great height without a parachute (not forgetting about shooting). Similarly, many people are attached to the sources of boredom killing.
Moreover, these sources are not infinite. Gradually, the “dose” has to be increased: to look for more exotic entertainments, to make more expensive purchases, since usual things already bother you and cease to be satisfying. If you do not do this, then a stupid satiety is formed, and as a result of apathy, again boredom, "breaking." I do not just use the terms from the world of drug addiction, since the chronic feeling of boredom is the "breaking" of the body that is used to constant external stimulation and replenishment with impressions.
Therefore, attempts to cope with the state of boredom through the search for new ways of such a flight are as meaningless as removing nicotine cravings by smoking cigarettes. Yes, you will satisfy the local need, but only for a while, until it reappears, and the further it becomes, the stronger it will be and demand more and more from you ... To avoid the desire to smoke, you need to quit this habit wean from cigarettes, eliminate the causes of their addiction and never smoke! This is the best way, which is obvious. Therefore, I will try to teach you how not to feel bored at all ... Or almost not to feel.
Boredom as a motivation?
I can argue that boredom is a valid incentive for any work, without it you would not budge at all and would not do anything ... She helped you to achieve something.
OK, then we come back again to the analogies from the life of drug addicts. Suppose someone lived - did not hurt, was lazy and did not work and somehow existed on pennies. Then he got addicted to drugs. Now he needs more money to buy for himself. If he does not work, he will suffer, so he had to find a better paying job, not to skip it and try to keep it.
So, we now thank the drugs for helping him to achieve something? I think you should not do this, because despite the material success, a person degrades due to his addiction (just as he loses interest in life because of boredom). The whole problem was in his laziness, which did not allow him to find a good job, or in general this money was not particularly needed for him: and so it was all arranged.
A person should be motivated by a lively interest, a desire to develop, achieve goals and realize their potential, and not boredom, which turns you into a diligent worker and an obedient robot. It is better to strive for the most suitable work for yourself (or not to work at all if you do not like it, and there is a material opportunity not to do it), and not to look for any one that you’ve found just to occupy yourself and kill boredom.
If you look at boredom as a motive, you can fall into a vicious circle: you work, but work does not bring you pleasure, but you also can NOT work, because you are afraid to get bored in boredom.
In this case, your work covers the whole area of your interests, you do not imagine what to do in its absence.
Perhaps this is due to the lack of other hobbies. You cannot think of an occupation for yourself, you wait until someone organizes it for you, your company, for example ... This is how life goes: in unloved work and in the tiny intervals of rest between working hours. And even while relaxing, you devote little time to yourself, but continue to run from boredom, drowning in an avalanche of information, fuss, affairs and alcohol. What remains for themselves after this?
Let's reject in this example the financial aspect, saying that they have to work in order to have something to live on.
Yes, it certainly is. But, first, I know a lot of people who have the opportunity not to engage in daily routine work in the office, as there is some other wealth, but nevertheless, despite this, they get hired work, because they don’t Represent what they take in their free time.
Secondly, if you are not afraid of the prospect of a large amount of free time and are not afraid suddenly to be alone with your thoughts, then you will probably start looking for ways to save yourself from the annoying, everyday routine, and start creating sources of income does not take so much time and effort. And instead of spinning a squirrel in a wheel, burning nerves, energy, health, youth and potential, you will plan opportunities that will allow you to devote more time to yourself and live for yourself.
How will a person change when you get rid of boredom
Here we come to the most important thing. While it may seem to you that there is no big problem in that you can be bored and you do not know what to do and entertain yourself. You just do not realize how much fuller and richer life becomes when you manage to cope with the subjective causes of boredom!
Immediately make a reservation, if you embark on this path, then you will have to go through several significant personal metamorphoses.
Having got rid of the feeling of boredom, you will learn to enjoy rest, moments of peace and inaction, time spent in dialogue with yourself, or doing your favorite thing, your hobby. You will begin to feel comfortable being alone for a long time. Therefore, it will seem that free time will be sorely lacking.
Favorite work may cease to be loved, and the unloved will become even more unpleasant due to the fact that it alienates you from yourself, and instead of devoting time to yourself and your loved ones, develop yourself, learn new things, improve yourself, you spend it on some kind of corporate red tape and participation in office squabbles. And you will begin to clearly understand this.
I, too, bonuses, you say, you lived, didn’t hurt, worked, drank on Fridays, went to Ikea on weekends, arranged everything, and now you come and say that I will teach you self-development, as a result of which we will be disgusted with all these things and we will begin to grieve for some unattainable freedom! Good your advice, Nikolai! We must be content with what you have!
