It is difficult to find love, but it is even more difficult at times to save relationships. Many girls who are not fortunate enough to experience an unwanted parting with their loved ones ask themselves: "How to return the man who left you? What should be done for this?"
Love is the most desirable feeling, the main human need and the basis of personal happiness. Psychological well-being and health directly depend on having close relationships in a person’s life.
In my personal conviction, love is an inner state of the soul. Love does not come and does not go away, but only manifests itself in the external world, if the inner world of a person is filled with it. She is embodied in many subjects and objects. That is why love is different and we are able, even after the hardest disappointment, to fall in love again.
What do psychologists say
Psychologists recommend girls going through the following steps:
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Get rid of negative feelings: anger, resentment, guilt, despair. Plenty cry, shout, beat a safe object (ideally - a punching bag). The main thing is not to dive too into this process. The task is to relieve stress, and not close in the experience "I am so unhappy!". - Take it easy. Different primo relaxation will help here: meditation, yoga, nature walks, massage, sports, water procedures. The goal is to regain the ability to think soberly.
- Analyze the relationship with the ex-boyfriend and identify the reasons for separation.
Get rid of negative feelings: anger, resentment, guilt, despair. Plenty cry, shout, beat a safe object (ideally - a punching bag). The main thing is not to dive too into this process. The task is to relieve stress, and not close in the experience "I am so unhappy!".Both partners are always to blame for breaking off relations, but you should pay attention to your own mistakes. Write them on a piece of paper. What did you do wrong? Overly guardians, controlled, jealous, rude, did not pay enough attention to the partner?
- Sincerely answer the questions:
- Am I ready to work on myself and make the necessary changes in my life?
- Do I need a guy who left me?
- Do I really want to return it?
- Believe in the possibility of personal happiness and ... become happy!
The surest way to get your loved one back is to be happy without him!
This is the most important step that deserves separate consideration.
How to turn misfortune into happiness
It seems to an abandoned girl that the feelings experienced for a man are the only love in her life. Is this so? But what about self-love? Do you love yourself?
Psychologists say that the guarantee of happiness is the love of self. When a person loves himself, he is loved by others. It is out of self-love, and not for the sake of the guy who left, work on the flaws that you found, talking about the reasons for separation.
If annoying - learn to leave your close ones the right to be alone; if you are jealous, work on self-confidence; if you have a habit of patronizing others - take the time that you previously allotted for this occupation, to yourself!
Harmonizing the inner world, do not forget about looks. With love for yourself, and not with contempt, go in for sports, change your wardrobe, hair style, make-up, get rid of bad habits that spoil your appearance, improve your health.
When you love, the rule works: like attracts like! To return the love of a man - love yourself!
Have you noticed that as soon as a girl has a boyfriend, her ex-men immediately remember her and start flirting other men? This happens because a girl in love radiates love, and like attracts like!
Action algorithm
It will take several months for you to take care of yourself. At this time, do not communicate and try not to see the ex-boyfriend.
In no case immediately after parting:
- don't beg him to come back;
- don't follow him;
- do not pester the phone calls;
- do not send SMS, letters, gifts and other signs of attention;
- Do not try to prove the necessity and value of your relationship.
As time passes, you may feel that the former boyfriend is no longer needed, and you are ready to meet a better and more suitable man.
But if you still want to return your loved one, call him or write a text message. Over the past time, a man will have time to analyze the gap, calm down and, with other favorable circumstances, will certainly contact you.
The reason for the call may be a desire to find out how he is doing, or a request to help in some business. Talk with a guy calmly, kindly, with respect.
The former guy will certainly notice the internal and external changes that have occurred to you. Communication should be easy and relaxed.
A man must understand that life has not stopped without him, and you are happy without him.
If during the conversation you realize that the guy is ready to continue communication, make it clear that you also do not mind, but do not offer him to immediately resume the relationship.
The reason for the continuation of the relationship may be common interests, hobbies, friends. In the period of rapprochement, be independent and respect the freedom of the individual man.
If after a time you feel that the guy is ready to resume the relationship, invite him on a one-on-one date and there already reveal your feelings.
So, little by little, you can return the lost love. And if it doesn't work, be sure - there is a new meeting with love ahead of you!