To this, I will answer that, firstly, the result of self-development and, if you allow to use such a term, “expansion of consciousness”, is a kind of overestimation of values, a change in your view of things, the input of which you begin to strive for the new and change the usual course of things. This is natural and inevitable. Remember how you grew up, turned from a child into an adult? Many things that seemed important in childhood lost their value for you when you reached a certain age. In fact, “growing up” can continue until old age and the fact that you are now 30, 40 years old does not mean that you have reached the peak of maturity. Worst of all, when this process stops for good, and you don’t even know about it ...
Secondly, freedom is not at all unattainable, and the lifestyle that requires you to keep you at work at work is not an alternative. There are many ways to get rid of the burden of useless work, but this topic is a separate article ...
But new goals will appear in front of you: what you should strive for in order to achieve happiness. You slowly begin to implement your life project.
Freedom from boredom will also manifest in the love of contemplative pastime: reading, thinking, enjoying nature, leisurely walks. You will experience the joy of these things and as a result you will enjoy life more! This can significantly relieve your brain and lead to peace and a sense of inner comfort, order and joy, as well as, thanks to reflections, you rethink and understand many things. During the rest, you will really “rest”, and not ruin your health with alcoholic libations: I assure you, the body does not rest while you are drunk!
Yes, and you will no longer enjoy the pleasure of alcohol, because, firstly, you will be more relaxed and there is no need to relieve something, and secondly, self-sufficiency will appear, you will be well alone with yourself or your loved ones and you will not need that something to use. After all, you remember that boredom is one of the causes of bad habits? Наверняка знаете сколько много людей спивается в деревне, угадайте от чего.
Вы станете спокойны, вас не будут утомлять длительные поездки и часы ожидания, каждый момент вашей жизни обретет полноту и самость: он не будет восприниматься просто как переход от чего-то к чему-то, как отрезок времени, соединяющий две точки, этот момент наполнится ценностью сам по себе! Это подарит радость жизни и ощущение величия каждого мига существования!
Вы поймете, как же немного надо для счастья! Это не значит, что можно быть счастливым в лохмотьях и живя в помойке. Не поймите меня неправильно, я вовсе не проповедую отречение от земных благ. Я имею ввиду, то, что вы, возможно тратили уйму сил денег и здоровья в погоне за развлечениями и вещами, думая, что обладание вещами принесет вам счастье. Это следствие зияющей внутренней пустоты, которую вы стремились заполнить покупкой вещей и всякими необычными ощущениями.
Когда вы справитесь с этой пустотой, обретете внутреннюю гармонию и самодостаточность. Вам не нужно будет спускать в трубу кучу денег, только затем, чтобы почувствовать себя живыми и победить разъедающую вас изнутри скуку.
В общем избавление от скуки сулит счастье, гармонию, самодостаточность и спокойствие. Это те вещи, которых вам может не доставать, пока вы подвержены такому состоянию как скука.
Теперь перейдем, наконец-то к заключительной части статьи, а именно к тому, как избавиться от чувства скуки.
Как избавиться от чувства скуки
Если вы прочитали то, что я написал выше и немножко «впитали» это в себя, то уже сделали часть дела. Моей главной задачей было навести вас на определенный курс мыслей, вселить в вас понимание о скуке как о неком пороке, разрушающим личность. Если такое понимание есть и существует определенный моральный настрой с этим справляться и достичь радости жизни, то все нижеприведенные практические советы, рекомендации не будут нести для вас характер откровений. Они весьма очевидно и логично следуют уже из того что я говорил.
Итак преступим.
Как обрести радость жизни, уничтожив скуку
Вот несколько советов, следуя которым вы не будете испытывать скуку.
Проводите больше времени наедине с собой: по ходу этого времени пытайтесь успокоится, расслабиться. Размышляйте о чем-то, лучше об отвлеченном, не привязанном к текущему моменту. Не думайте о работе о текущих делах, а стройте планы, думайте о себе и своем будущем, о том как достичь своего счастья и что для этого нужно делать. Критически оценивайте свое текущее семейное, финансовое, положение, состояние здоровья и ума, думайте если ли там какие-то проблемы?
Можно ли их решить и как это сделать? Если не получается заставить себя думать, сосредоточится и вас отвлекают мысли о текущих делах, то надо научиться расслабляться, очищать разум и приводить мысли в порядок, этому вас научит:
Медитация: да, в каждой своей статье я советую (даже настаиваю) ей заниматься, как это делать, читайте по ссылке. Ошибка полагать что не существует универсального упражнения, помогающего избавиться от многих проблем. Такое упражнение есть - это медитация. Практикуя которую, вы научитесь расслабляться и очищать мозг от мыслей, существовать в настоящем моменте, отбрасывая заботы о будущем и прошлые воспоминания.
Действие этой практики прямо направленно на устранение главного источника скуки: внутреннего беспокойства и страха остаться наедине с собой. Во время медитации вы прислушиваетесь к тому что происходит внутри, налаживая связь со своим организмом. Она помогает взглянуть на многие вещи трезво и непредвзято и избавиться тем самым от многих предрассудков. Это пожалуй то с чего нужно приступить, избавиться от скуки.
Наполненность внутренним содержанием: одной из причин того, почему вы скучаете когда остаетесь в тишине, вдали от всех, может являться экзистенциальная пустота. Несмотря на мудреное слово, за этим термином скрывается вполне понятная вещь. Эта пустота образуется когда у человека отсутствуют интересы, увлечения, маленькие радости, размышления, мечты, осознанные желания и воля.
Это когда личность унылым планктоном барахтается на поверхности бытия и ее уносит потоками судьбы в произвольном направлении. В общем не буду подробно останавливаться, это обширная тема, которая требует отдельной статьи. Короче из-за этой пустоты вам тоскливо наедине с собой, так как вы не выступаете в роли интересного собеседника для внутреннего диалога. Поэтому читайте больше хороших книг, блогов, и статей, общайтесь с умными людьми, смотрите качественные фильмы и размышляйте, размышляйте, размышляйте.
Созерцание: учитесь наслаждаться тишиной и покоем. Можете просто подолгу валяться на траве, смотреть в небо и стараться ни о чем не думать или же лежать в кровати, закрыв глаза, слушая спокойную, медленную музыку. Пытайтесь проводить больше времени на природе, в тишине. Гуляйте, ходите медленным шагом, просто смотря по сторонам.
Смените темп вашего отдыха: на более спокойный и размеренный. Никуда не спешите, не стремитесь все успеть, старайтесь наслаждаться каждой свободной минутой. (Читайте статью Как правильно отдыхать во время отпуска
Придумайте себе хобби, занятие: выберете область, в которой вы хотели бы развиваться и получать какие-то навыки, например, фотография и обработка фотографий, велоспорт, музыка (это может быть как освоение музыкального инструмента, так и получение навыков работы в компьютерных приложениях(секвенсорах) по созданию музыки и мастерингу, зависит от того, что вам ближе), программирование, написание статей в блоге, шахматы, покер, духовные практики и т.д. etc. Не думайте, что у вас ни к чему не лежит душа, так как, чтобы по-настоящему увлечься каким-то делом, нужно им хоть немножко овладеть.
Любое занятие, даже самое нелюбимое в начале, способно начать приносить радость, как только оно у вас будет получаться лучше, чем у других, и появится какой-то навык. Стоит только начать. Попробуйте себя и там и сям, экспериментируйте. Вместо того, чтобы тратить свободное время дома и на работе на всякую ерунду, займитесь чем-нибудь, что будет вас развивать, что сделает ваш досуг продуктивным. И кто знает, может быть новое хобби, когда вы им овладеете в совершенстве, в будущем станет ваши любимым делом, благодаря которому вы обретете финансовую независимость, избавитесь от офисных оков и измените вашу жизнь к лучшему. Только нужно приступить, не лениться и не бояться узнавать новое и пробовать себя в разных вещах.
Терпите одиночество и монотонность: старайтесь расслабляться во время длительных поездок, времени, проведенного в общественном транспорте или в часы ожидания. Если вы привыкли занимать руки айфоном или пивом, то пора от этого избавляться.
Избавляйтесь от избыточной активности и рассеянного внимания: часто скука связана с постоянным чувством внутреннего беспокойства, неспособностью долго удерживать внимание на чем-то одном, потребности постоянно получать информацию, бесцельной двигательной активностью. В академических кругах это называется синдром дефицита внимания и гиперактивности. Это целый отдельный вопрос. И о том, как избавиться от этого синдрома, читайте по ссылке.
Вот и все, что касается чувства хронической скуки. Избавление от этого подразумевает много внутренней работы и массу личностных метаморфоз. Сначала будет нелегко, придется прикладывать большие усилия и перешагивать через себя. Но зато потом вас поразят результаты проделанной работы, уверяю вас.
